''Deadwood'': A battle to the death

”Deadwood”: A battle to the death

Wow. I mean, wow. After viewing this episode, I think I need to lie down. Or maybe stand up. Or splash a little cold water on my face. In fact, I’ll be right back.

Okay, I’m all collected. I drank some soothing tea and watched A Charlie Brown Christmas. That always helps calm my nerves.

You all remember when I told you last week that this season was the best ever? Well, I was proven right tonight, with death, drugs, and rock & roll in the streets of Deadwood. Take that, naysayers! (You know who you are, Amy G. from upstate New York.)

There was almost too much action to talk about. Nearly every moment either slammed forward the plot or paid off conflicts from prior episodes. (I’m excluding the painful ramblings about the inner workings of a theater company in a frontier town. This subplot needs to pay off soon. At the very least I want to see Al in a musical version of Romeo and Juliet, with Trixie as Juliet —.)

Hands down, the winner of Best (and Most Gruesome) Scene in the West was the throwdown in the thoroughfare between Dan and the Captain. Hearst wants to provoke a fight for a reason that Al (and I) can’t fathom. ”It’s past me,” Al says. ”I can not figure the f—-in’ angle.” Then he gives Dan permission to engage Hearst’s man. The reason may be connected to the union-talking Cornishman who wound up dead in the street, but with both Dan and Bullock gearing up to take on Hearst, reason goes out the window. Actually, reason appeared to go over a cart and into the mud and then disappear altogether once Dan tore out the Captain’s eyeball. If you recall the carefully choreographed hand-to-hand fights between Captain Kirk and [fill in enemy alien of choice here] on the original Star Trek, well, this would a total 180-degree opposite. The battle was ugly, clumsy, and dirty, and it ultimately felt as real as the rest of the series. I had a moment of panic when the Captain pulled a Mike Tyson on Dan’s ear and I honestly believed that Dan was going to be killed. (That’s the mark of a great series, when the audience truly believes that no character is safe. By contrast, I never worried about a member of the A-Team actually getting shot. Or anyone on that show getting shot, really.) But Dan pulled off a win and killed his enemy with a thwack of wood to the head, and although it looks like Dan will physically recover, it seems there are a few mental issues to get over. Dan not wanting to see the Doc after the fight I get, but turning down the ladies and booze? Well, that just screams to me ”shame spiral.”

The fallout was also intense: Bullock confronted a very drunk Hearst at the Bella Union and hauled him off to the slammer. Despite Hearst’s harshly saying, ”It happens — it’s the nature if things,” about the Captain’s death, Major Dad did a fine job of conveying that he really cared about the old coot who was in his service for so long. (I am also sending up a silent prayer that the Captain’s replacement is Jameson Parker from Simon & Simon. That would just make my day.) But Al had a good point as Bullock marched Hearst off to the pokey: ”The sheriff eliminates several of our options.” And no doubt, once Hearst sobers up, his longer-term plans will take a backseat to getting revenge against Bullock and Swearengen.

A few other moments of note: The Widow Garret gets randy. Now, I didn’t want to have to use that word, and I know you didn’t want to read it. But honestly, there just is no other way to describe her demeanor when she offered to wash Ellsworth’s back while he was in the bathtub. Yet again Ellsworth’s ego takes a blow: He figures out via a smooch that his wife is only looking for love because she is back on the drugs. Ellsworth’s reminder to her not to forget little Sophia as he prepared to leave the house was a Lifetime-movie moment. Then there was Trixie’s verbal assault on Sol via a wooden wall, and the sad end to Hostetler, just when it seemed that everything was going to work out. Steve the Drunk really needs to get whupped for causing Hostetler’s suicide.

I can’t believe we are almost halfway through the season — but it looks like even better stuff lies ahead.

So now talk amongst yourselves: How will Hearst react toward Bullock and Al? And will he ever finish that veranda? Who will take over the bank now that the widow is headed for Betty Ford? And the Doc didn’t cough at all tonight: Maybe he just had a cold and isn’t a lunger after all? Or am I a wide-eyed optimist?