What if the solution to Donald Trump’s chaos and strange rhetorical mastery is simply more chaos and more weird words? What if there was a Riddler to his Joker? (Or is it the other way around?) What if Kamala Harris was simply biding her time all along, doing her three-drinks-in aunt shtick while waiting for everyone to wake up and notice the obvious solution? Can you smell the coconuts?
Do you remember anything Biden has said in the last month? Nope! Yet everyone is talking about the wild stuff she’s said.
In case you also have no idea what’s going on, that’s because her speeches are replicating, and her wild takes on philosophy (“You exist in the context of all in which you live and what came before you”) and the wisdom of her mother (“I don’t know what’s wrong with you young people. You think you just fell out of a coconut tree?”) are spreading everywhere. (Fun fact: Those two memes were from the same speech, and were even sequential.)
Let’s be honest, we were all sick of Joe Biden, even as he was basically doing what he was supposed to be doing (making the economy work for big business, keeping hegemony as usual around the world). We’re fickle. The memes have moved on. Literally no one under 40 is going to vote for Biden. Even the socialists are turning.
Now, as the Biden campaign is going through deep struggles around its candidate’s regular daily sleepiness and incoherence, it feels great to say: Hey, let’s put the weird, unpredictable, unknown quantity up front and take some chances.
She does bits.
“At least she’s not a felon.”
It would probably destroy Hillary.
We had meme stocks, we had meme box office, let’s just have a meme candidacy. We can keep it going until November.
Plus, she’s conservative enough for America. She would absolutely kill tons of people with drones, just like Obama. And, just like Trump, she could lock anyone up — she already has, Lord knows. But there’s so much more to a Kamala Harris ticket. What qualifications does anyone else have, compared to this? An old man who loves ice cream? Let’s do it! Who cares! ROLL THEM DICE.
[DISCLAIMER: I am well-off enough to simply depart the American experiment when it all goes wrong in November and old enough to not care about the end of democracy and “the climate” and WWIII and stuff. Absolutely do not listen to me and maybe do not do this. But maybe do?]
