Stream It Or Skip It: ‘Dog’ on VOD, Channing Tatum’s Shamelessly Sentimental Man-and-Dog Odd-Couple Dramedy

Now on VOD, Dog is the story of a man and someone else’s dog, who seems destined to be the man’s dog, sooner or later. We haven’t seen Channing Tatum’s face in a movie since 2017’s Kingsman: The Golden Circle (although there was that cameo in Free Guy), and his most recent roles were voiceovers in Smallfoot and America: The Motion Picture – so this new film, in which he plays a PTSD-afflicted soldier, marks a return of sorts for the star-slash-sex-symbol. It’s also his first credit as a director, co-helming the film with fellow first-timer Reid Carolin. Dog is officially a sleeper success at the box office, outperforming stuff like Death on the Nile and Moonfall. Why? Because DOGGIE! Also, Tatum sans SHIRT!

DOG: STREAM IT OR SKIP IT?

The Gist: The first image we see is of a puppy: Tiny, fuzzy, adorable. The opening credits shuffle through Lulu’s life as an Army Ranger. Then we meet Jackson Briggs (Tatum), face down on the floor next to his bed, panting, emerging from some sort of episode. He was in the same unit as Lulu. Once an elite warrior, now he takes shit from snotty teenagers as he slaps together sub sandwiches in a Montana convenience store. He calls his superiors and asks them to reinstate him, but he keeps getting stonewalled. The doctors aren’t clearing him. He gets terrible headaches. He has scars on his head and neck, a bullet wound through his shoulder.

He’s discontent, but also still capable of wisecracking his way through the day. He gets a call – one of his buddies from the Ranger unit is dead. Single-car accident. He rubs the silver off scratchoff lottery tickets and tosses them on the floor of his Bronco on his way to the wake at a pub, where everyone’s in their dress blues, but he’s in jeans and a T-shirt. He gets down on his knees and begs to be reinstated, but his officer says it’s up to the doctors and the doctors haven’t cleared him.

Actually, they have one gig for Jackson. It’s a shit gig but it’s in the memory of his dead compadre: Bring his dog Lulu down so she can attend her master’s funeral. War hero dog, next to the coffin. Easier said than done – the pup also has PTSD and has been removed from duty and, oh, by the way, don’t touch her ears. Without her owner, she’s a handful. She can’t fly, so Jackson has to chauffeur her to Arizona and back, and then she’ll be euthanized, because that’s Army protocol. So Jackson shoves the poor snapping, barking, lunging, stressed-out animal in the back of the Bronco and hits the highway. Road trip time, and don’t be surprised if they have some mishaps and misadventures, man and someone else’s dog, who sure seem like they’ll end up together, bonding over their mutual physical and psychological damage.

What Movies Will It Remind You Of?: Dog conjures the spirit of The Last Detail and splatters it with bits of K-9, Turner and Hooch and the Chuck Norris masterpiece Top Dog.

Performance Worth Watching: Conventional wisdom says to pick the dog here, because she’s a sweetheart of a Belgian Malinois, and she’s such a good girl in a role that’s largely dialogue-free.

Memorable Dialogue: “Don’t look all shocked, man. It’s war. It’s not all unicorns and rainbow vaginas out there.” – Jackson glibly skims past the horrors of armed conflict

Sex and Skin: None. Jackson’s yowza encounter with a pair of handsy new-age Portlandites gets interrupted less by the dog and more by the dog’s encounter with a Portlandite animal-rights activist. All together now: I hate when that happens!

Our Take: The underwhelm is palpable here. Dog offers some lovely postcard cinematography as our protagonists meander through the Pacific Northwest, and a generally agreeable turn from Tatum – key word being “generally,” because Jackson is a collection of basic traits in need of a more nuanced performance and stronger writing to bring the character to life. Jackson finds himself trapped in a lumpy blend of comedy and drama that never smooths out; the laughs lack punch and the sentimental beats inspire a sniffle, maybe two, when they clearly want to clamp your tears in tongs and yank.

Plot-wise, the umbrella narrative covers a loose series of episodes hodgepodging from wacky to quasi-profound: Lulu runs off, forcing Jackson to trespass on private land, prompting a pot farmer to shoot him with a tranquilizer dart. Jackson treks to Portland to get laid, and encounters eccentric hipster zoomers. They stop by San Francisco and pretend to be a blind veteran and his dog to scam a fancy hotel room. They visit a friend and former Ranger K-9 specialist (Ethan Suplee) for a little advice. They end up broken down in the rain and Tatum despairs beneath the rumbling clouds, soaked in a white T-shirt, upper body bulging. Nothing goes as planned, as we wholly expect, because the screenwriters rarely show interest in deviating from formula.

One can sense Tatum and Carolin’s attempt to render Dog a character piece like Nomadland, putting Jackson’s attempt to find some focus, and therefore himself and his place in the world, against the backdrop of current-day Americana. But Dog clearly differentiates itself from deeper films by populating the landscape with stereotypes and a protagonist who’s a little too lightweight to inspire deep empathy. All the while, Jackson just can’t get Lulu to trust him and eat from his hand — the dog is frequently stressed out, and anyone who’s been around an unhappy pooch who’s always barking and straining at the lead will find this movie, well, frequently stressful. Jackson eventually gets a clue, and they do take a bath together at about the halfway point, a clear indicator that the movie’s final scene isn’t going to be like Old Yeller.

Our Call: Fans of Tatum’s genial persona (and sweaty, shirtless torso) may find the movie worth a gander: Hot dog! But for the rest of us? Woof! SKIP IT.

John Serba is a freelance writer and film critic based in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Read more of his work at johnserbaatlarge.com.