Stream It Or Skip It: ‘Donkeyhead’ on Netflix, An Ava DuVernay Produced Indie Family Drama

Canadian filmmaker Agam Darshi wrote, directed and stars in Donkeyhead, a drama about adult siblings that return home after their father has a stroke and dredge up their annoyances with one another. The title refers to a term of endearment used by Punjabi families and Ava DuVernay’s distribution company ARRAY picked up the film for release on Netflix as part of their ongoing mission to uplift and distribute minority art along with Sujata Day’s Definition Please.

DONKEYHEAD: STREAM IT OR SKIP IT?

The Gist: Mona (Agam Darshi), an aspiring writer, lives a small life in her Canadian hometown largely avoiding real work and having an affair with a married man. While her three siblings have spread their wings and moved away, Mona sticks around under the guise of being the primary caretaker for their ailing father, though she’s ill-equipped for the work of that job and is really just in a state of arrested development. But when her father has a serious stroke, she is forced to call her successful siblings and when they arrive, years-worth of pent-up frustration finally boil over.

What Will It Remind You Of?: An indie family drama set against the backdrop of an ailing parent, Donkeyhead is as funny, tense, and loving as studio Hollywood releases like The Family Stone or This Is Where I Leave You.

Performance Worth Watching: Agam Darshi’s central performance as a down-and-out member of a successful family expertly toes the line between rooting for Mona and wanting to grab her by the shoulders and shake her. But it’s Stephen Lobo who plays Parm, Mona’s so-perfect-it’s-painful twin brother, who steals the show. At first he’s level-headed and soft spoken as he tries to hold the warring family together. But when Mona pushes him too far, he breaks and Lobo takes the opportunity to show his range.

Memorable Dialogue: After barking an order at Mona to buy milk, her father delivers a devastating one-liner once she’s out of earshot. Softly he admits, “you’re a good girl,” and her belief that he feels the opposite is what draws out much of the tension later in the film.

Sex and Skin: Mona’s ongoing affair with her father’s attorney makes an early appearance with a steamy scene, but nothing too explicit.

Our Take: Meditations on familial relationships are a rich text because almost everyone in the world can relate to a disagreement with a sibling or a parent and the associated fallout of those fights. Donkeyhead is no different, and centering the story on Mona, who has strained relationships with both her siblings and her sick father, makes the film intense and occasionally uncomfortable but believable.

Mona is a flawed character. She lacks ambition, acts out like she’s still a teenager, and seems to shirk responsibility about the trajectory of her life. But she’s also deeply caring and leans into her new role as her father’s primary caretaker, which seems to give her a purpose that her writing dreams could not. Juxtaposed against her three siblings, she’s both empathetic and wildly frustrating—the makings of an exciting central character.

As an emotionally centered film, the performances are vital to selling the story and Darshi’s leading performance along with those of Lobo, Sandy Sidhu and Husein “Huse” Madhavji are lived-in and powerful. Sidhu is forceful as Mona’s sister, a doctor with a perfect life who can’t seem to understand why Mona can’t get hers together; Lobo plays the golden child with a muted confidence; and Madhavji brings warmth to the screen as the brother who can’t possibly measure up to the others but is trying his best (and can carry on knowing that at least he isn’t Mona). The quartet play off of each other with such comfort, they feel like real siblings on the screen.

Donkeyhead is also centered on a Sikh family, and the traditions and customs of the South Asian religion are presented in a welcoming manner: just specific enough to tap into shared immigrant culture, but also generic enough to be relatable to anyone who has dealt with elders in a community. Mona screams at her aunt who wants to host a 3-day prayer for her dad and later moons the nosy aunties that are watching her from the window. The things we all wish we could do, Mona does. It’s a great diaspora story that allows our culture to be the backdrop but not the defining aspects of the plot.

The one major flaw is that Mona coasts on her charm and doesn’t take responsibility for her actions. Late in the film, after a shouting match with her twin brother Parm, Mona slices him by blurting out one of his long-held secrets in front of their comatose dad and their watchful aunt. It’s cruel, and while she and Parm eventually make up, she never explicitly apologizes for her actions. If audiences are to believe that she’s grown from this ordeal, owning up to her faults should be at the top of the list.

Ultimately, the film is about navigating complex relationships, which are often those forged in blood. Donkeyhead forces you to think about the things you’ve left unsaid or how easily we’re able to cut down the people we are closest to. At just under two hours, the film is a tight, impactful journey worth taking.

Our Call: STREAM IT. Donkeyhead is provocative and unafraid to show the dark side of even the closest relationships.

Radhika Menon (@menonrad) is a TV-obsessed writer based in New York City. Her work has appeared on Paste Magazine, Teen Vogue, Vulture and more. At any given moment, she can ruminate at length over Friday Night Lights, the University of Michigan, and the perfect slice of pizza. You may call her Rad.