Avoiding anxious loops

On most days, my anxiety is tolerable. Present, but manageable. But every so often there comes a wave of anxiety that is harder to manage. This typically comes after a trigger, like a lack of sleep.

Earlier today, I asked myself a familiar question: what did I do to feel better last time I felt so anxious?

I started writing to help me think through this question. After reflecting on my most recent period of anxiety, I identified three things that help:

1. Acknowledging when my anxieties are roaring louder than usual, and being firm with myself that I need to take it seriously.
2. Talking with friends about anything. Through conversation, there is connection. Feeling connected helps me feel less anxious.
3. Play. This can mean writing, drawing, colouring, or looking around and trying to find something playful about the environment.

The connecting thread between these three points is being kind to myself. This is hard. Reading the words “be kind to yourself” never resonated with me. It was easier to not be kind than it was to be kind. With that said, after having been through a few anxious cycles, those words are starting to provide solace. I still have not fully internalised them, but I am trying.

Anxious loops happen, and they often happen without my necessarily knowing I am in a loop. I eventually notice I am feeling a bit down. When I acknowledge that I feel a bit down, I can say to myself hi, let’s do something and try my best to do something that takes my mind off the anxiety. It is not easy, but the alternative is letting my anxiety go unchecked.