Stupid Questions

She played a sapphically inclined witch on TV’s Buffy the Vampire Slayer and a sexually curious flutist in the American Pie movies. Next week, you can spot Alyson Hannigan as a cop-in-training on a two-episode guest stint on Fox’s That ’70s Show (airing in February). We caught up with her in London, where she can currently be seen with Luke Perry in a stage production of When Harry Met Sally. Read below to see what happened When Alyson Met a Bunch of Really Stupid Questions. — Scott Brown and Adam B. Vary

You will soon appear on That ’70s Show. We haven’t watched that show in ages. What the hell is happening on it? Is it still the ’70s?

Ah, yes, I don’t know what year it is, but definitely the ’70s. Could be late ’70s.

You costar with Ashton Kutcher. Who’s getting punk’d in this scenario?

Actually, I really was convinced the only reason I was going to be on the show was for some sort of elaborate punk. I was watching my back. If anything weird happened, I was looking for hidden cameras.

How is faking an orgasm with Jason Biggs different than faking one with Luke Perry? Is the 90210 theme running through your head?

[Laughs] Uh, no, but it will be now — thank you very much for that lovely visual. Well, I guess the orgasm with Luke is a lot bigger, and I have to do it more. I have to do it every day. Sometimes twice. Twice on Thursdays and Saturdays.

You’re married to Alexis Denisof, a regular on Angel. So you pretty much have to guest-star or sleep on the couch, right?

[Laughs] Well that would be nice, although it’s really not up to him. I’m hoping that they can just shoot Angel over here. I think Wesley needs to go back to the Watcher’s Council over in England.

Do you sing ”Surrey With the Fringe on Top” as well as Meg Ryan did?

Um. Not yet. Maybe I should try to make people’s ears bleed. Why not? I’ll try it on one night. See, that’s the great thing about theater. That one night, I could try to go for the bleeding ears, and then the next night I could go for…opera!

You were in that lesbian magazine, FHM. Did you worry that the lesbians were exploiting you?

[With great fake enthusiasm] That’s why I did it! Ha ha ha — huh? That’s not so good. Oh, dear. I’m sorry, I missed that joke. It’s probably the time difference. Ohhh, I feel dumb. This joke’s not working out.

Uh, never mind. So, do you find it suspicious that Buffy costar Anthony Stewart Head became Anthony Head when he went back to England? What happened to Stewart? Was Stewart jettisoned over the North Atlantic?

I think it got lost in his luggage.

We suspect witches and lesbians.

You cracked it. That’s probably it, but I suspect it’s got something to do with the Screen Actors Guild.