'American Idol' judges: First glamour shot! -- EXCLUSIVE

Now that we know Mariah Carey and Nicki Minaj are not (yet) engaged in an epic feud one day after American Idol‘s season 12 judging announcement, feast your eyes on the first official judges portrait — a sea of understated navy topped with a dollop of rainbow sherbet. It is my esteemed privilege to be the first one to ask, “What’s your damage, Nicki Minaj’s pants?” Will the living, breathing, rapping cotton candy dispenser insist on corrupting every serene group shot with a “Can you see my no-no?” expression of faux surprise? Stay tuned.

Also, come on, Randy. Step it up,

. Where’s your sparkly pin of the day?

Fun fact: Keith Urban and Mariah Carey are currently neck-and-neck in today’s “Which Idol judge will be best-dressed?” poll, sponsored by the Village People’s “In the Navy.” Vote below because it’s imperative that we have an official winner.

Your thoughts on the pic? Are we amused by Randy’s gold coin buttons and five-sixths-length sleeves, or does he resemble a dazed and confused toy soldier? Is Mimi automatically the most commanding visual presence — despite Nicki’s hair — just by showing up? Should I get to work on a formal proposition to get Nicki Minaj to never wear those pants again?

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