Trump Family Values

Ivanka Trump: People Don’t Want to Be Handed Jobs—They Want to Pull Themselves Up by Their Bootstraps Like Me

“This idea of a guaranteed minimum is not something most people want.”
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Ivanka Trump comes from a long line of assholes who confuse inheriting money with hard work. For years, her father, Donald Trump, has claimed to be a self-made man when, in fact, he received hundreds of millions from his dad, beginning with $200,000 a year in today’s dollars at age three. Fred Trump also bailed his son out of a number of historically dumb business decisions, including somehow bankrupting a casino. Ivanka and her brothers Don Jr. and Eric have only ever worked for Daddy, or started crappy companies with his money. Ivanka’s husband, Jared Kushner, has taken a similar path, using his convict father’s cash to buy and destroy a newspaper, and working for the family business, where he probably would’ve been fired were it not for his ties to the boss. The First Daughter and her spouse have, of course, been employed at the White House for the last two years as senior advisers to the president, roles they’re not remotely qualified to hold. They also collect millions of dollars a year for doing nothing. Yet, according to Princess Purses, a government proposal to guarantee every American a job is a terrible idea that no one should support.

In an interview with Fox News that will air on Sunday, Ivanka was asked what she thought about Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s Green New Deal, specifically the part of the plan that ensures “a job with a family-sustaining wage . . . to all people of the United States.” What would she say to “people who will see that offer from the Democrats . . . and think, ‘Yeah, that’s what I want’”? host Steve Hilton wondered. To which the heiress, who has literally been handed everything her entire life thanks to federal housing subsidies her grandfather received from the government, responded: “I don’t think most Americans, in their heart, want to be given something. I’ve spent a lot of time traveling around this country over the last four years. People want to work for what they get. So, I think this idea of a guaranteed minimum is not something most people want. They want the ability to be able to secure a job.”

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Like her father, Ivanka’s comments often need to be translated from their original Trump to be remotely comprehensible, and here, it’s not totally clear what the hell she’s talking about. A federal-jobs guarantee would, of course, not preclude people from obtaining employment on their own, and if people “want to work for what they get,” they’d be in luck, since, outside of corrupt family businesses and lemonade stands that involve forcing your chauffeur and bodyguard to buy all of your product, jobs usually involve working.

Oh, and speaking of jobs, did you hear the one about how the First Daughter created millions of them?

President Donald Trump touted his daughter/senior adviser Ivanka for having “created millions of jobs” in a speech to the bipartisan National Governors Association Monday.

“My daughter, Ivanka, who is going to be speaking later, is—she has been so much involved. So incredibly involved,” Trump said. “My daughter has created millions of jobs. I don’t know if anyone knows that, but she’s created millions of jobs.”

No one knows that, because it’s not true at all—but this family has never been one to let the facts get in the way of a con.

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