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Even if you absolutely despise Full House and Fuller House, I think we can all agree on one thing: John Stamos is hot. When Stamos was on Full House, his hotness took the form of the “bad boy” young rockstar that was the go-to symbol for danger on most 90’s sitcoms. Today, Stamos is 52 years old, but I don’t think time has realized that. Stamos is on the same aging path as Robert Downey Jr., which is to say that the years have just increased his attractiveness. In the grand scheme of the world, this is a very neat thing. For Fuller House? Stamos’ sexiness feels unintentionally creepy.
As I’ve mentioned before, I never loved Full House, but I did love to watch Stamos’ Uncle Jesse. He had a motorcycle, he was in a rock group, he had amazing hair, and, at the end of the day, he had a heart of gold. For me and my generation, Uncle Jesse, along with The Backstreet Boys and N*Sync, was one of those embarrassing crushes that you laugh at now but secretly still agree with. However, because of his age and his relationship with perma-dad Danny Tanner (Bob Saget), Uncle Jesse was a complicated crush. Sure, he had the irresponsible nature of a teenager, and Stamos was technically the same age as some 90’s “high school” actors, but Uncle Jesse was clearly a parent’s friend figure. That relationship in and of itself is awkward. The series smartly played with that dynamic through Kimmy Gibbler’s (Andrea Barber) crush on Jesse, but yeah. Stamos’ good looks were always the awkwardly sexy elephant in the family-friendly room.
Fast forward to present day, and holy moley. Stamos has definitely still got it, dudes. He is just a beautiful human, and we’re lucky we get to look at him. However, Stamos is back in the family-friendly game, both with Fuller House and his new sitcom Grandfathered, and as you probably already know, family and sexy don’t go well together. Which brings me to Fuller House. Stamos has some great chemistry with the series’ three leads, Candace Cameron Bure, Jodie Sweetin, and Andrea Barber, specifically Sweetin. But it takes you a minute to realize that it’s NOT the type of chemistry you want to see.
I’m not saying that the Full House flirtation vibe is intentional on the part of the writers or performers. It’s not at all. Everyone involved in the project has made it clear that this is a family-focused reboot, and Saget, Stamos, and Dave Coulier have all made comments that imply they see Cameron Bure, Sweetin, Barber, and the Olsen twins as family. But it still feels like Stamos is flirting with his nieces, and if my conversations with friends who have seen the show is any indication, I’m not (horribly) disturbed. There is a vibe. I think what’s going on is part industry ageism and part Stamos magnetism.
As Amy Schumer’s brilliant “Last F*ckable Day” sketch mocked, there is a problem in Hollywood when it comes to differently aged couples. If a 50-year-old actor’s love interest is a 30-year-old actress, we typically don’t think twice about the age discrepancy. I will go to my grave loving and crying over Sofia Coppola’s Lost in Translation, but when that movie was released, Bill Murray was 52 and Scarlett Johansson was 18. I know that age difference was a major theme in that movie, but it’s one line in the long narrative of our favorite unequally aged Hollywood couples. Seeing the sexy Stamos guest star alongside the show’s equally attractive leads sets up an expectation — an unfair and incorrect expectation for the actors and the show, but an expectation nonetheless. Then there’s Stamos himself.
In Community’s second season, Jeff Winger amazingly said “It’s called chemistry, I have it with everybody!” That’s Stamos. If you need proof, look no further than his appearance on Glee in “The Rock Horror Glee Show” (Season 2, Episode 5). P.S. His guest appearance gets bonus point for giving us the hilarious-to-watch jealous Will Schuester.
The point is, Stamos is just a charismatic person. But when you combine that charisma with 26 years of reverse beauty aging (seriously, what is the secret to this witchcraft), attractive co-stars, and a family-focused premise, the tone changes a little for the creepy. I don’t think there’s any way to change this. In the series, Uncle Jesse is happily married to the amazing Rebecca (Lori Loughlin) and has children of his own, Nicky and Alex (Blake and Dylan Tuomy-Wilhoit). However, Stamos’ charisma overpowers all of the series’ attempts to dad-ify him. I guess there is a cost to being too handsome.
