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Truly, what is a movie without music? Even before technology reached a point where sounds could sync up with the moving pictures, silent movie theaters employed piano players to provide the visuals with live accompaniment. Sights and sounds, they go together like life and love. And as the medium has progressed through the decades, we’ve seen this partnership of seeing and hearing evolve into exciting new combinations. Original scores evolved from those plinky player pianos, as did original songs performed by balladeers and pop stars alike. When movies meet music, magic happens.
To celebrate this harmonious cinematic partnership of eyes and ears, Decider’s Joe Reid and Brett White have come together for a thought-provoking discussion about the art of movie music and to shine a light on the classic compositions that exemplify the beauty of story and song.
Brett White: So, Joe, I don’t know if you’re aware of this unequivocally true fact, but “Techno Syndrome (Mortal Kombat)” by The Immortals from the 1995 film Mortal Kombat is the greatest song from a feature film of all time.
Joe Reid: Okay, slow down. That is a lot to unpack at once on a Monday. First of all, yes, obviously “Techno Syndrome (Mortal Kombat)” is a jam. It’s a reminder that in 1995 we were so awash in superb movie soundtracks that we could have a hit club banger straight out of a video-game-to-mediocre-action-movie adaptation and the entire marketplace would be like, “Yes, this is right and appropriate. Can we get the Vengaboys on that Street Fighter soundtrack ASAP?” The 1990s were a magical time for movie soundtracks, from Baz Luhrmann’s William Shakespeare’s Romeo + Juliet to Empire Records to the dad-comforting classic rock of Forrest Gump. ‘90s soundtracks were so huge that you never even had to hear about the movie for the songs to be huge hits. You’ve never seen the Jason Patric/Jennifer Jason Leigh heroin romp Rush, and neither have I, but Eric Clapton is maybe STILL at #1 on the charts with “Tears in Heaven.”
That said … the Mortal Kombat theme as the best of not only the ‘90s but of all time? You’re going to have to convince me.
BW: The Mortal Kombat theme has a guy yelling “MORTAL KOMBAT” in it, shouted with so much vigor that you can practically hear the snatched spine of his foe jangling from his clenched fist. It’s the best movie song of all time.
JR: Point … taken, I suppose. Here’s the thing: if the question is “What’s the song most likely to get you to bark out loud “Liu Kang!” and “SONYA!” during your workout, then, yes, Mortal Kombat is your guy. But … there are a LOT of songs out there for MK to defeat in order to ascend that mountain.
Whitney Houston’s “I Will Always Love You” from The Bodyguard, to name but one example, spent 14 weeks at number one and is one of the defining songs in the career of one of the defining voices in pop music. It’s instantly recognizable and manages to build upon Dolly Parton’s original, which is an incredibly difficult thing to so. It made people have romantic feelings for Kevin Costner in one of his all-time worst haircuts. It is iconic.
BW: The Mortal Kombat theme sounds like totally jacked anthropomorphic lasers in a dance-off at a dojo that also hosts raves. It’s the best movie song of all time.
JR: The Bee Gees’ “Staying Alive” pretty much defined an entire era of music in Saturday Night Fever, and put such a stamp on that movie that the sequel was CALLED Staying Alive!
BW: The Mortal Kombat theme urges the listener to “test your might” no fewer than 30 times in three-and-a-half minutes. It’s the best movie song of all time.
JR: The Mortal Kombat theme begins with a gong, which is OBJECTIVELY RACIST. Also, “White Christmas” is the best-selling song in history and carved a place for itself in the heart of American Christmas tradition, despite being most famously performed by an alcoholic who beat his kids!
BW: Bing Crosby might croon the words “white Christmas” in “White Christmas,” but he never once shouts so hard you can feel the spittle hit your eardrums. The Mortal Kombat theme is the best movie song of all time.
JR: At one point in the Mortal Kombat theme, the guy says “Excellent!” seventeen times in a row! Also “Flashdance (What a Feeling)” is a GOODAMN BOP AND YOU KNOW IT, BRETT!
BW: The Mortal Kombat theme–pardon me, it’s called “Techno Syndrome”–does listeners a service by repeatedly reminding us who is in the movie. Where is the “Alex, Nick, Hanna, Jeanie, Richie” part of the Flashdance theme? The Mortal Kombat theme is the best movie song of all time.
JR: Okay, I am forced to give you credit for name-checking all of the characters in Flashdance.
That said, the Mortal Kombat theme doesn’t even name-check Kitana or Mileena, the two best characters for girls and gay boys to play as, making the song IRREDEEMABLY MISOGYNIST AND HOMOPHOBIC, and also Aaliyah’s “Are You That Somebody” exists and is the only reason we remember Eddie Murphy made a Doctor Doolittle movie, and also she performed in that video with a FALCON, case closed.
BW: I don’t know how a song can be misogynist or homophobic when you know it has been the soundtrack to many, many hot grindage sessions. It’s all about bringing people together, sweatily. You hear this song, and you want to challenge someone else’s pelvis to a duel to the death. Metaphorical death, but a literal duel. The Mortal Kombat theme is the best movie song of all time.
JR: Can we at least agree that “All For One (All for Love)” from the Three Musketeers soundtrack, is the second-best movie song of all time?
BW: Third best, after “Fight to Survive” from Bloodsport.
