Why It’s Important ‘Real Housewives’ Is Talking About Erika Jayne’s Period

Once again, The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills has us talking about Erika Jayne’s vagina. But this time, it’s for a much more important reason: instead of last season’s pantygate, this year we’re in the middle of periodgate.

Two weeks ago, as the women arrived at Teddi’s beach house for a quick getaway, Erika mentioned she was having a horrendous period, noting, “I’m feeling like my uterus is being pulled through my…” throwing one arm over her head while she used the other to sip on a cup of tea. “When you’ve got a bad period, it’s the worst,” Dorit lamented. “Psychosomatically, I’m actually started to feel your pain,” she said. We were also provided with a shot of Erika flopped on the bed, made up of all white linens, in her comfy, flowy, menstruation-appropriate outfit. This woman had her period and she had it bad.

At the time, it felt like an interesting and notable quirk that we even got that much of Erika talking about her period so openly and seemingly relatably. But in true Housewives fashion, it was all just foreshadowing for this week’s episode.

We join the women the next morning and learn that Erika excused herself from the house and went to stay at a hotel instead. Dorit and Kyle bicker about who ended up with Erika’s abandoned room, and when Erika walks into the room, she’s met with an awkward silence. Dorit steps up to fill her in on the gossip, as she’s learned her damn lesson and never wants to stray from Erika’s good side. Although she does subject Erika to her offensively all-white outfit — including tight white jeans, the fashion equivalent of bragging about your current lack of period — as Dorit reveals the women discussed Erika’s departure at length the night before. A flashback to the previous day shows us Erika saying, “I’m having the worst period of my entire life. I feel like I’m dying.”

And yet! The women felt her leaving to stay at a hotel was “weird.” They could not wrap their minds around Erika feeling sick enough to excuse herself, with Lisa Vanderpump even saying, “I’m a woman, I’ve dealt with stomach cramps a million times. I don’t quite understand why she needs to check into the hotel.” The conversation actually got pushed to a point where Erika had to explain, “I didn’t want to bleed all over your sheets,” in the plainest of terms possible. She even went on to say, “I actually checked into the DoubleTree, took a shower and went to sleep.” The DoubleTree. Think about that. This is a Four Seasons woman: if she’s checking into the DoubleTree, it’s not just for fun, it’s dire.

These women have no intentions of dropping this (and it will surely take up a chunk of this season’s reunion), to the point where Erika dabs at her tears while admitting, “It’s fucking embarrassing. It’s just gross.” This is a 46-year-old woman, one who has presumably been going through this process for over 30ish years, who is still feeling awkward about her period. There’s nothing about that time of the month that is fun; but to have a room full of women not believe she was as sick as she is, and shame her for wanting to escape to some privacy for it…What the fuck?

The fact that Erika showed up to the beach house adventure AT ALL is big on her part. Any woman who has ever had a regular to horrible period knows all they want to do is curl up in the fetal position and either throw up or place their face in the middle of a chocolate cake. It’s a terrible yet true cliché. If Erika had a stuffy nose or a cough, you’d understand her sickness. But one of the most unfair parts of being a woman is that we can’t fully explain (or transfer) the pain of cramps to others (especially men).

Being anywhere other than your own home during this time is uncomfortable. Here is a short list of potential problems Erika had to worry about for the one-night stay: bleeding on the ALL WHITE sheets; or the towels; or running out of toilet paper; or filling the bathroom garbage can with the waste that comes along with that week. And she had to do this, all while attempting to feel healthy enough to deal with a hostile group of women.

If she had stayed, she still probably would’ve been spending more time in the bathroom or the bed feeling bloated and irritable and uncomfortable, rather than sitting outside on a moon-lit beach with a glass of rosé in her hand. The only conversation the women should’ve been having in her absence is “OMG is she ok and does she have enough Advil and snacks?”

The lack of empathy from these women was astonishing. It’s girl code to understand that if a woman says she’s having a bad period, you believe her. Because in all honesty, it was way more embarrassing for Erika to have to admit that she needed to leave than it was offensive of her to do so.

Her departure proved to be an unnecessary source of drama, but it did lead to a more important discussion. On a show like Real Housewives, with female viewers in the majority, it shouldn’t be so weird when periods are discussed — and it certainly shouldn’t be met with questioning or judgment. In fact, it’s a bit surprising that menstruation isn’t discussed more on the franchise, from serious to snide remarks.

Perhaps ultimately, no woman truly wants to talk about it, but if there were ever going to be one, of course it would be the Queen Erika Jayne. Hopefully in the future there’s less shaming, and more supporting.

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