Fun
Frisky
Nostalgic
Intense
Adventurous
Choked Up
Curious
Romantic
Weird
‘Tis the season for keeping things both warm and bubbly, and what better way to celebrate than to soak up cinema’s Top 10 hottest hot tub scenes from days of olde…
(Don’t worry gang, we’re going to spare you any Kathy Bates/About Schmidt love here!)
'Halloween II' (1981)
Haddonfield Memorial Hospital’s resident nurse (Pamela Susan Shoop) and EMT (Leo Rossi) decide to try a little sexual therapy when they turn the hydrotherapy pool into a kinky hot tub. Unfortunately for them, Michael Myers —up to his old tricks again!— turns up the heat on the sudsy couple and treats himself to being their angel of death. But hey, at least they had some lovely dirty-clean fun before being discharged from the hospital for good!
'Madman' (1982)
Wait, they made a Madman movie?? Oh the horror! Exactly/not Exactly. There’s no Don Draper to be found here, but Donnie Boy would probably enjoy the break in the murder action the movie provides when lovebirds Gaylen Ross and Tony Fish take a super romantic dip in a hot tub in a cabin in the woods. Sometimes things go bump in the night, and sometimes things go HUMP in the night!
'Hollywood Hot Tubs' (1984)
Before Hot Tub Time Machine cornered the market on hot tub movies, there was 1984’s Hollywood Hot Tubs. And from what we can glean from both the poster and trailer, and the fact that it spawned a sequel (1990’s Hollywood Hot Tubs 2: Educating Crystal), we can guarantee that this is THE ultimate hot tub film. Too bad it’s only streaming on a VCR.
'Back To School' (1986)
‘Hey, what’s a bath without bubbles? Hey Bubbles, come over here, will ya?’—Thornton Melon, budding marine biology student
'Ferris Bueller's Day Off' (1986)
The only thing better than ’80s Mia Sara is WET ’80s Mia Sara!
'Ski School' (1991)
When the guy from Summer School and that guy from Heathers and a guy who looks like Boner from ‘Growing Pains’ enroll in Ski School, all bets are off (and, in some cases, tops too)! Surprises lurk around every corner of the campus, and especially at the hot tub, where the ladies always seem to be having such a ball.
'Austin Powers: International Man Of Mystery' (1997)
Hot tubs are hubs for extreme relaxation, and who wouldn’t be at ease with Alotta Fagina (Fabiana Udenio) cleaning your back, serving you sake, and being slightly OK with having you break wind before her (Austin Powers didn’t know it was her turn)!
'Eurotrip' (2004)
As dumb as this movie is, it sports an impressive supporting cast (Matt Damon, Fred Armisen, Jeffrey Tambor), and an impressive pair of performances by Molly Schade and the hot tub that she makes even hotter.
'The Lion King 1 1/2'
So maybe animals or cartoons is your fetish – well, the direct-to-video crap-uel The Lion King 1½ is here to help satisfy all your, um, uh, needs? WTF? [insert Pumbaa farting noise here]
'Hot Tub Time Machine' (2010)
We’d be remiss if we didn’t include Hot Tub Time Machine on this list. Not because it has the words ‘hot tub’ in its title, but because Jessica Paré makes quite the splash IN one, and makes all who watch her wonderful work here go zou bisou bisou bonkers!!!
Thighmaster is full time master of thighs, and editor-in-CHEF of ThighsWideShut.org, an organization based out of Thighland. In his free time he eats fried chicken, and runs street teams to promote the greatness of David Fincher’s Zodiac, and the greatness of the Zardoz trailer.
