Watch Out–’Fuller House’ Season 3 Is Somehow Zanier Than Ever

How do you out-crazy crazy? That is the question the mad sorcerers behind Fuller House have to answer every time Netflix demands a new batch of episodes be conjured up. How do you follow Stephanie (Jodie Sweetin) performing at Coachella as DJ Tanner? Or DJ (Candace Cameron Bure) getting into a wrestling ring? Kimmy Gibbler (Andrea Barber) performing in The Nutcracker? Or even just throwaway gags, like Cosmo the dog wearing sunglasses for literally no reason? How do you out-crazy crazy?

With the arrival of the rest of Fuller House Season 3 on Friday (the first half dropped back in late September), viewers will see the most surreal sitcom of the 21st century take its brightly-colored lunacy to a whole new level… by exporting it to a whole new country. Yep, in the Season 3B premiere episode, the Fuller/Tanner/Gibblers conquer Japan like a no-cursing kaiju.

The premiere episode given to the press early is actually the 10th episode of Season 3, but also the first episode in this new batch–like all things Fuller House, just go with it. In fact, “just go with it” is the mantra to repeat in your head while watching this show, otherwise it may break your brain.

This show is beyond analysis as it is thoroughly unconcerned with being analyzed. It exists, hurtling from punchlines to hijinks with a bewitching efficiency. The show has only gained more confidence to be bizarre as the seasons roll by, and nothing–certainly not a review–is going to make this show stop indulging its most cloying tendencies. Fuller House is as certain of what it is and what it is doing as The Good Place, so either join the She Wolf Pack or smell ya later.

Three seasons into this TGIF revival and you, dear reader, already know whether or not this show is for you. That’s why a review of this show can no longer try to sell it or pan it based on inconsequential things like “story” or “performances.” The only thing that I can really judge Fuller House on is whether or not it still delivers moments that make me call someone over to my desk to make sure what I’m seeing is actually happening and not a sign that I am losing my grip on reality.

By that metric, Fuller House‘s premiere episode MORE. THAN. DELIVERS. Without getting heavily into spoilers, as I imagine there are Fuller family fans that actually care about DJ’s love triangle, here’s a list of the craziest things to happen in the Fuller House premiere. If any of these moments have you saying, “Wait, no, they did what?”–then this might just be the show for you.

• Coinciding with the show’s trip to Japan, the theme song was translated to Japanese
• Uncle Jesse (John Stamos) rides horseback and flirts with a fairy in a Japanese cologne commercial
• Kimmy and Fernando (Juan Pablo Di Pace) perform a disco Kabuki routine that is every bit as “Yep, they went there” as that sounds
• A talking bilingual toilet eats a dress
• One-fifth of the Japanese boy band Sezy Zone saves a cast member’s life
• DJ engages in a lengthy wrestling match with 100-year-old koi fish (the fish has 3 million Instagram followers)

That’s it. That’s the show.

If you have to see how all of that zaniness (and trust me, plenty more) is crammed into a 40-minute sitcom adventure, then set aside some time on Friday for Fuller House. If not, move along, but know you will live life having never seen a bilingual toilet eat a dress.

Fuller House returns, crazier than ever, on Netflix on December 22.

Where to stream Fuller House