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No sitcom on television rivals the enduring comedic brilliance of It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. For twelve seasons, the disreputable group of misanthropes from Paddy’s Pub have delivered their own unique brand of incisive social commentary and trenchant humor while, remarkably, showing no signs of creative fatigue. It’s Always Sunny is a sitcom anomaly as it remains a fresh source of comedy despite producing over 130 episodes since 2005.
Throughout a bevy of hastily-crafted schemes and countless scrapes with the law, Sunny has developed a deep, deranged roster of incredibly enjoyable recurring characters: The McPoyle family, the Lawyer, Gail the Snail, and, of course, Rickety Cricket. Before Matthew “Rickety Cricket” Mara — masterfully portrayed by long-time Sunny writer/producer David Hornsby — reconnected with the Gang in Season 2’s “The Gang Exploits a Miracle,” he was a well-mannered Catholic priest with a Master’s in Theology. In Season 12’s “A Cricket’s Tale,” he’s a homeless street urchin who smokes PCP and makes out with Golden Retrievers.
How exactly did the Paddy’s 5 so thoroughly destroy poor young Matty Mara’s life? Let’s take a closer look at Rickety Cricket’s wickedly hilarious descent into comedic depravity.
'The Gang Exploits A Miracle' (S2E7): Successful Priest Matthew Mara
We’re first introduced to Matthew Mara in the Season 2 episode “The Gang Exploits a Miracle.”
A former high school classmate of the Gang’s, Mara is a Catholic priest who harbors a long-simmering crush on Sweet Dee. Despite a prolonged history of being tormented physically by Mac and Dennis (in the form of constant tea-bagging) and mentally by Dee (she once promised to kiss him if he ate a horse turd), Mara decides to quit the priesthood after Dee confesses that she has romantic feelings for him.
Turns out, Dee was only flirting with Mara after being manipulated into doing so by Frank and the Gang. So begins Cricket’s insane decent into madness.
Rickety Cricket’s Decent into Depravity: After discovering he quit the priesthood for nothing, Cricket gains a sliver of revenge for the years of torment by tea-bagging Dennis.
'The Gang Gets Whacked: Part 2' (S3E13): Homeless Street Urchin
Things went south in a hurry for poor Rickety Cricket.
Homeless but still in love with Deandra, he agrees to sell Charlie and Dee’s coke in exchange for a chance to crash at Ms. Reynolds’ apartment. Shockingly, this does not turn out well as he develops an addiction to cocaine and has his legs broken by drug dealers.
Hidden Rickety Cricket Talents: Turning trashcans into kettledrums, writing sexy musicals
Stream 'The Gang Gets Whacked: Part 2' on Netflix Breaks Dee's kneecaps. "Quotable Cricket:
'The Gang Dances Their Asses Off' (S3E15): Rickety Cricket Has Bionic Legs
“Fueled by vengeance and reinforced with space-age technology,” Cricket returns to Paddy’s Pub sporting enhanced artificial legs, which ultimately fail him when he challenges Mac to a dance-off.
Quotable Cricket: “I want these guys, Frank. I WANT THEM. I will stalk the streets and live in the shadows of the night until the streets of Philadelphia run red with their blood.”
Rickety Cricket’s Decent into Depravity: Makes drug-filled brownies, shatters Dee’s kneecaps
'Mac and Dennis: Manhunters' (S4E1): Dennis And Mac Hunt Rickety Cricket
It’s Always Sunny has concocted such a wonderfully demented universe that Mac and Dennis’ decision to hunt a fellow human being for sport actually seems like the next logical step in the ill-fated journey of Rickety Cricket.
Despite showcasing a bevy of street-savvy defensive maneuvers, the episode concludes on a “the more things change, the more they stay the same” note, and by that I mean it ends with Cricket getting tea-bagged.
'The Gang Wrestles for the Troops' (S5E7): Cricket Gets This Throat Slashed
Cricks obtains a modicum of revenge on the Gang when his professional wrestling alter ego, The Talibum, whacks Dee with a steel chair and kicks Dennis in the face. As with most (all) of Cricket’s victories, this one is short-lived as the episode concludes with Philly’s favorite street rat lying in a pool of his own blood.
Rickety Cricket’s Decent into Depravity: Busts Dee’s nose by hitting her with a steel chair, unpatriotic behavior, questionable professional wrestling tactics, interrupts a performance of “Kiss From a Rose”
'Mac's Big Break' (S6E4): Random Dogs Attempt To Have Sex With Cricket's Neck Wound
While appearing on Dennis and Dee’s podcast, Cricket’s asked to walk the listeners through a random day in his life. Say what you will about our misfortunate man of maladies, the guy makes an enthralling talk show guest.
Quotable Cricket: “The other morning I wake up, and I find a dog sniffing at my wound. He’s fully aroused, mind you. So I’m thinking, ‘Oh great. What does this jerk want?'”
