You Won’t Be Able to Unsee ‘Quasi’s’ Scrotum Torture Scene

It’s no coincidence that Hulu’s new comedy Quasi, which began streaming today, was released on 4/20, aka the weed number day. That kind of dorky, middle-school humor is the entire ethos of the latest film from the Broken Lizard dudes, aka the guys from Super Troopers. Don’t bother trying to count the number dick jokes in this satire of The Hunchback of Notre-Dame, because you’ll quickly lose track. But there’s one dick joke that stands out among the crowd—one that is so disgusting and ludicrous you’ll be haunted by the imagery for the rest of your days—and that’s the scrotum torture scene.

Very loosely inspired by Victor Hugo’s famous 1831 novel, Quasi stars Steve Lemme as Quasimodo, a humble hunchback who works for the King of France (Jay Chandrasekhar) designing torture machines. But his life is completely changed when he wins the lottery for a meeting with the Pope (Paul Soter), and ends up caught in the middle of the king’s scheme to assassinate the Pope, as well as the Pope’s scheme to assassinate the king. But the real story is the emotional journey of Quasi and his best buddy Duchamp (Kevin Heffernan). Quasi and Duchamp insist they aren’t best friends, but, of course, they are. And nothing says “best friend” like saving your buddy whose balls are nailed to stump.

It’s a long story, but Duchamp gets captured by the king’s guard and tortured. But this isn’t just any kind of torture: This is “getting a metal stake driven through your scrotum and having your balls cut off” torture. Quasi doesn’t spare viewers the visual torture of seeing Duchamp’s realistic-looking balls nailed to a stump, but luckily Quasi rides in to save the day before they actually get chopped off. Unfortunately, Duchamp scrotum is still firmly anchored down while chaos ensues. The result? The most horrific example of “stretchy skin” I’ve ever seen on screen.

Like some sort of messed-up take on Elastigirl from The Incredibles, Duchamp’s scrotum stretches to four times its natural length, as Duchamp howls in pain. It continues to stretch horribly while his friends scramble to pull the nail out of the stump. Obviously, some sort of fleshy, skin-colored prosthetic was used, but damn if it doesn’t look real. The entire thing lasts less than 30 seconds, but it’s truly one of the most excruciating movie scenes these cynical eyes have ever witnessed.

You have to give points to the Broken Lizard boys for originality, at least. But hopefully, you didn’t watch that scene while high. One can only imagine the sort of weed-induced nightmares that image would prompt. If you’re morbidly curious, you can watch Quasi on Hulu, and you can find the scrotum torture scene about 80 minutes into the movie. Have fun bleaching your eyeballs after viewing!