‘The Young Offenders’ Will Remind You A Bit Of ‘The Goonies’ (If You Swap Cocaine For Pirate Treasure)

“There are two things you need for a good adventure — a treasure map, and someone dumb enough to go with you.” This bit of narration early in The Young Offenders, an award-winning 2016 Irish comedy film now available on Netflix, sets the tone for a bawdy, foul-mouthed, hilarious, and oddly sweet tale of two dirtbag teenagers on a mission.

Conor and Jock, the co-starring protagonists of our story, don’t have a lot, but they have each other — and a truly terrible plan. They’re 15 years old — too young to be prosecuted for crimes as adults, as referenced in the movie’s title — and not dedicated to much other than antisocial behavior and small-time mischief. Jock, the brash, outgoing one, is a recreational bike thief in their hometown of Cork. He commits his petty crimes while wearing a mask that makes him look like the town’s most prominent minor criminal, Billy Murphy, on security cameras – earning him slight notoriety as “Fake Billy”. Conor, the shy, pensive one, adores his pal Jock, much to his mother’s consternation. He mimics his best friend in every way possible — dress, haircut, gait, and even a similarly poor attempt at growing a teenage mustache.

They’re knuckleheads, the pair, but they’re knuckleheads with pathos; both are the product of difficult family situations, each having lost a parent. Conor’s single mother struggles to support him, but she’s weary, angry, and overworked; Jock’s recently-widowed father is an alcoholic who steals from his son. Neither of the parents are outright villains, but they’re not the steadying figures that these kids need. Really, no one cares much about them or their mischief, save for Healy — a local cop who’s become obsessed with catching the mysterious Fake Billy, against the resistance of his superiors.

This all changes when the boys hear the news that a drug smuggling ship has run aground on the nearby coast, spilling bundles of cocaine worth hundreds of millions of Euro along the beach. Jock believes this is going to be their ticket out of boring, bleak lives; they’re going to recover the illicit cargo and graduate to a life of luxurious excess. “This time tomorrow we could be millionaires,” he declares, selling his sidekick on the plan. “You could have everything you ever wanted – mansions, cars, caves and tits.” He steals the boys a couple of bikes — unbeknownst to them, one bears a GPS tracker placed by Healy — and they set off down the coastline to find their treasure.

“Ignorance really is bliss, and right then we had shitloads of it,” Conor notes in a voiceover. I won’t spoil everything happens along their journey, but it’s a hilarious sequence of twists and turns, of near-captures and lucky escapes, culminating in a terrific and satisfying third act. There are moments that betray the childish innocence of these wannabe narcos — times where the kind hearts under their posturing exterior show through — and where that kindness ends up putting them in real danger. At heart, it’s a road trip caper and a coming-of-age story, one worthy of The Goonies or Stand By Me — but instead of buried treasure or a dead body, they’re seeking kilograms of cocaine.

“When you’ve got only one thing on your mind, it can be hard to think clearly,” Conor says, sounding a bit like Ferris Bueller, “but if you stop and open your eyes, just for a moment, you’d be amazed at what you might see.” Reflecting later on their failed parents, the relentless Healy, and his and Jock’s own troubles, he laments, “I think sometimes people do the opposite of what they should do when they’re lonely. They hide away at work, they fight with the people they miss the most, and they turn to the bottle instead of picking up the phone.”

The movie’s premise is actually based on a real-life event in Ireland in 2007, when an inflatable raft piloted by drug smugglers overturned and dumped bales of cocaine into the waters off Mizen Head in County Cork. (If anyone set out on a pair of stolen bicycles to recover it is unknown). The movie was a big success in Ireland and the UK, garnering critical praise, a handful of awards, and was even adapted into a BBC television series starring most of the same cast. It’s easy to see why – it’s an absolute riot, and unlike some foreign comedies, it doesn’t feel like much is lost in translating the cultural references as an American viewer. Running a tight 85 minutes, it doesn’t overstay its welcome or lag in the second half, either — it’s lively from start to finish.

It’s fortunate that our current boom era of streaming services can give second life to foreign films like this, ones that audiences stateside might otherwise have missed. This is a film with local focus but a universal story at its core. We may not relate to some of the specific nuances of Irish life, but weren’t we all dirtbag teens once?

Scott Hines is an architect, blogger and internet user who lives in Louisville, Kentucky with his wife, two young children, and a small, loud dog.

Where to stream The Young Offenders