‘Selling Sunset’s Amanza Smith Speaks On “Mentally Abusive” Mom And Being Molested By “Pedophile” Stepdad And Stepgrandfather: “There Was No Safe Space”

Despite the seemingly endless parade of sexy outfits and work drama, Selling Sunset isn’t all fabulous fashion, luxury real estate, and petty fights. Between the sales and workplace brawls, each season of Netflix’s popular reality series features emotional heart-to-hearts between cast members and moments of intense vulnerability. One of Season 7’s most memorable scenes, for instance, shows Amanza Smith opening up to Chelsea Lazkani about her incredibly difficult childhood.

In Episode 5, after the two real estate agents had a disagreement, Lazkani invited Smith out for drinks to clear the air in the wake of learning about her life story. “I almost broke down in tears truly, because I forgot to remember that behind any incredibly strong person is a story,” Lazkani said.

Smith proceeded to explain that she was raised by her mom and her stepdad who were mentally and physically abusive. “My stepdad and my stepdad’s father are pedophiles. I don’t remember exact timelines, but from the time I was three, and I’m pretty sure the last time it happened was when I was around 11, I was molested by my step-grandfather and my stepdad,” she said. “Simultaneously in my house, my mom was very mentally abusive. And so there was no safe space.”

“I wasn’t going to tell my mom what was happening, because if my stepdad went away, sadly — and this sounds so fucked up — in the house he was sometimes the better parent. Because that only happened sometimes and my mom was mentally abusive every single day,” Smith explained. “So when people are like, ‘How are you so strong?’ From a very young age the people that were supposed to be protecting me didn’t, so it’s a survival mechanism.”

Lazkani told Smith that she was “shocked” to hear the news and assured her she’s “such an incredible mother, friend, and businesswoman” who always seems to have everything “so figured out.”

“I don’t want people to think that I’m always OK and I’ve figured it out, because that is a very heavy weight to carry,” Smith replied. “When you don’t see me go out with our friends… it’s probably because I’m at home and I’m laid out in my bed and I’ve hired somebody to care for my kids for three days because I am just in a dark place. And I am just sad. And I don’t want to have to do that anymore.”

Smith shared her story in an interview with Mr. Warburton Magazine back in December 2022, saying, “I truly believe that everything happens for a reason. I would change nothing in my life. I would be born again, and I would live the exact same life of trauma and abuse. I would do it all over again because I am strong enough. I was chosen to go through that. Now I can be a voice to help others get through it.”

In Selling Sunset Season 7, Lazkani thanked Smith for her vulnerability and for encouraging others — including herself — to feel more comfortable sharing their struggles.

“That is the reason why I’m sharing,” Smith said. “I want people to know if you struggle with anything along the way — if you’re depressed, if you’re anxious, if you’re even suicidal — don’t give up. Don’t give up. Don’t give up. I’m on the other side of it and I can be like, ‘Look. Don’t give up.'”

Selling Sunset Season 7 is now streaming on Netflix.

If you or someone you know needs to reach out about sexual abuse or assault, RAINN is available 24/7 at 800-656-HOPE (4673), or online at RAINN.org.