Fun
Frisky
Nostalgic
Intense
Adventurous
Choked Up
Curious
Romantic
Weird
Valentine’s Day is approaching, which means you’re about to feel pressured into scrambling for a date. But this year, you’re not going to give in. It’s time to put down Tinder and listen up. Many of your favorite fictional characters are in love with objects and food, not people. It’s time to break out your favorite snack and follow their lead.
Consider this list 18 justifications for you to spend Valentine’s Day doing whatever your heart desires. Personally, I’ll most likely be taking the wine and popcorn Olivia Pope approach with a few Liz Lemon junk food binges throw in for good measure. However, be warned. As some of the entries prove, it’s possible to be unhealthily obsessed with your favorite thing. Treat yourself, friends.
The Show: Scandal
How does Olivia Pope have the energy to fix everything in the world? With the best snacking combo ever. Forget Fitz; this is Olivia's true love.
[Where to stream Scandal]
The Show: Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
Kimmy's enthusiasm for life in general is one of the most inspiring romances on streaming. Mole women can do anything!
[Where to stream Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt]
The Show: The Office
Dwight Schrute can be summed up in four words: bears, beets, Battlestar Galactica.
[Where to stream The Office]
The Show: House of Cards
There are few declarations of power more subtle and complete than Frank Underwood's definitive ring tap.
[Where to stream House of Cards]
The Show: 30 Rock
Liz Lemon has a lot of bad habits, but few worse than her obsession with junk food. Like her disappointing relationship with Dennis, she can't quit Meat Cat even though she knows it's bad for her.
[Where to stream 30 Rock]
The Show: Cheers
The best thing about Norm's relationship with just another drink is that it never seemed to end. However, that probably wasn't great for his liver.
[Where to stream Cheers]
The Movie: Wet Hot American Summer
There are always forbidden romances during summer camp, but few were as steamy as Gene's affair with the fridge. Get a walk-in freezer, you two.
[Where to stream Wet Hot American Summer]
The Show: The Wire
By far the most terrifying entry on the list, Snoop loved her nail gun of mass destruction so much that she kept it around even when it was leading the cops straight to her.
[Where to stream The Wire]
The Show: Bob's Burgers
We're bending the rules on this one since butts are technically a body part. However, Tina loves all butts equally, which isn't how she feels about people. Just butts.
[Where to stream Bob's Burgers]
The Show: Friends
The friends' unwavering loyalty to Central Perk for 10 seasons is truly noteworthy and should be the #Goals of any local business.
[Where to stream Friends]
The Movie: Forrest Gump
Bubba knew everything there was to know about shrimp, from boiling them to shrimp burgers. We're still not over his death, but Forrest's later dedication to shrimping cemented their friendship as one of our favorites.
[Where to stream Forrest Gump]
The Show: Doctor Who
Since the Tardis is kind of alive, we're picking the Sonic Screwdriver for our favorite Time Lord. It works on everything, except wood.
[Where to stream Doctor Who]
The Show: Kenan and Kel
Who loves orange soda? Kel loves orange soda. Is it true? You know the answer to that.
[Where to stream Kenan and Kel]
The Movies: The Star Wars universe
Forget Princess Leia, the heart of our favorite space scamp belongs to one thing and one thing only: the Millennium Falcon. Chewie, prepare to jump to lightspeed!
[Where to stream Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope]
The Show: The Sopranos
Our journey through Tony Soprano's life, breakdowns, and triumphs started with one thing: a flock of ducks. Just look at how happy he is.
[Where to stream The Sopranos]
The Show: Breaking Bad
For Walter White, his signature blue crystal blue meth represented several things: greed, power, wealth, purpose. But ultimately it was this object obsession that brought he and his family down.
[Where to stream Breaking Bad]
The Movies: The Lord of the Rings universe
There have been a lot of non-human romances on the list, but none have transformed their obsessors as completely as The One Ring transformed Smeagol. Or should we say Gollum.
[Where to stream The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring]
Photos: Everett Collection, Netflix, Amazon
