No square to spare: Toilet paper theft prompts parks service to remind visitors to bring supplies

When you need to wipe, you don’t want to find the toilet paper has been swiped.

The guaranteed solution is to bring your own to the park, Delaware Water Gap National Recreation Area reminded visitors Friday morning in a Facebook post.

“Our thin one ply toilet paper was just too tempting to a bathroom burglar last week. They absconded with our toilet paper and hand sanitizer!” the park posted, under a quote from the "Seinfeld" scene in which Elaine unsuccessfully sought a few squares from her stall neighbor.

The sad photo in the post featured a totally empty dispenser, the front hanging down and broken.

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“If you are coming to recreate in the park, we recommend that you bring your own supplies with you in case of TP thievery. If you witness theft in the park, please call our Emergency Communications Center at 800-543-4295,” the park said.

As one Facebook commenter noted, the move may have been born of desperation: “I don’t agree w theft. But imagine why they would want to steal those items? This isn’t an easy time for a lot of people.”

Maybe the thief – still reeling from toilet paper shortages at the start of the pandemic –  was trying to stock up their stash.