The couch potato's college football TV guide
Welcome to another edition of The Couch Potato, where we make you better at watching TV. The responses have been mixed, at best. Some of the highlights:
Peter Bob Clampett:
"Pretty Woman" is on ABC Family. This person just lost all credibility. Why would anyone want to change a football game to watch one of the worst movies of all time?
Comment:
Lyle Leduc:
Get off that couch ....turn off that TV!.....losers!
Comment:You can turn off your TV only if you are watching this:
John Hatfield:
Mr. Foss....
A defense is not referred to as "absolutely unstoppable". A better choice would be "absolutely impenetrable".
Otherwise, pretty dead on with the games of the week.
Comment: Your critique is absolutely impenetrable.
Mike Anderson:
Comparing OU/ksu to a yawn stars marathon...(expletive) you Foss!!
Comment: Neither team is playing this weekend Mike, so here are five things you could watch instead:
1. Shaun of the Dead (12:30, Comedy Central)
2. Charlie's Angels (1, Oxygen)
3. The Last Boy Scout (12, TNT)
4. Any other football game available.
5. Paint drying.
If you have a comment, correction or just like spewing vitriol tweet @themikefoss or comment below. Chances are it will end up in an installment of The Couch Potato.
Now, for the picks (note: all times EST for Saturday 9/29) ...
NOON PICK
No. 24 Baylor at No. 7 West Virginia/Noon, FX
What you need to know: West Virginia's first Big 12 game will be against a team averaging 51.3 points per game. Fortunately for the Mountaineers, Baylor is also conceding nearly 30 points per game. Commence scoring of touchdowns.
Why you will watch: Points will be scored. Remember when Baylor gave up 42 points last week to Louisiana-Monroe? Remember when Geno Smith was No. 2 in the nation in passing yards per game (378.3)? Neither team plays defense, both are absurd on offense, and if we have learned anything from Oregon-Arizona, it's that one of these teams will score 50 and the other will be shut out.
What's on the other channel:The Last Boy Scout is on TNT, the wildly under appreciated 3:10 to Yuma is on USA at 11:30, and my favorite, Notting Hill, is on WE starting at 10 a.m.
Potatoes: 3.5/4
PRIME TIME PICK
No. 10 Texas at No. 22 Oklahoma State/7:30, FOX
What you need to know: Somehow, Texas went from losing five games last year to the top 10 this year with little adversity. Oklahoma State is the first true test of this Longhorns team. Cowboys quarterback Wes Lunt might not play because of a knee injury, which would put the ball in the hands of freshman J.W. Walsh (496 yards, 6 TD, 1 INT in two appearances this year.)
Why you will watch: This is a game between two teams which may or may not be truly legitimate. Oklahoma State gave up 59 points to Arizona while averaging 62.3 ppg. Texas has yet to play a team capable of offering a true challenge. Saturday night is the proving ground for both teams.
What's on the other channel: Major Payne, a cinematic classic if there ever were one, is on BET. Aladdin is on at 8 p.m. on ABC Family. Finally, a Jersey Shore marathon is going down on MTV.
Potatoes: 3/4
LATE-NIGHT PICK
No. 21 Oregon State at Arizona/10, Pac-12
What you need to know: The Beavers haven't started a season 3-0 since 2002. Arizona just suffered a 49-0 embarrassment at the hands of Oregon.
Why you will watch: The Wildcats followed up an impressive 59-point performance against Oklahoma State with exactly zero points against Oregon in a blowout. Now, Arizona must face Oregon State, which is a team that has started the season with wins against two ranked teams. It's a confounding matchup, because both teams are either grossly over or under performing.
What's on the other channel:Kill Bill: Vol. 1 (aka the better one) is on Bravo. American Gangster is on TNT. Get Smart is on TBS, and finally Mean Girls is on VH1.
Potatoes: 3/4
OTHER RANKED TEAMS ON TV
Tennessee at No. 5 Georgia/3:30, CBS: The SEC's two best offenses square off in Athens.
No. 16 Clemson at Boston College/3:30, ESPN2: This is a compelling game if there were other teams playing.
No. 25 Virginia Tech vs. Cincinnati/3:30, ESPNU: This game is being played at FedEx Field (home of the Redskins), making it potentially the best football seen at FedEx Field in more than a decade.
No. 4 Florida State vs. South Florida/6, ESPN: It will be a (moral) victory for South Florida if it can score more than 10 points and limit Florida State to 50.
Ohio State at No. 18 Michigan State/3:30, ABC: If Ohio State can pull off a win, expect the Buckeyes to contend for the BCS Championship ... oh wait, they can't.
Towson at No. 3 LSU/7, ESPNU: This is a must-watch game if you enjoy watching the slaughter of the weak.
No. 6 South Carolina at Kentucky/7, ESPN2: Don't worry Kentucky fans, basketball season is close.
No. 14 TCU at Southern Methodist/7, FSN: The Horned Frogs are the second-most exciting game in Texas during prime time this week. Texas-Oklahoma State is a must-watch.
No. 17 Louisville at Southern Mississippi/8, CBSSN: Louisville is 4-0 but only a 10-point favorite against 0-3 Southern Mississippi. The Big East: Striking fear in the hearts of football teams since NEVER.
No. 23 Wisconsin at No. 20 Nebraska/8, ABC: I'm going to watch this game for five minutes, which is enough time to screen grab the TERRIBLE uniforms that will debut.
Mississippi at No. 1 Alabama/9:15, ESPN: There is no need to watch the Crimson Tide until late October. 'Bama wins by 40. Next game.
No. 2 Oregon vs. Washington State/10:30, ESPN2: If you don't have the Pac-12 Network, this Oregon mauling-waiting-to-happen is your only option. Sorry.