I Can’t Believe Sam Heughan Doesn’t Take His Shirt Off in ‘SAS: Rise of the Black Swan’

When I logged onto my Netflix homepage yesterday, I learned that Outlander star Sam Heughan currently stars in a movie called SAS: Rise of the Black Swan. The film, originally titled SAS: Red Notice, casts Heughan as a modern day special forces agent who wants nothing more than to propose to his pretty girlfriend (played by Hannah John-Kamen) in France. However, mean mercenaries hijack the Eurostar train they’re riding mid-Chunnel, thrusting our hero into the fight of his life.

SAS: Rise of the Black Swan might look like a paint-by-numbers action flick, complete with Ruby Rose playing a baddie and Sam Heughan playing a rugged British assassin-type, but did the film have something more to offer the world? Were people simply watching it because it was there, on Netflix, or did the great Sam Heughan deign to doff his top at least once in the film? That is, I wondered if the very handsome Heughan took his shirt (or more) off in SAS: Rise of the Black Swan. If so, perhaps the film would be worth my precious time. If not, then what was the point of casting one of the most arresting physical presences working onscreen today?

So I did what any normal hot-blooded straight woman would do. I scrolled my curser quickly through the run-time line of SAS: Rise of the Black Swan looking for any scene where Sam Heughan showed up where he might also be shirtless. I found tender moments where Heughan leaned in for a kiss and a snuggle with John-Kamen and even — spoilers! — a romantic wedding scene. There were cuddles and sweet nothings and gun fights and explosions. But I didn’t see anything in my cursory skim of the flick that hinted at anything as hot as what you get in any old episode of Outlander. 

Now I know what you might be thinking: Meghan, you didn’t actually watch every second of SAS: Rise of the Black Swan on Netflix. Mayhaps you missed a moment where our highland hunk changes out of a tight t-shirt into a fresh henley? Except Decider’s Johnny Loftus did watch SAS: Rise of the Black Swan and confirmed there was neither sex nor skin in the movie. 

So what’s the big deal? My issue is I loathe waste. Casting Sam Heughan in a macho action movie role and not having even one scene where he takes off his shirt is wasting one of the most beautiful physical performers of all time. I’m serious. (After all, I am the one who has dubbed and Outlander co-star Caitriona Balfe the modern day Astaire and Rodgers, but for sex scenes.) Not using Heughan’s physicality is like casting Barbra Streisand and refusing to let her sing. It’s like hiring Kristen Wiig for a comedy without letting her play funny. It’s like casting Liam Neeson in a revenge flick and not letting him ever take a lick of revenge!

SAS: Rise of the Black Swan needed more shirtless Sam Heughan scenes. Perhaps if the film had some of those, it would be worth watching. As it is, I’d rather spend my evening watching He’s All That, a film that confirms at least one shirtless dude in its trailer… If only it was Sam Heughan, though!

Where to stream SAS: Rise of the Black Swan