Jinger Duggar Vuolo on Growing Up Under 'Cult-Like' Religious Beliefs: 'I Was Terrified of the Outside World'

Jinger Duggar Vuolo is opening up about the "harmful" Christian teachings she was raised to strictly follow until finding freedom in 2017.

"Fear was a huge part of my childhood," Vuolo, 29, tells PEOPLE exclusively in this week's issue. "I thought I had to wear only skirts and dresses to please God. Music with drums, places I went or the wrong friendships could all bring harm."

Even when her family went to play a sport called broomball, Vuolo says she felt "terrified" she might be defying God's will. "I thought I could be killed in a car accident on the way, because I didn't know if God wanted me to stay home and read my Bible instead."

The former star of TLC's 19 Kids & Counting and Counting On was raised by her parents Jim Bob, 57, and Michelle Duggar, 56. The strict Christian family were devout followers of the Institute in Basic Life Principles, an organization established by disgraced minister Bill Gothard in 1961.

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The IBLP movement teaches that women should be subservient to their husbands and that followers should shun dancing, dating and much of modern popular culture. Jim Bob and Michelle have spoken at its seminars; Gothard, 88, led the church until 2014, when more than 30 women accused him of harassment and molestation.

"[Gothard's] teachings in a nutshell are based on fear and superstition and leave you in a place where you feel like, 'I don't know what God expects of me,' " says Vuolo. "The fear kept me crippled with anxiety. I was terrified of the outside world."

In 2017, her perspective began to shift. "His teachings were so harmful, and I'm seeing more of the effects of that in the lives of my friends and people who grew up in that community with me," she says. "There are a lot of cult-like tendencies." She ultimately walked away from IBLP altogether. While Vuolo stresses that she's still a strong Christian, her understanding of how to live her faith has changed.

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Watch the full episode of People Features: Jinger Duggar Vuolo below

Now, she's hoping to help others with her new memoir Becoming Free Indeed, in which she details leaving behind her childhood fears and embracing a new life — one still based in faith but no longer commanded by one living man.

"That's the beauty of this journey," she says. "The teaching I grew up under was harmful, it was damaging, and there are lasting effects. But I know other people are struggling and people who are still stuck. I want to share my story, and maybe it will help even just one person to be freed."