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It’s the television event of the season! That’s right, Peter Pan Live! airs tonight, and finally we’ll get the answers to all of our questions. Can Allison Williams handle a starring role? Can Christopher Walken hoof it in pirate boots? How racist will those Indians be?

While you’ll likely be preparing to live-tweet the three-hour event (and NBC certainly hopes you do, as they’re betting on a lot of hate-watching to be taking place tonight), your hilarious jokes about the live musical broadcast will certainly flow out easier if you lubricate yourself with several beverages of your choice. That’s why we’ve taken it upon ourselves to give you some ideas for the drinking game you and your friends will most certainly be participating in this evening as you watch with bated breath every time Allison Williams comes close to slamming into a wall while dangling from those wires. We hope she survives this, and we hope you do, too.

TAKE A DRINK:

Any time Captain Hook tap-dances.

Any time a member of the cast claps.

Any time a line is flubbed.

Any time Smee does something that could be described as being “classic Smee!”

Any time Minnie Driver narrates something and you suddenly remember Minnie Driver is the narrator.

TAKE TWO DRINKS:

Any time Allison Williams looks scared.

Any time Tiger Lily or one of the Indians does something “problematic.”

Any time Captain Hook’s hat falls off.

Any time Captain Hook’s hook falls off.

Any time a lost boy or a pirate trips.

CHUG-A-WUGG:

Any time you question the sexual tension between Peter and Captain Hook.

Any time something happens that Lena Dunham might label “subversive.”

Any time a wire breaks.

Any time Allison Williams’ lips look tired from maintaining a British accent.

Any time you wonder, “Did they do that on purpose?”

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Photos: NBC