Cricket Discoveries of the Episode: He has an infected wound on his neck from when Frank struck him with a trash can; he no longer believes in god; random dogs try to have sex with the hole in his neck; he will appear on your podcast for a rotisserie chicken, and he sucks on lemons to stave off scurvy.
'The Storm Of The Century' (S7E6): Frank Shoots Cricket
After a brief appearance in the Season 6 episode “Dee Gives Birth” (in which he can be seen smoking crack), Cricket’s laundry list of calamities continue into Sunny’s seventh season.
Believing Cricket to be a looter during a potentially devastating storm, Frank shoots a hole through the former priest’s hand.
Rickety Cricket’s Decent into Depravity: Cricket incites a riot by driving Frank’s Cadillac into a department store.
'The High School Reunion' (S7E13): Cricket Has Ringworm
In the beginning of Season 7’s two-part finale, it appears as though our old friend Cricket has found salvation. No more crack. No more stray dog neck sex. Matthew Mara has rejoined the church and is once again a man of the cloth.
But not really.
Turns out it was all just one big ruse by ol’ Cricks so he could steal from his former classmates. When his duplicity is revealed, we also discover that Rickety suffers from a severe case of ringworm.
'Pop-Pop: The Final Solution' (S08E01): Cricket Becomes A Dog Janitor
Welp, Matty Mara went from extolling the virtues of the Catholic Church to a dog janitor with only one working eye.
After a dog-related altercation leaves him scarred and without the use of his left eye, Cricket is forced into performing community service at the local pound. Initially, he cheerfully agrees to let Dee and Dennis choose a puppy to put down (because they want to feel what it’s like to take a life, naturally), but, instead, they decide to set a pack of wild dogs (and Cricket) free.
Quotable Cricket: “I got into a skirmish with a stray Chocolate Lab. I won’t go into details, but suffice to say that dog is very paralyzed now.”
'The Gang Squashes Their Beefs' (S9E10): Cricket Gets Part Of His Face Burned Off
Wanting to squash their myriad beefs, the Gang decide to host a Thanksgiving dinner in order to put an end to all their simmering feuds. Though not invited, Cricket shows up in hopes of nibbling on some of the food scraps.
Once again, this man was once a well-adjusted Catholic Priest.
After he debates giving Mac and Dennis his one good eye, Cricket gets a hatchet buried in his arm and is left with permanent facial disfigurement after being left for dead inside a burning apartment. Happy Thanksgiving!
Quotable Cricket:
Cricket: C’mon, guys. Let me stay. I’ll eat the gristle.
Dennis: You can eat it off the floor like a dog. How about that?
Cricket: I don’t mind. Woof woof, baby.
'Psycho Pete Returns' (S10E3): Cricket Is Definitely A Prostitute Now
Badly disfigured from the events of his last appearance, aka being locked inside a burning apartment, Mac and Charlie track down Cricket and ask him to absolve the sins of their friend Psycho Pete.
While the episode is notable for the revelation that Cricket is now an amateur prostitute, the recurring joke that the Gang has absolutely no recollection of the horrible events that led to Cricket’s mutilation is Sunny at its subversive, self-obsessed best.
Quotable Cricket: “Oh, we got drugs? Alright, crank me up, baby. We goin’ up? Down? How we doin’ this?”
'Dee Made A Smut Film' (S11E4): Cricket Was In A Dog Orgy
The Gang once again rope their hapless pal into one of their schemes of the week.
This Season 11 episode finds Cricket posing as an artist as Mac attempts to expose the folly of the art community. Charlie transforms Cricket’s stories, which are mostly just ramblings about dog orgies, into paintings.
“I call this one ‘Dog Threeway,'” Cricket explains. “Because I was recently in a dog threeway. Actually, four with me. So fourway. I was in a dog orgy.”
Random Cricket Malady: A cat has bitten off one of his toes.
'A Cricket's Tale' (S12E9): Cricket Smokes PCP And Smooches A Dog
The beginning of the episode finds Cricket one jump ahead of a local merchant as he swipes a piece of bread, only to end up falling into a dumpster filled with manure, which at this point, is honestly the least of Crick’s concerns.
Much like Season 7’s “The High School Reunion,” viewers are teased with the possibility of Cricket finding redemption when his dad offers him a job in the family business. Featuring flashbacks from this season’s “PTSDee” episode (in which Cricket was a stripper), the surprisingly spry street rat seemingly finds love when he begins a brief romance with a co-worker named Belle, that is until you remember that you’re watching It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia.
Turns out Cricket is just high on PCP and Belle, whom he’d been making out with, is his dad’s golden retriever.
Bonus Cricket Fun Fact: He often showers in a leaky urinal and currently has only one kidney.
