Why Daemon’s Impotence on ‘House of the Dragon’ is a Great Character Choice

In House of the Dragon Episode 4 “King of the Narrow Sea,” Prince Daemon Targaryen (Matt Smith) almost sleeps with his niece Rhaenyra (Milly Alcock) in the middle of a King’s Landing pleasure house. He almost does it, but doesn’t. While we conjectured that something inside forced Daemon to stop before he took Rhaenyra’s virginity, a recent HBO-approved “Inside the Episode” installment revealed that something was literally impotence. He literally couldn’t get it up.

“Ultimately, his impotence in this scene is a reflection of the fact that he knows deep down what he’s doing isn’t right,” House of the Dragon executive producer and showrunner Miguel Sapochnik said.

The episode’s director, Clare Kilner, goes even further to break down the psychology of the scene: “He thinks it’s shocking to her. But she doesn’t just get shocked, she gets excited by it. And when that happens, he has nothing. And, basically, he can’t handle not being in charge or in control.”

Whether you want to take the showrunner’s perspective, that Daemon felt it wasn’t right, or the director’s POV, which is that Daemon needs to be in control, the bottom line is that Daemon and Rhaenyra did not have full-on sex because Daemon has impotence issues in the bedroom. In fact, in both of Daemon’s sex scenes so far in the series, he has trouble going all the way. In House of the Dragon Episode 1 “The Heirs of the Dragon,” he struggles with lover Mysaria (Sonoya Mizuno) because he’s upset that his brother will replace him with a young male heir. He breaks off their sexual encounter and sullenly wraps a blanket around himself as Mysaria assures him that no one can replace him.

So Daemon Targaryen — dragonrider, warrior, rogue prince — has impotence issues in the bedroom. What’s the big deal? Well, it’s a fascinating character choice that doubles as a better, more realistic reflection of sexuality in Game of Thrones‘s world. Because, uh, men do occasionally have impotence issues in the bedroom. So, really, it’s actually not a big deal. But it can serve as a point of anxiety for men or, as in Daemon’s case, a reflection of pre-existing anxiety bubbling under a carefully controlled surface.

Daemon is inscrutable to those around him. He’s considered to be erratic, vacillating between heroism and villainy. We’ve seen scenes where he insults his brother Viserys (Paddy Considine) only to defend him in the next breath. In last week’s episode, he humbly returns to King’s Landing only to brashly burn down the bridges he’s just rebuilt. Men like Otto Hightower (Rhys Ifans) fear what giving Daemon power might bring to the realm. Daemon Targaryen is more than a man; he’s a force of nature.

But his impotency issues actually underline the fact that Daemon is just a man. He might have some weird lizard DNA that allows him to bond with a giant red dragon, but he’s also got the same emotions we all have. He is insecure about being passed over and desperate for his brother’s affection. When Rhaenyra confronted him on Dragonstone, we learned that his peacocking and trouble-making was all just a bluff to get Viserys’s attention. And this week, he couldn’t quite get himself to fully besmirch his niece (though he tried).

Daemon’s impotence gives him an all-too-human weakness. It proves he has vulnerabilities and insecurities. It shows that he is more than the iconic “Rogue Prince” of George R.R. Martin’s books; he is a man with flaws. Most importantly, he’s a man struggling to find a real connection with someone. Sometimes, specifically a physical one.