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The week that Donald Trump won the presidential election, Saturday Night Live opened the following Saturday’s show with Kate McKinnon, as Hillary Clinton, singing the Leonard Cohen classic “Hallelujah.” Cohen had died that week, but the tribute to him was secondary. The performance was an elegy, mourning the long-hoped for, now dead, possibility of a second President Clinton, and a first female president for our country. But in a broader sense, the song was a collective wail for the end of an ideal – the notion that American was ever-broadening in its demographic, open in its veins of expression, and welcoming of an endless array of differences regarding how people live their lives.
The cold open for the season finale, the conclusion of a year that saw Donald Trump swallow the collective American consciousness whole – including, to a large extent, SNL‘s output – put a button on this idea. Opening with Alec Baldwin as Trump, sitting at Hillary’s piano, singing “Hallelujah,” as his family and associates – including Scarlett Johansson returning as his daughter Ivanka – surrounded him to join in, was a musical proclamation that the transformation of Trump’s America was now complete. It’s Donald’s world now – we’re just living with it.
It’s hard to tell if the studio audience immediately caught the reference to the post-election episode – they were mostly quiet as the song started, though that could have been by request – but I found it powerful. Whichever side of the political divide you’re on, this has been a rough, emotional year for most of us. Watching Baldwin and those who played his inner circle singing a song of deep meaning in the very place and style their own Hillary doppelganger had drove home the depth of the change our country has undergone. It was a far better choice for the season ending cold open than another Trump in the White House sketch would have been, and a smart way to say goodbye to a year of unprecedented change.
And speaking of change – here’s 2020 presidential candidate Dwayne Johnson! Well, maybe – Johnson floated the idea last week that he might run for president in 2020, but first, he had a more pressing new endeavor, as Baldwin came out to welcome Johnson to SNL‘s Five-Timers club, making him the third new member this season (after Johansson and Melissa McCarthy).
But Johnson’s presidential speculation was too prominent to ignore. He mentioned to Baldwin that people have been asking him to run, and he announced his candidacy, adding that he’s already chosen his running mate, and that it was another member of the Five-Timers Club. Cue Baldwin looking touched and flattered, then horrified as Johnson brought out his choice – Tom Hanks, also in his Five-Timers jacket.
Johnson joked that at this point, he might actually be over qualified for the office, and Hanks added, “America needs us.” Maybe he’s right. He also says if they ran, they would get 100 percent of the vote. Not sure he’s right about that, but could they win? During “Weekend Update,” Colin Jost told a joke about a real new poll showing that if the election were held today, Johnson would beat Trump. Hmmm…
Johnson ends the monologue by disclaiming that he’s only joking, and then unveils a serious presidential soundbite about the need for serious leadership. This monologue did nothing to dissuade me from the belief that Johnson is giving serious thought to running in 2020.
Next comes a commercial parody for a Cartier Fidget Spinner. Vanessa Bayer – who announced yesterday that she’s leaving the show after this episode- and Beck Bennett play a couple at a upscale party. The voice-over, accompanied by a violin, intones – in a “this is a commercial for a classy, expensive product” voice – “You love her. You cherish her. But let’s face it – she’s…a lot.” The commercial then paints a picture of Bayer’s character as an attractive, exciting flake, the type of person who can’t focus on life but you date because, as the announcer says, god, the sex is good, even though the person as a whole is a disaster. “You give her the sun, the moon and the stars, But for now…give her something to distract her.” A fidget spinner with diamonds – for the high-class flake in your life. “Designed to calm her, because she, quote, has anxiety.”
The first sketch saw the return of Bobby Moynihan, also in his final episode of SNL, and Johnson as wrestlers filming a promo for an upcoming match, with Johnson getting way too personal for a wrestling promo – since he hacked into Moynihan’s computer to spy on him to find dirt to use for the promo. A funny bit smartly kept short, by the end, Moynihan learns that Johnson is his secret brother, and the father to his unborn child. It’s appropriate they brought this back tonight, since its Moynihan’s last episode. It was funny enough to bring back once, but probably wouldn’t have worked a third time.
Next came a hip-hop video with the problem of too many MC’s. This sketch, appropriate for a season-ender, was an excuse to have the entire cast create ridiculous, over-the-top hip-hop personas, and they clearly had a blast with this, as Kenan Thompson’s Big Chris tries to corral the never-ending roster of MCs infringing on his track. Some of the stranger creations: Mikey Day as nerdcore rapper Sno’Cone; Alex Moffat as the way out-of-character white trash rapper Lil’ Nitwit; Colin Jost and Michael Che as ’80s rejects 2 Black Guys; Cecily Strong as juggalo Hawt Clown; Kate McKinnon as pregnant rapper Pregnasty; Beck Bennett as fop Essentially Simon; and Hanks as, who else, David S. Pimpkins. I’d love to see the show do more like this in the future.
