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Billions

Welcome back to The Billions Recap Reality Index, this time covering the events of the second episode (“Naming Rights”).

This week’s show took a more serious and realistic tone than episode one, focusing more closely on the impending showdown between hedge fund manager Bobby Axelrod (Damian Lewis) and US Attorney for the Southern District of New York, Chuck Rhoades (Paul Giamatti).

It’s apparent that the show’s creators consulted with finance professionals and the real life SDNY US Attorney’s office with a lot of the details shown in the episode. That said, there were still some notable missteps, which we total below:

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THE BILLIONS REALITY INDEX*

REALER THAN A HEDGE FUND MANAGER’S WIFE WHO’S A DICTATOR WITH THE HELP

Bobby Axelrod, like all respectable finance professionals, calls a goldbug telling him to “BUY GOLD!” a lunatic.
PLUS 1

A D Bag trader into doing the fist bump exploding thing.
PLUS 1 because they exist and they are the worst.
Bobby’s outside counsel advises him the real danger is the redemption death spiral that happens when investors learn there is an investigation and pull their money.
PLUS 2

Bobby Axelrod stands up to pledge a million dollars at a charity event
PLUS 1 because this happens every year at Paul Tudor Jones’ Robin Hood gala.
A morning ideas session happens at Axe Capital where trading ideas are kicked around and torn apart.
PLUS 1 for the typically Monday morning pow wows that happen at many funds
Bobby says their hedge fund demands 3 & 30 for management fee and performance fee, above the standard 2 & 20 (SAC’s Cohen charged 3 & 50)
PLUS 2

Under intense grilling, an Axe Capital trader tries to claim his trade was based off an “event driven macro play.” Gets immediately called out for bullshitting that nonsense.
PLUS 1
After the big reveal that the SEC investigation was actually part of a compliance training session, the collective response is “These assholes work here now?”
PLUS 3 because everyone hates compliance and compliance training.
Bobby Axelrod places a $100 million bid for the naming rights on a building.
PLUS 1 because that’s how much Blackstone Group head honcho Stephen Schwarzman donated to get his name on the New York Public Library’s flagship building (and then he totally skipped the ribbon-cutting ceremony!)
Axelrod got an employee blacklisted and put out word to recruiters no one is allowed to hire him. That can actually happen. And with the trading commission revenue banks get from hedge funds, they want to keep them happy.
PLUS 1

Characters visited a rub and tug joint. Nuff said.
PLUS 1
Setting up for an arrest of Birch, someone at the US Atty SDNY office asks if the press will be there. They’re told that the press have a funny way of always being there for a perp walk.
PLUS 1
A fund manager who was a caddy for rich kids growing up?
PLUS 1 because that actually happened. Hedge fund titan Ray Dalio was a caddy growing up, and like Bobby Axelrod, would caddy for six dollars each, and carry double bags.
“You mean we are here because of that ancient bullshit?” Yes. A fund manager would hold on to a crazy grudge forever. And be willing to spend a hundred million to win.
PLUS 2

POINTS FOR REAL: PLUS 19

FAKER THAN A HEDGE FUND PSYCHOLOGIST DOING HR’S WORK OF CLEANING UP A FIRING

Bobby Axelrod and his wife vaping pot outside the entrance of a charitable event. Not happening.
MINUS 1
Why is the Axe Capital COO going so hard in the paint? Other traders or PMs would be doing the grilling at the meeting, COO is typically more focused with risk management, and wouldn’t be weighing in on trading or research.
MINUS 2
After Axe fires him, the trader tells security to get their hands off his cellphone while he’s using it. If it were a work-provided phone, it would have been taken already. If he were using a personal one linked to work, it would be server side wiped before he took a step outside of the office. Hedge funds take guarding their data very seriously.
MINUS 2

While out getting donuts with his kids, Chuck Rhoades sees someone he convicted out with his kids and tries paying for his donuts (and hilariously ends up with powdered sugar and a donut imprint on his coat).
MINUS 1 because a US Attorney has no pity for someone they convicted.
Why is Axe Capital COO Mike Wagner dealing with a jittery LP who might put in a redemption request to pull money from the fund? Investor relations would be handling that job.
MINUS 1
While trying to smooth over a trader who was fired, Wendy mentions that a guy got fired from Axe Capital for complaining about his bonus.
MINUS 2 because even if you got a monster one, it’s a poor showing not to publicly bitch about how you deserved an even bigger bonus.

When discussing the fund’s performance, Wags says “We’ve crushed the S&P seven years in a row.” NOPE.
MINUS 2 because that isn’t a benchmark used to measure hedge fund performance and the COO of a fund would certainly know better.
After Birch decides to cop to a deal rather than face trial, the blackmailed attorney at SDNY sent a tip out to Axe’s fixer in a text message. That would NEVER happen!
MINUS 3 because that’s as dumb as putting “LDL” in an email. The job of those attorneys is to bust idiot traders for using texts and emails to communicate sensitive info, she’d know better than to do that herself.

POINTS FOR FAKE: MINUS 14

OVERALL CUMULATIVE SCORE ON THE BILLIONS RECAP REALITY INDEX:

PLUS 5 FOR THE WEEK
PLUS 9 ALL-TIME

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While there were a couple hiccups, the second episode of Billions was a stronger showing than the first, both in how realistic it was as well as getting more focused about the main plot. With episode two, we’re taking a profit of +5 and maintaining our buy rating on the show, predicting it will continue to get stronger as the war between Axe and Rhoades heats up. Stick with us when we recap Episode 3 next week and see if Billions can continue to protect against the downside.

[You can stream Billions on Showtime Anytime, or on Hulu and Amazon Prime Video with a Showtime subscription]

*We’d be remiss if we didn’t tip our caps to Jessica Pressler and Chris Rovzar; their seminal Gossip Girl Reality Index recaps for New York Magazine’s Intelligencer provided significant inspiration for this recap style.

Comfortably Smug is a government relations professional with a focus on the financial services industry. He can be found on Twitter with his musings on all things finance and politics at @ComfortablySmug