‘House II’ on Prime Video: ‘the Second Story’ Delivers All the Swashbuckling John Ratzenberger Action You Desire

Halloween gives all of us a chance to try on a different persona, one that—to the possible surprise of others—might unleash a newer and truer side of ourselves. How many of us have taken on the swagger of the superhero we’re dressed up as, or let wearing a scary mask give us permission to startle everyone? The same can be said for actors, who take on horror movie roles that let them do things straightforward comedies and dramas don’t (Sam Neill in Event Horizon, Sam Neill in In the Mouth of Madness, Sam Neill in Daybreakers… okay, sure, I need to broaden my interests). And then there’s one of my favorite examples of an actor just cutting loose in a horror film, letting their performance ambitions run amok: John Ratzenberger in 1987’s House II: The Second Story.

Now, I’m not going to summarize House II’s plot for you, since that’s not really the point of this here piece. I’m a Cheers fan, first and foremost, and it should be incredibly obvious that I only discovered House II because of my never ending affection for Ratzenberger and Cliff Clavin. Hell, he’s the pulsating heart of one of the best Halloween sitcom episodes of all time! So as an unabashed fan of the know-it-all barfly, House II is a complete revelation because of one guy: Bill Towner.

If you go into House II expecting lots of Ratzenberger, you’ll be served a nothing burger for the first hour. Our hero doesn’t show up until a whopping 58 minutes into the 88-minute-long movie, but Ratzenberger’s role in House II is well worth waiting for.

Bill Towner is basically Cliff Clavin in Indiana Jones cosplay. The character is total wish fulfillment for our favorite quasi-sad sack mailman. As Bill Towner, Ratzenberger gets to play another guy with blue collar job that loves showing off his smarts. Unlike Clavin, Towner’s brains get a bit of respect (albeit bewildered respect) from Jesse (Arye Gross). Everywhere Bill Towner stands is his “office,” and people must be invited in.

His whole introductory sequence is maybe the most Ratzenberger-y bit of business ever committed to film. He bulldozes his way into the titular house, talking over Jesse and dropping idiosyncratic idioms like “upchuck in your shorts.” He’s a mustachioed wrecking ball with gadgets galore, there to tear down walls and investigate whatever’s left standing. I wouldn’t be surprised if the entire scene was improvised by the guy, the guy that bluffed his way into his gig on Cheers by convincing the producers that the bar needed a know-it-all.

But electrician isn’t Towner’s only gig. He’s also, as his business card reveals, an adventurer of the highest magnitude. When Towner busts through the living room wall and finds “some kind of alternate universe in there or something,” he gamely pulls out a sword and leads an expedition into the unknown. And that’s when we get a gift, one that Hollywood denied us in the years before and after House II’s theatrical run: we get the gift of swashbuckling John Ratzenberger.

This is definitely what the inside of Cliff Clavin’s head looks like, one hundred percent, and this is also the kind of action hero that I like seeing. Give me a pudgy, bespectacled guy with a sword kicking ass and doing derring-do any day!

And then, with the damsel rescued and the horde beat back, our heroes escape back to the living room only to find that the incomparably competent Bill’s already waiting for them. He leaves his card and peaces out, to make it home in tie for his kid’s little league game. Bill Towner only gets 10 minutes of screen time, but they’re a thrilling 10 minutes for all of us Cliff Clavin super fans (there are dozens of us!). And for those 10 minutes, John Ratzenberger got to be something that boring, conventional Hollywood would never let him be otherwise: a legit action hero.

Stream House II: The Second Story on Prime Video