Johnson then plays a superhero called Scorpio. He explains his new super power to colleague Strong, but despite the city being in danger, she simply can’t get over how he made his superhero suit himself. It’s a funny take on how superheroes like Spider-Man seem to acquire exquisite design and tailoring skills along with their other powers. As Sasheer Zamata, playing another colleague, says, “Being a superhero is a skill, but designing is a talent.”
Next comes the return of Strong’s Gemma, a British women with a crude mate in Johnson, who can’t stop insulting any other women in his presence. The sketch, which finds them meeting couple Thompson and Bayer on a ride at Universal, becomes an excuse for Bayer to be sprayed with water. This sketch gave no reason to bring it back last time it ran, and there was nothing new or funny here. The first downside to a promising episode so far.
Next, Johnson plays a man in an ad for an erectile dysfunction drug that’s not exactly on the up and up – it’s probably a blend of steroids and meth. Johnson goes through the motions we see in many similar ads, including asking his doctor, Kyle Mooney, about the drug. The doctor tells him not to take this drug under any circumstances – you could die, he says – but Johnson isn’t having it, and ends up tossing him around the office. Not sure this had much of a point beyond “drugs are bad, m’kay,” but it was worth a few laughs.
A lackluster Weekend Update produced few jokes worth repeating, save for Jost comparing Trump giving a speech on Islam in Saudi Arabia (as he will today) to “Mike Pence giving a toast at a gay wedding.” Bayer brought back her character from a few weeks ago of the weather reporter who speaks in gibberish due to nerves. It wasn’t funny the first time, and I’m not sure why they brought it back, especially as Bayer’s goodbye to Update. I can only guess it was at her request, since, when Che mentions surprise at her return because it didn’t work great the first time, she says, in her gibberishy way, “It’s that last show and I, gonna sneak that in.”
A better goodbye came from Moynihan, who returned for his final Drunk Uncle as an SNL cast member. Perfectly in keeping with previous outings, Moynihan’s creation reveled in Trump’s election. Among his funnier lines: “Finally, a white guy has a chance to make it in America again.” “Here’s an Instagram story: Go to church.” “You can’t even call it a Nintendo Switch anymore. You call it Caitlyn.” “One time, I asked a fidget to spin and she said the current term is ‘little person.'” “Ghostbusters should be men!” After Jost threw to commercial, he and Moynihan hugged.
Next came a 1940s film shoot, with Johnson and Bayer as actors of the time. Bayer is a star with a problem – she can’t stop farting during her scenes. Special notice here to SNL‘s sound crew, who made some creative choices for fart noises. This was a silly mess and a delight all at once. Johnson and Bayer broke several times, and by the end, I was surprised to find myself laughing harder at this than anything else in the episode.
The next sketch is the annual meeting of the International Mad Scientist Society, gathering to hold the annual Most Evil Invention in the World contest. Mooney’s evil scientist has invented a shrink ray; Sasheer Zamata has a freeze ray. Then, Johnson’s Roy – who looks less evil on his face – takes the prize with a child molesting robot. The other inventors are horrified. This dark sketch shows the folly of old “evil” characters – with nonsense like freeze rays – as Johnson counters the objections of the other scientists by reminding them what “evil” is. The sketch takes a weird, safe turn at the end, positioning itself as a fake ad for White Castle, but if SNL‘s gonna go dark, it should stick to its guns.
The next sketch finds Johnson and Strong in a bar, with Bennett as the bartender. Strong sits alone, and Johnson is shy – Bennett volunteers to play wingman. But he’s got a different agenda, and tries to arrange a threesome. The rest of the sketch finds Johnson and Bennett negotiating various arrangements. There wasn’t much here, but it was a fine quick take.
The final sketch finds Moynihan, Bayer, Bennett and Mooney playing high school seniors, doing a special performance to commemorate the end of the year. They do awkward takes on pop culture phenomenon – Deadpool, Stranger Things, the Best Picture Oscar mix-up – and while the sketch had potential, especially since it was really a goodbye for Moynihan and Bayer, it was literally half-formed, lacking an ending.
During the goodbyes, Johnson reminded the crowd to vote Johnson/Hanks in 2020, but said nothing about Moynihan and Bayer leaving, which was surprising. Time will tell who else is going.
Thanks for reading. Have a funny summer.
Larry Getlen is the author of the book Conversations with Carlin. His greatest wish is to see Stefon enjoy a cheeseburger at John Belushi’s diner. Follow him on Twitter at @larrygetlen.
