Athletics' Neshek makes emotional return

DETROIT -- Oakland Athletics reliever Pat Neshek didn't know if he wanted to pitch again this year, and for a time this week, didn't really care about baseball.

Four days ago, he said, was the happiest day of his life, with his wife, Stephanee, delivered their first baby Tuesday.

A day later, he and his wife were making plans to bury their son, Gehrig John Neshek.

Yet, he rejoined the team Friday, came into pitch Saturday, retired the only two batters he faced, and walked off the field fighting off tears.

He patted his arm with the patch of his son's initials that the entire team wore, looked into the heavens, and then glanced in the stands to look for his wife.

"I don't think we'll ever get over it,'' Neshek said Friday night, his voice cracking, trying to hold back the tears. "It's tough. We had the baby, and put a lot of pictures up (on Facebook and Twitter). Then, you get a call, and they're asking where you want to bury your son. It's hard to process any of it.''

Athletics manager Bob Melvin said it was an easy decision to add Neshek to the roster once he said he wanted to come back.
"Well, we talked about it when we heard he wanted to come back quickly,'' Melvin said. "I think the fact he hasn't been out that long, actually a little bit of rest as far as his arm goes.

It was actually a very easy decision. It's something he wanted to do. He wanted to get here sooner than later. He wanted to be here for his team. He wanted to help his team out in a very difficult time for him, and that made it pretty easy to add him to the roster and make him available today.''

Neshek had left the team on Monday night to be with his wife for the birth in Melbourne, Fla. Everything seemed normal. The baby was healthy. Neshek left the hospital and went home to watch the A's play their eventual AL West-clinching game against Texas on TV.

He got a phone call in the fifth inning from Stephanee.

The baby had stopped breathing.

They spent the night together crying, but no one knew, and they still were getting text messages and e-mails from friends and fans congratulating them on the birth.

"We were locked up in the house," Neshek said. "It was really hard. We sat up all night. We didn't know what to do. We didn't know what to do. People were sending us texts of congratulations and stuff.

"I can imagine that's what hell is like.''

So Neshek went to his Facebook and Twitter accounts, and broke the horrible news: "Please pray for my family. Tonight my wife & I lost our first & only son 23 hours after he was born with no explanation," Neshek posted on Twitter. Stephanee later added, "There was no cause of death and I am having trouble understanding why God can let such a thing happen an innocent being."

There will be an autopsy, Neshek said, but no matter what the findings, it won't bring back their son.

"I remember other people would have babies, and I thought, "Ah, not that big of a deal,''' Neshek said. "But that's probably the best day I ever had. The one day. I'd go through it again just for that one day.

"It was pretty awesome.''

It will take time to heal, and as Neshek said, the pain will never go away. Yet, for now, he and Stephanee know they made the right choice to come to Detroit and rejoin the team for the American League Division Series playoffs. They are with friends and family who can help the painful healing process.

"It was a great decision; my wife recommended it,'' Neshek said. "I was fine with whatever she wanted. But the first thing she said was, 'I need to get out of here and some baseball.' I just wanted to be by her side to get through this.

"This is really good for me. It really takes your mind off al lot of the bad stuff that happened. It's a very good way of healing, putting the pieces back together.

"It's tough, but I've been getting a lot of support from the guys and other players around baseball, guys I played with, fans of baseball, and that's really helped us.

"If nothing else, you kind of wanted to do it in my son's honor, to come back."