This is actually the sanest video on this channel.
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Gumshoe Diaries: “Kill me, Kate”
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“Step by Step” is basically just “The Brady Bunch”
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#Last Lines From Great Books: A Twitter game
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Reddit thread: Tell me your ‘Glitch in the Matrix’ stories
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Why I’m glad Skyfall isn’t all about the gadgets
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Today I Fucked Up: A subreddit where fuckups are winners
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All the best exclamations from Adventure Time’s Finn the Human
Videos
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The best bitchfest ever about the worst burrito ever
Last summer, a guy known as Luckyshirt got a burrito with all the fillings put in the wrong way:
Jesus. So he wrote an elegant tirade at the poor fool who had fucked it up. A sample:
Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.
Luckyshirt’s righteous anger got him over 60,000 notes on Tumblr, a rarified level of glory for anyone but teens making amiable life observations.
And then this weekend, the vlogger NineteenPercent did a dramatic reading of that rant as part of her “Tiny Tirade” series. She nailed the timing and made her own interpretive decisions, rather than simply reciting the text with the exact implied tones and tempo. What I’m saying is that this is art.
Watch the best performance of the best reaction to the worst Chipotle purchase. »
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69,013 people don’t know the true meaning of Thanksgiving
Did you already listen to Nicole Westbrook’s terrible song “It’s Thanksgiving”? It’s at 3.8 million views right now, still rising fast, I’m guessing maybe 20-50 million once we’ve all played it at our Christmas parties.
“It’s Thanksgiving” sounds a lot like Rebecca Black’s “Friday” — both were written and produced by Patrice Wilson — or “Hot Problems”. And so far it seems to be playing out just like those songs. Fame, backlash, obvious jokes about how terrible it is. And dislikes.
Let me tell you. If you “dislike” this video on YouTube, you are boring and bad. Just like specifically hating Nickelback is for sheeple with no actually interesting tastes, disliking an obviously silly amateur video by some dude and a child is for people who have only seen the blandest of YouTube, who completely miss out on gold like a libertarian’s anti-public-park poem and Sherlock Holmes making out with the Little Mermaid and must split the differences between the mediocre shit they like and the mediocre shit they hate.
If you “disliked” that video, you are Nickelback. You are Uggs. You are Jim Belushi. And your parody of it will suck.
Watch the video. Give it a thumbs-up. Congratulate yourself on being so brave. »
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Gustavo Almadovar excels at saying his name
Gustavo Almadovar works for Eyewitness News in Orange County. When he signs himself off, it’s a chant, like he’s summoning his own spirit. Particularly when some newswatcher cuts together all his signoffs into a lilting montage.
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The Human Condition
The creator of this megamix of body-complaint commercials tags it with: “You start to feel better, before you die.”
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What wizards do when they overdose on potions
I love watching motion-graphics videos, but I always wonder why these techniques aren’t used more often in stories. This is the kind of concept you can see someone pitching and everyone in the room immediately going “Ohhh shit!”
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Your guide to all the presidents who matter
This woman names all the presidents ever and doesn’t miss any of them at all.
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Every relationship is like this couch.
‘The Couch’ is a one-minute sketch by Klepper and Grey, whom we like.
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Lil Ant’s “Bill Gates” is a good very-bad rap song, if you like very-bad rap songs.
Cole Stryker, lover of bad things, showed me this minimum-effort rap video for the minimum-effort song “Bill Gates” by Lil Ant.
Or maybe it’s a decent joke by an actually-good rapper, or maybe it’s a reverse-ironic viral placement that will get him on Ellen. I don’t know these things now.
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Intervention: Unfunny Dad
It can be super-hard to make a joke about an unfunny character be funny. It can also be super-hard to make an addiction joke funny. But this sketch by Harvard Sailing Team is funny. This dad represents not only all unfunny dads, but all unfunny semi-manic friends.
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Humanoid robot PET-PROTO’s thought process
Oh god. Oh god they built another test.
Okay. It’s a step. I can do steps. But oh god look how fucking big it is, what if I fucking fall, I can’t take that again, I’ve fallen so many times and when I do they go into me and they change me oh god oh god WHEW I’M ON THE STEP. YES. FUCK. YES oh fuck fuck hold on okay walls, good, got walls.
Now just eeaaase on down and… OUCH okay I think I’m okay let’s just hold onto the walls for a bit, whew, okay, doin’ great.
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So that’s what a gay demon sounds like
This is a man casting a gay sex demon out of another man. I mean not really, mostly because as everyone has pointed out, no gay demon would show up to church in that vest.
Of course it’s super-upsetting to see someone convinced that their sexuality is caused by a demon, so convinced that they find themselves pretending to be the demon. So let’s keep trying to not do that! And meanwhile laugh at the asshole preachers who pretend to cast out demons.
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Glenn Beck is selling USA-made patriot jeans because of course he is (also, America)
Remember when Glenn Beck had a TV show? He was crying all the time, and telling old people to put gold in mattresses, and just being a big ol’ right-wing goofball. Golly, I wonder what that fear monger’s been up to lately!
I mean, he’s still on the radio, right? I can only assume. Scared people LOVE the radio. And then beyond that, what could he be doing? Writing fan fiction about American presidents? Crying into flags? Participating in a lot of hot dog eating contests? Isn’t that how you’d imagine rich fat guys to spend their time? Kickin’ back with hot dogs?
Turns out, his next project is none of those things.
Glenn Beck is now selling the most American jeans that have ever existed. »
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Vitalic’s “Stamina”: A music video about murderous exercise
The story in this NSFW music video is so compelling that it’s honorarily comedy.
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“Guptill89 Presents Top Ten Hottest Female Sonic Character’s”
“She’s attractive and is the size of an average human mother.” A young man reviews sexually attractive female Sonic characters in a surprisingly compelling YouTube video.
I argued with Cole Stryker (who found this video on, like, Reddit) about whether kids have always so constantly appropriated terms like “since Valentine’s Day is around the corner…” and “Now we’re talkin’!” from bullshit pop culture until they sound like little Entertainment Weekly writers. I would like to believe that our childhoods were somewhat purer before internet-aided media saturation; he says our generation was just as terribly referential. WAT IS UR OPINION TELL US IN COMMENTZ
Watch the top-ten list of hot females from the Sonic the Hedgehog universe. »
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