Throwback: ‘Terminator 2: Judgment Day’

Today is director James Cameron‘s 60th birthday, so we’re going to take a few hours out from our day to look back his greatest film. No, it’s not Titanic, and it’s certainly not Avatar. It’s Terminator 2: Judgment Day.

Yeah, Terminator 2: Judgment Day. What? It’s perfect. At least, I remember it as being perfect.

So, let’s rewatch Terminator 2: Judgment Day together and answer the big, important, deep questions that we still have about the film. Like, is Sarah Conner as much as a badass as we remember? Could SkyNet take over everything? What’s so cool about John Conner anyway? Does the film stand the test of time? And most importantly, will it make me cry as much as Guardians of the Galaxy did?

1:29 – I mean, sure, I could see this happening to Los Angeles in 15 years.

6:40 – The Terminator: He’s like the biggest bodybuilding baby ever.

9:42 – “I don’t want to sound like a traitor to my generation or anything, but I don’t get Arnold Schwarzenegger as a sex symbol. I mean, his body is so perfect, it’s like an alien, he can barely emote, he beats people up, steals their stereotypically cool clothes and then ‘Bad to the Bone’ is fucking playing? And we’re supposed to swoon? Like, hello, I don’t think so.”

12:10 – Oh, the bad Terminator is like an angry, violent baby.

13:53 – The coolest thing about John Connor is his best friend is Budnick from Salute Your Shorts.

28:30 – Question: I know that John and Sarah Connor aren’t supposed to know that this is the good Terminator. However, was the 1991 audience not supposed to know that, either? How was this film marketed? I don’t remember! I was 6 years old.

34:43 – Hot dude. Also…this was made in 1991?!?!?!

39:10 – Can I get a liquid metal sword arm for fall? It’s super stylish and would make walking home alone at night stress-free.

46:00 – VOM VOM VOM VOM

49:24 – My colleague, Tyler Coates, has informed me that these are twin actors playing the “same” part. Trivia!

50:26 – SUCK IT, FACELICKER. DEATH TO ALL NONCONSENSUAL FACELICKERS.

1:15:50 – I realize that there’s a moment happening, but how badass is she? I need this sunglasses like whoa.

1:18:36 – …and no one’s a badass in the wake of an imagined nuclear disaster.

1:26:07 – Do you think that Sarah Conner would love as John Conner much if he was, like, just a normal punk kid? Or is she this super obsessed because he’s going to save humanity? Or is she just a mom? Do you think Sarah Conner likes John Conner for his personality?

1:54:40 – I looked just like this last winter during the polar vortex.

2:01:35 – I want to pause right here to ask, why does the bad Terminator need her to call to John? Can’t he imitate both her voice and appearance?

2:05:53 – …like he does four minutes later?

2:09:09 – This is my second Throwback in a month that could be a possible Phantom of the Opera origin story.

2:10:37 – Okay, so I did not cry at all during this film, which means I cried twice as much while watching Guardians of the Galaxy (*cough* “We are Groot.” *cough*) That said, I am jealous that I have never had a killer robot from the future as a surrogate father figure.

And yes, the film is as perfect as we remember it being. It’s a brilliantly made action film from top-to-bottom. Congrats, James Cameron. You did a good job.

Photos: TriStar Pictures