Fun
Frisky
Nostalgic
Intense
Adventurous
Choked Up
Curious
Romantic
WeirdSexy Neighbors Yeah! (GALLERY)
By Mark Graham
@unclegrambo
Published
Jan. 23, 2015, 3:43 p.m. ET
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NUMBER TEN
WHO: Brad Abramson (Patrick Wilson) and Sarah Pierce (Kate Winslet)
WHERE: Little Children (2006)
WELL, DID THEY BONE? These naughty neighbors committed adultery many times, including some very vigorous basement boning (NSFW).
WHO: Brad Abramson (Patrick Wilson) and Sarah Pierce (Kate Winslet)
WHERE: Little Children (2006)
WELL, DID THEY BONE? These naughty neighbors committed adultery many times, including some very vigorous basement boning (NSFW).
Photo: Everett Collection
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NUMBER NINE
WHO: Danielle (Elisha Cuthbert)
WHERE: The Girl Next Door
WELL, DID THEY BONE? In this surprisingly humane and sweet 2004 tale, Matthew (Emile Hirsch) develops a huge crush on the girl next door, which only grows when he discovers that she is a porn star. But yes, they bone… In a limo!
WHO: Danielle (Elisha Cuthbert)
WHERE: The Girl Next Door
WELL, DID THEY BONE? In this surprisingly humane and sweet 2004 tale, Matthew (Emile Hirsch) develops a huge crush on the girl next door, which only grows when he discovers that she is a porn star. But yes, they bone… In a limo!
Photo: Everett Collection
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NUMBER EIGHT
WHO: Jerry (Colin Farrell)
WHERE: Fright Night (2011)
WELL, DID THEY BONE? Charley (Anton Yelchin) and his mom moved to Vegas and who do they end up living next door to? Colin Farrell, that’s who. Oh, did we mention that he happens to be a vampire? Farrell drips pure sex in this film, and in the end, he ends up boning Charley’s girlfriend. #Vampires
WHO: Jerry (Colin Farrell)
WHERE: Fright Night (2011)
WELL, DID THEY BONE? Charley (Anton Yelchin) and his mom moved to Vegas and who do they end up living next door to? Colin Farrell, that’s who. Oh, did we mention that he happens to be a vampire? Farrell drips pure sex in this film, and in the end, he ends up boning Charley’s girlfriend. #Vampires
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NUMBER SEVEN
WHO: Marty (Natalie Portman)
WHERE: Beautiful Girls
WELL, DID THEY BONE? Marty is the (female) next door neighbor of Willie (Tim Hutton). Her preternaturally wise soul belied her youth —Portman was 14 at the time of filming— and led the then 36-year-old Hutton to develop a serious crush on her. Wisely, he resisted the urge to get physical.
WHO: Marty (Natalie Portman)
WHERE: Beautiful Girls
WELL, DID THEY BONE? Marty is the (female) next door neighbor of Willie (Tim Hutton). Her preternaturally wise soul belied her youth —Portman was 14 at the time of filming— and led the then 36-year-old Hutton to develop a serious crush on her. Wisely, he resisted the urge to get physical.
Photo: Everett Collection
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NUMBER SIX
WHO: Ned Flanders
WHERE: The Simpsons
WELL, DID THEY BONE? Heidi-ho, neighboroonie! Ned is the annoying, do gooder neighbor who lives next to The Simpsons … who also happens to be a total stackhouse! Marge indulges in a few fantasies about Ned from time-to-time, but no, they never get it on.
WHO: Ned Flanders
WHERE: The Simpsons
WELL, DID THEY BONE? Heidi-ho, neighboroonie! Ned is the annoying, do gooder neighbor who lives next to The Simpsons … who also happens to be a total stackhouse! Marge indulges in a few fantasies about Ned from time-to-time, but no, they never get it on.
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NUMBER FIVE
WHO: Tenley Parrish (Jessica Biel)
WHERE: Summer Catch
WELL, DID THEY BONE? We have to be honest. We never saw this movie. We do, however, remember the scene in which a dripping wet Jessica Biel emerges from a swimming pool while Freddie Prinze Jr. rides a lawnmower. So, we’re not sure if they boned or not. Can you help us in the comments?
