The six weird things we learned

The six weird things we learned

This week’s episode of ”The Bachelorette” was sort of the equivalent of getting a dozen black roses from ABC. We wanted Charlie! We wanted Ryan! We got a lot of freaky Russ and cowboy coward Brook. Oh, well. Here are our six favorite things about last night’s episode:

6. Does Russ have multiple personality disorder or what? What point exactly was he trying to make when he said, ”They were attacks on the character I was on the show.” At least host Chris put him in his place by retorting, ”But wait. You played yourself on the show.”

5. How cute was nouveau-babe Bob? And how much did he almost humiliate himself? Bob on taking care of his own needs: ”So now I please myself… and that sounds really weird.” At least the funny guy realized what he’d said before he became the punchline.

4. Are panic attacks hot? They are when Ken doll-lookalike Jamie is talking about having them.

3. Brook single-handedly set back the coolness of cowboys everywhere. When he said his fellow horse lovers were all ”patting me on the back saying, Way to stand up for the cowboys” you knew the guy should look forward to a long life loving the equine.

2. Speaking of animal lovers…uh, Greg and Goldie? Canines everywhere should boycott the show. Well, at least he didn’t write a rap for Goldie.

1. To be filed under things we didn’t want to know: Of the “two kinds” of orgasms (thanks for the sex ed lesson, Trista), Trista has experienced one though she says “I have yet to experience the other.” Hmmm…Charlie and Ryan are probably feeling not so manly right about now.

What was your favorite thing about last night’s episode?