Tuesday Truth Squad: Longhorns, Lasers and John L.

• The solution to Florida State's goalpost problem is a good kicker.
• The Arkansas coaching staff is recruiting for next season. For real
• Ferentz would go Greyhound over a charter jet?

It's too simplistic to say the Longhorn Network caused all the major conference realignments of the past few years, but when history looks back on the near-Armageddon that took place in 2010 and 2011, there is no doubt that Texas' television network played a major role in the undercurrents of dysfunction that reshaped the Big 12.

Who knows: If the Longhorn Network never happened (and the ESPN-funded $300 million windfall that came with it), Texas A&M and Nebraska may have never had a good reason to leave.

So it's hilarious now, two years after the Big 12 nearly tore apart over Texas' advantages, to hear Mack Brown bemoan the Longhorn Network's existence.

Brown's weekly press conference Monday revealed the following complaints: He spends six hours per week taping interviews and other LHN-related programming commitments, there are TV cameras intruding on meetings and opponents can gain an advantage by watching the televised portion of Texas' practices.

"Like I said, I didn't ask for it," Brown said, according to the Houston Chronicle. "We were given a deal we had no input in, and we've been trying to make it the best we can for both (UT and ESPN)."

Is this perfect or what?

Texas is 5-2 but gave up 50 points last week to Baylor, and there's been a lot of talk swirling about Brown's future and how long the school will put up with this kind of mediocrity.

Now Brown is complaining because the Longhorn Network – which was supposed to give Texas even more financial and exposure advantages – is draining too much of his time and hurting the product Texas puts on the field.

While Brown's complaints may be valid, this would fall under the category of Boo Freaking Hoo. If you create Frankenstein, don't be surprised when he tries to kill you.

And with that, it's time for our weekly look at which college coaches are using their weekly press conferences to spin. It's the Tuesday Truth Squad.

Florida State coach Jimbo Fisher on whether he thought a missed field goal by his kicker last week at Miami should have been called good.

"You'd think there would be some kind of laser they could shoot up. I'm not joking about that. Because even for the officials underneath, it's very tough (to see) what goes on. Like they have in tennis; you'd think they'd be able to do that because guys kick it so high. We're kicking a 40-yarder to win it at Virginia game last year that was right over the top, after all that? Just for the clarity of the game, you've got replays and things, you'd think you'd have that."

The Truth Squad has taken it easy this year on Fisher, who always seems willing and able to rationalize what is becoming chronic underachievement at Florida State. Now the Seminoles need lasers to help them win football games?

We kid Fisher, of course, but this is not something we endorse. Even with all the excesses in college sports, the line should be drawn somewhere well short of lasers. Frankly, it's a ridiculous suggestion.

For the most part – probably 99 out of 100 times – it's very easy to tell whether a field goal is good or not. While instant replay technology should be employed to make sure calls are correct, this is not a major issue that plagues the sport. How many times do you remember a field goal call being incorrect? It's simply not worth the massive cost, which is why you won't see it in college football or the NFL any time soon.

This is revealing, though, because it exposes Fisher as the embodiment of the paranoid head coach, always wondering what conspiracy is working against them. Fisher has clearly put a lot of thought into the possibility that his kicker will make an important kick by an inch but have it called no-good by officials. But we ask this of Fisher: What is the easier solution to this (potential) problem? Installing expensive lasers in every stadium in America or just recruiting a better field-goal kicker?

Arkansas coach John L. Smith on recruiting during the bye week:

"Good. We all got out and got some evaluations done and got to a lot of games. We got to visit with a lot of coaches. From that standpoint it was really good to get some time. We are kind of right in the middle of the year to get out. Reception has been great. It was something we needed to get done and we were on one end of the country to the other. From that standpoint it was real good."

What?

It's well-established that Smith is the most optimistic bankrupt interim coach in the history of college football, but come on. While the Truth Squad doesn't question the effort of the Arkansas' coaching staff, at what point does this charade stop? Smith isn't going to be Arkansas' coach next season, and most (if not all) of the current staff will be ushered out as well. Nobody knows who the new coach will be or what system he'll employ offensively or defensively.

In other words, there's no point to recruiting right now. It's a complete waste of time and resources. What do you even say to a prospect, his family or his high school coach? "We both know that I won't be back at Arkansas next season, but you should go there anyway?" Given the situation, making a cosmetic effort to recruit right now is silly.

Oh, but the "reception has been great." OK then.

Iowa coach Kirk Ferentz, on whether it's more difficult to take a bus to take Northwestern than charter airplane:

"Maybe relative to pre‑ 9/11, perhaps. Because in the old days you'd get on a plane, go to the airport, get on a plane and be there. Although going to Chicago is never easy. Because any time you're flying into a metropolitan area, it's always a challenge getting through the airport. But now with security and all that stuff, I don't know if taking a plane is any great treat."

I think in a lot of ways getting on a bus is almost therapeutic. It gives you four hours where you're not totally out of touch. Nobody's out of touch anymore with technology. But at least you're here, it's four hours where everybody can relax and enjoy the ride"

Let's be honest here. Doesn't Iowa have bigger problems these days than whether it's taking a luxury bus or a charter airplane to a road game?

Now, to be fair, Ferentz was asked a question and answered it. But if you take a step back, this is ridiculous on every level. Iowa is 4-3, just got smacked 38-14 by a Penn State team under heavy NCAA sanctions and is a 6-point underdog this weekend to Northwestern. The program is in a freefall, and Ferentz is analyzing the difficulty and ease of getting to Chicago? Who cares?

And memo to Ferentz: However difficult it may be for you to get through security at the charter terminal, it's about 10 times harder for those of us who fly commercial. Deal with it.