WHO: Tenley Parrish (Jessica Biel)
WHERE: Summer Catch
WELL, DID THEY BONE? We have to be honest. We never saw this movie. We do, however, remember the scene in which a dripping wet Jessica Biel emerges from a swimming pool while Freddie Prinze Jr. rides a lawnmower. So, we’re not sure if they boned or not. Can you help us in the comments?
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NUMBER FOUR
WHO: Ricky Fitts (Wes Bentley) and Jane Burnham (Thora Birch)
WHERE: American Beauty
WELL, DID THEY BONE? Oh yes. Many times. There’s only so many times one can watch a stupid plastic bag floating around a stupid parking lot, you know, before the panties drop. Especially when high grade marijuana and old school camcorders are involved.
WHO: Ricky Fitts (Wes Bentley) and Jane Burnham (Thora Birch)
WHERE: American Beauty
WELL, DID THEY BONE? Oh yes. Many times. There’s only so many times one can watch a stupid plastic bag floating around a stupid parking lot, you know, before the panties drop. Especially when high grade marijuana and old school camcorders are involved.
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NUMBER THREE
WHO: Sylvia (Linda Cardellini) and Don Draper (Jon Hamm)
WHERE: Mad Men
WELL, DID THEY BONE? What could possibly go wrong with a little afternoon delight? We’ll tell you what — not remembering to lock the door! Ask Sally Draper, who caught these two cheating cheaters doing the nasty and ended up scarred for life.
WHO: Sylvia (Linda Cardellini) and Don Draper (Jon Hamm)
WHERE: Mad Men
WELL, DID THEY BONE? What could possibly go wrong with a little afternoon delight? We’ll tell you what — not remembering to lock the door! Ask Sally Draper, who caught these two cheating cheaters doing the nasty and ended up scarred for life.
Photo: Everett Collection
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NUMBER TWO
WHO: Ben Braddock (Dustin Hoffman) and Mrs. Robinson (Anne Bancroft)
WHERE: The Graduate
WELL, DID THEY BONE? Does a one-legged duck swim in circles?
WHO: Ben Braddock (Dustin Hoffman) and Mrs. Robinson (Anne Bancroft)
WHERE: The Graduate
WELL, DID THEY BONE? Does a one-legged duck swim in circles?
Photo: Everett Collection
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NUMBER ONE
WHO: Sally (Susan Sarandon)
WHERE: Atlantic City
WELL, DID THEY BONE? This tremendously depressing film from 1980 was nominated for all of the major Academy Awards in 1981 (Picture, Director, Actor, Actress, Screenplay), but might be most memorable for the scene(s) in which Susan Sarandon squeezes lemon juice onto, um —how do we say this politely?— herself right there in her window, in plain view of her neighbor Lou (Burt Lancaster). Lou often watches this ritual, and eventually beds Sally after (SPOILER ALERT) her coke dealer husband gets killed by the mob. Best neighbor ever? Well…
WHO: Sally (Susan Sarandon)
WHERE: Atlantic City
WELL, DID THEY BONE? This tremendously depressing film from 1980 was nominated for all of the major Academy Awards in 1981 (Picture, Director, Actor, Actress, Screenplay), but might be most memorable for the scene(s) in which Susan Sarandon squeezes lemon juice onto, um —how do we say this politely?— herself right there in her window, in plain view of her neighbor Lou (Burt Lancaster). Lou often watches this ritual, and eventually beds Sally after (SPOILER ALERT) her coke dealer husband gets killed by the mob. Best neighbor ever? Well…
Photo: Everett Collection
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HONORABLE MENTION
WHO: Wilson Wilson (Earl Hindman)
WHERE: Home Improvement
WELL, DID THEY BONE? The next door neighbor of Tim “Tool Time” Taylor, Wilson, was a mystery. We never saw his face, so what homeboy has got packin’ is something that is completely up to you and your imagination. Did they ever bone? I’m sure there’s some slashfic out there that says yes, but I have yet to find it.
WHO: Wilson Wilson (Earl Hindman)
WHERE: Home Improvement
WELL, DID THEY BONE? The next door neighbor of Tim “Tool Time” Taylor, Wilson, was a mystery. We never saw his face, so what homeboy has got packin’ is something that is completely up to you and your imagination. Did they ever bone? I’m sure there’s some slashfic out there that says yes, but I have yet to find it.
Photo: Everett Collection
