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Jennette McCurdy is revealing more intimate moments from her relationship with her late mother, this time while appearing on Red Table Talk. The former iCarly star, who has been promoting her memoir, I’m Glad My Mom Died, stopped by the Facebook Watch series today to share more details about her experience growing up with an abusive mom, as detailed in her book.

While talking with hosts Jada Pinkett Smith, Willow Smith and Adrienne Banfield Norris about her book, McCurdy read aloud from an email she received from her mom, Debbie, in 2012. Debbie sent the message to her daughter after finding out she was in a relationship with a man.

“‘Dear Nette, I am so disappointed in you. You used to be my perfect little angel, but now you’re nothing more than a little slut, a floozy, all used up,'” McCurdy read aloud from the email.

“‘And to think, you wasted it on that hideous ogre of a man. I saw the pictures on a website called TMZ. I saw you rubbing his disgusting hairy stomach,'” she read, adding, “‘Add that to a list of things you are: liar, conniving, evil. You look pudgier too. It’s clear you are eating your guilt.”

McCurdy’s mom ended the email by calling her an “ugly monster,” then telling her to send for money for a new fridge, explaining, “ours broke.”

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Her appearance on Red Table Talk included heavy, intense topics, but also featured more hopeful moments, too, including McCurdy’s comments about the progress she’s been able to make in therapy and the healing she’s done since her mom’s death from cancer in 2013.

“I work towards forgiveness. I will get emotional,” McCurdy said on today’s episode. “I worked towards forgiveness for a really long time and my therapist said to me one day, ‘What if you don’t have to work toward forgiveness?’ And I wept and I knew that that’s what I needed to hear.”

Red Table Talk airs Wednesdays on Facebook Watch.