LeSean McCoy and Osi Umenyiora have squashed their beef

LeSean McCoy says the beef he started with Osi Umenyiora and eventually included back-and-forths about Mother's Day, Lady Gaga, ballerinas and softness is now over, signaling a devastating blow for American discourse.

The Philadelphia Eagles running back and New York Giants defensive end squashed the battle after Philly's 19-17 win on Sunday night.

"We crossed paths a couple times [during the game], we gave each other the eye," McCoy told WIP's Player's Lounge show. "In the warmups, we looked at each other funny. [...] After the game [Umenyiora] said 'you're a heck of a player, we're in this business, let's get over this.' He said, 'let's be done with it.'"Being a bigger man, also for myself, you've got to focus on the Giants, they're a good team already. My goal is not an inter-division battle with Osi. It's with the Giants, and trying to get to the Super Bowl."

What? That's it? You don't get to just say "I'm out!" That's not how it works, LeSean. You called the guy a ballerina on national television six days ago! Then your team squeaks out a game on a missed field goal and you declare the feud over? That's like punching someone in the back of the head and running away.

This is a disappointment, to say the least. Sure, it's not mature for two grown men to be tweeting "Happy Mother's Day" to each other and making comparisons to small dogs. But do digs like those, and the more subtle ones (McCoy saying Osi is fourth-best defensive end on Giants; Osi conspicuously pointing out that the Eagles have no titles), make intra-divisional games more fun? Of course! Those Ali-Frazier fights aren't classics because they were jump roping together and singing Kumbaya before the fights. A little bad blood is good for business.

But our rational side applauds McCoy and Umenyiora. Unless they're squashed early, feuds tend to end one of three ways: death of one or both parties, in a triumphant concert finale that leads to a mediocre collaboration or they don't end and are chronicled 150 years later by a Kevin Costner miniseries on basic cable. Nobody wants any of that.