Any clown with Internet access can write whatever he wants and put it on the web, for all (or, more likely, almost none) to see. For instance, in an article published Thursday morning entitled “This is the best Thanksgiving in NFL history,” some nitwit laid out six reasons why Thanksgiving 2014 was the top set of turkey day games the league had ever seen.
His main reasons: There were two great games and one very-good one. One was an NFC championship rematch, another was a classic NFC East division battle and the third was a worthy matchup between adequate NFC North teams. There’d be no stinkers, not with each of those games being played by teams in the same division. The writer was adamant it. Not all the games would be good, but they’d be compelling, important and captivating.
Man, am I stupid.
(AP)
Three games, three blowouts, zero drama. The Thanksgiving games were so bad that talking about immigration reform with Aunt Ruth after her three glasses of wine was preferable to sitting in front of the TV and watching ball.
With the defending Super Bowl champions and their fierce rivals playing, plus a rivalry game in Cowboys-Eagles, Thursday was supposed to be a can’t-miss hit, like making a movie starring Tom Hanks and Julia Roberts or having a TV show produced by the guy from Lost and directed by the guy from Friday Night Lights. But Thursday ended up being the NFL’s version of Larry Crowne and The Leftovers. (What are Larry Crowne and The Leftovers, you ask? Exactly.)
There’s always the possibility for duds, of course, and, in the lightest defense of myself as possible, I acknowledged Thursday could be one. This year’s primetime schedule had shown how bad it can be. But this wasn’t a dud. This was a bellyfop from the high dive. How bad was it? There were more field goals (13) than touchdowns (11).
The Lions-Bears game was so boring a soccer game broke out. Philly-Dallas was entertaining for about 15 minutes, thanks to the Eagles’ inability to put away the game despite ample opportunity. Then Tony Romo did his Tony Romo thing, the game turned into a rout and Romo put together his worst Thanksgiving on record.
(NBC)
As for the main event — a 19-3 dud won by Seattle — the lone saving grace was that it was a rare NFL game that ended in almost three hours. (Poor Al Michaels and Cris Collinsworth. Dudes can’t catch a break this year.)
29, 29, 30, 24, 35, 20, 38. Those aren’t Powerball numbers. They’re where the first seven 49ers possessions ended in their own territory. It took the team until the middle of the third quarter to cross midfield. Colin Kaepernick played so poorly that if Dan Snyder called John York and offered RG3 straight up for Kaep, I don’t know who would laugh first.
And it wasn’t just that the game weren’t close. Nothing remotely interesting even happened, like an Ndamukong Suh stomp or Mike Tomlin trying to trip Jacoby Jones or a national anthem screw-up or Selena Gomez wearing this.
(USA TODAY Sports Images)
Even Richard Sherman didn’t bite when Michele Tafoya tried to get him to talk smack about eating Thanksgiving turkey on the 49ers’ midfield logo.He gave a boilerplate answer about looking ahead, hard work and focus. THAT’S HOW BAD THURSDAY WAS. EVEN RICHARD SHERMAN WASN’T ENTERTAINING.
What’s with the NFL this year? The games have been yawner after yawner. Does it have something to do with the increased focus on passing or the rules that practically give wide receivers restraining orders against cornerbacks? Are the great games backoaded into December? Or are we just caught in a rut?
After today, the only thing I can say for certain is a quote from Winston Churchill: “The greatest lesson in life is to know that even fools are right sometimes.”
Maybe tomorrow, Winston. Maybe tomorrow.
