A Financial Advisor Helped Me Make A Budget At Age 35, And This Is What I Learned

After years of interviewing financial pros, I know that a budget is a cornerstone of financial health, but I've never made one for myself. I just always assumed that as long as I was spending less than what I was making, I was all set. 

Turns out that's not the case.

In addition to being super relatable, Russo really, really likes working with numbers. She literally told me: "I love math; I mean, I'm obsessed with it." 

As a non-math person, I was sold. And she had no problem whipping my finances into shape in under an hour. 

Money brings up a lot of emotions (like anxiety and even shame), so Russo says you need to create an "honest, judgement-free space." She recommends bringing along a glass (or bottle!) of your favorite wine and putting on some relaxing music. Remember that a budget isn't black and white; it won't determine if you're a success or a failure, smart or stupid. 

As Russo so cleverly sums up: "It's impossible to know where you're going if you don't know where you are."

So with that, we dove in to figure out where I happen to be.

Your fixed expenses are costs that don't fluctuate. Your rent or mortgage, homeowners insurance, car payment, and cellphone bill are all likely fixed expenses. 

Also, keep in mind that there may be things like house and car maintenance on your budget template. Ashley suggested that I leave those blank unless they are reoccurring, monthly costs (like if I was big into home improvement projects or constantly souping up my car). Since I'm not into either, she said I could leave it off my budget since any home or car repairs would come out of my emergency fund and not be a monthly budget item.

Non-fixed expenses include everything from groceries and eating out to clothing purchases and travel. As the name implies, these numbers typically fluctuate from month to month. For example, your grocery bill over the holidays is likely much higher than it is in the summer, when you might be eating out with friends more often.

I did A LOT of guessing, which Russo said is totally fine. For an initial budget like this, she says, "This is a gut check, this first pass. It also gives you an idea on what you're not sure about."

In short, account for everything, but make sure you don't double up and accidentally count the same expense in two categories.

My two sticky areas were clothing purchases and travel. Russo said I showed a visible "guilty" emotional response to the first, even though it turned out that once my quarterly spending estimate was broken down into a monthly cost, it really wasn't a lot of money per month. 

Travel on the other hand (which I do a lot of) was super high. I even paused the entire process to question the number I initially came up with, thinking it was too high.

For me this was a fixed expense because I have an automatic transfer from my checking to my savings account every month, but for some people the amount that goes into savings may fluctuate (making it a non-fixed expense). 

Either way, this is a big one and the reason BEHIND the budget. According to Russo, the goal in budgeting is to understand your financial habits so you can start saving money and working toward retirement.

To retire one day, you'll need to know how much you spend in a month and how much savings you'll need to cover those costs in retirement. A budget tells you the former, but to determine how much money you should be saving for retirement you'll need to talk to a financial planner who knows how to plug in all the right numbers, ask all the right questions, and take into account things like inflation, taxes, and the market.

This step is key. Russo says that in retirement, "You don't depend on a paycheck to pay for travel or groceries. What you saved after all those years working is how you pay for that. ... It's not just about covering fixed expenses; it's about maintaining the lifestyle you live today." And while blindly putting money in a savings account is great, without a forward-thinking financial plan, "You have no idea if it's going to help you arrive at your destination."

Chances are you're going to forget something, so Russo recommends adding an additional $100–$150 to your monthly budget to cover costs you forgot or things like random coffee runs.

Aka, the big reveal. 🤢

Like I said, I had a ton of guilt around the amount of money I spend on travel every year, but Russo assured me that "It does not matter if you're spending all your money on travel or clothes or following your favorite band across the country, as long as you have paid yourself the right amount so that you can be free of a paycheck one day."

In short, as long as you're covering all your necessities, have an emergency fund, and are saving for your future, if there's anything left over, you can spend it however you want.

You'll especially want to do the three-month check-in if you had a few non-fixed expenses you weren't sure about. In three months — if you did the separate credit card trick in No. 9 — you should have a clear idea of what you spend per month on those tricky non-fixed expenses on average.

"Having a budget check-in every three months is a good idea when you're solidifying it, and then updating it every year," said Russo.

While the budget made me feel fairly solid financially, it made me realize that just putting an obscure amount of money into an IRA each month might not be enough. I need to talk to a financial planner who can help me figure out how much money I need to contribute each month in order to retire when the time comes.

But I'll save that for another article...