Fun
Frisky
Nostalgic
Intense
Adventurous
Choked Up
Curious
Romantic
Weird
Surely you’ve heard the phrase, “This milk is spoiled. Taste it.” I’ll willing to bet that you’ve said a similar thing about a terrible movie, too — a movie so bad that you just had to convince a friend to check it out, too. And hey, maybe the thing that makes it so bad — the bad acting, in implausible plot, the crazy twist at the end — is the thing that makes it so good, too. Here are ten films that no one would suggest are great works of art. But they are, at times, so bonkers that you just have to check them out for yourself.
'Toys' (1992)
In the last two weeks, we’ve remembered some of Robin Williams‘ great contributions to film. Most of us have conveniently forgotten Toys, a manic and insane fantasy about a toy factory taken over by an angry army general and LL Cool J. Just when you think it could’t get more nuts, Joan Cusack turns out to be a robot. [GoWatchIt]
'Soul Man' (1986)
C. Thomas Howell plays a young man who dons blackface (well, an extra dose of tanning pills) in order to get a full ride at Harvard University. The most shocking thing is that Soul Man was released in 1986 — not 1936. [GoWatchIt]
'The Apple' (1980)
There have been plenty of downright nutty movie musicals in the history of cinema, but The Apple takes the cake for most insane. Set 14 years into the future (1994, that is), The Apple follows a pair of sweet, naive Canadians who try to make it in the music business. The film ends, inexplicably, with the Rapture. [GoWatchIt]
'Gymkata' (1985)
Widely considered to be one of the worst movies ever made, Gymkata stars real-life Olympic gymnast Kurt Thomas, who is sent by the SIA (the Special Intelligence Agency) to the fictional country of Parmistan. All foreigners who enter the mountain nation must enter The Game, which is an endurance competition that typically leaves most of its participants dead. It’s a rarity for a movie this bad to transcend its terribleness and become a comic work of art. [GoWatchIt]
'The Hot Chick' (2002)
Times were tough for Rachel McAdams and Anna Faris, two perfectly terrific actresses who found themselves costarring alongside the bottom of the comedy barrel, Rob Schneider, in this idiotic comedy in which Schneider and McAdams switch bodies (sort of). Hilarity does not ensure, but it’s pretty astounding nonetheless. [GoWatchIt]
'Color of Night' (1994)
This erotic thriller starring Bruce Willis was notable for one thing: the sex. Well, that and the very brief glimpse of Willis’ penis. So, you know, you have that calling you in the event that you can’t live without watching Bruce Willis boning a no-name ingenue in a pool. It also features a pretty ridiculous third-act twist which, if you’re not a blind person, you could see coming from miles away. [GoWatchIt]
'Across the Universe' (2007)
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SSnw1JaL2uA] A jukebox musical inspired by The Beatles? Groan. Directed by Julie Taymor? Oh, okay! Unfortunately Taymor, who is known for her inspired direction of The Lion King on Broadway and a big-screen adaptation of Shakespeare’s violent and nutty Titus Andronicus, completely missed the mark with this tepid and overly literal pile of poop. Sure, Across the Universe has got some inventive visuals. But then a bunch of soldiers carry the Statue of Liberty across an Asian battlefield while singing “I Want You (She’s So Heavy),” so… [GoWatchIt]
'Safe Haven' (2013)
You might think this romantic drama, based on one of Nicholas Sparks’ modern-day dime-store novels, is a pretty lame by-the-books melodrama starring two pretty — and pretty boring — actors who spend their time on screen staring longingly at each other. Oh, but then there’s the third-act twist that turns this movie, for some unknown reason, into a ghost story? [GoWatchIt]
'The Village' (2004)
The Village starts as a pretty tense psychological thriller: the residents of an 18th-Century-ish town are terrorized by creatures that live in the woods. But what begins as a moody and beautifully shot film from the contentious writer-director M. Night Shyamalan swifty turns into a groan-inducing and lame attempt at cheating its audience into being spooked and leaving them with a pretty lame twist ending. But hey, it’s pretty amazing he had the balls to pull the rug out from under us, and shame on us for trusting him yet again. [GoWatchIt]
'Beyond the Valley of the Dolls' (1970)
While the original film based on Jacqueline Susann’s bestselling novel is a particularly well-made melodrama that gets a bad rap for its poorly written musical numbers, over-the-top acting, and the inane drug themes, its “sequel” is a balls-to-the-wall exploitation flick. Directed by Russ Meyer and co-written by Roger Ebert, Beyond the Valley of the Dolls follows three young rockers who head to L.A., where they encounter free love, psychedelic drugs, and sword-wielding homicidal transvestites. [GoWatchIt]
