As Bridget Jones once told us, “it is a truth universally acknowledged that when one part of your life starts going okay, another falls spectacularly to pieces.” So when comedian Tiff Stevenson felt her life had been upturned by Donald Trump’s victory in the U.S. presidential election, she turned to Twitter to stitch things back together.
Inspired by one of PEOTUS’ tweets, which she previously told Mashable rang familiar to the voice of Jones, the London-based stand-up performer created Bridget Trump’s Diary</em. The account crafts daily tweets from a fictional version of the president-elect on topics from Meryl Streep’s Golden Globes speech and Brexit to the repeal of Obamacare and the lack of A-list celebrities willing to participate in Trump’s inauguration ceremony — all written in Jones’ pithy style.
BRIDGET TRUMP
January -An exceptionally bad start
Drunk tweeted Assange
Calories consumed -6,000 but mainly the hopes & dreams of the poor
— BRIDGETTRUMPSDIARY (@BRIDGETTRUMPSD1) January 8, 2017
“January -An exceptionally bad start. Drunk tweeted Assange. Calories consumed -6,000 but mainly the hopes & dreams of the poor,” one tweet reads. Another declares: “Resolution 1: Obviously will lose twenty pounds. Number 2: Repeal Obamacare. WILL NOT borrow money off dad. N.B. Poker chips aren’t edible.”
BRIDGET TRUMP
January -An exceptionally bad start
Drunk tweeted Assange
Calories consumed -6,000 but mainly the hopes & dreams of the poor
— BRIDGETTRUMPSDIARY (@BRIDGETTRUMPSD1) January 8, 2017
Though Bridget Trump’s Diary — which starred Renee Zellweger in the lead role — is relatively lighthearted in nature, it tackles serious issues and reframes them at a fresh angle. Stevenson said Trump could learn a few things from the fictional character, who was created by author Helen Fielding, as he takes hold of the most powerful position in the world.
“She is likable and when she makes a mistake she owns it rather than point the finger of blame at others,” she told Mashable. “Also, Bridget is always trying to improve herself and reach higher. Donald thinks he is tremendous (just the way he is) and won’t tolerate any difference in that opinion.”
Check out some of the best Bridget Trump’s Diary tweets below.
BIG work day
Must. Look. Busy & carry lots of folders
Can't reveal I spend all day thinking about Vlad
Am super important business woman!
— BRIDGETTRUMPSDIARY (@BRIDGETTRUMPSD1) January 11, 2017
Am doing so well at top super new job that hasn't started yet. I've already decided what my pay rise will be in 2020 #keepbridgetgreatagain
— BRIDGETTRUMPSDIARY (@BRIDGETTRUMPSD1) January 18, 2017
Noon. New York : Golden Tower
Ugh. Last thing on earth I feel emotionally equipped to do is inauguration.
Lunch -mainly eating my feelings
— BRIDGETTRUMPSDIARY (@BRIDGETTRUMPSD1) January 18, 2017
11AM
Urgh! Awful media witch hunt 2day!
Buzz feed are total bastards, can't they see I'm tremendous?
Alcohol – 0
Jobs created – 1,000's
— BRIDGETTRUMPSDIARY (@BRIDGETTRUMPSD1) January 11, 2017
Reply To – Vladimir Putin
Subject – RE Serious Problem
Appalled* by managements blatant election fixing
*Hugely turned on
— BRIDGETTRUMPSDIARY (@BRIDGETTRUMPSD1) January 10, 2017
Flirty email 2day!
From – Vlad Putin
Subject – Serious Problem
What has happened to Russian diplomats?
Are Russian diplomats off sick?
— BRIDGETTRUMPSDIARY (@BRIDGETTRUMPSD1) January 10, 2017
Kelly Anne told me Vile Meryl said a awful thing about me at an awards do. Heard she is a democrat, very cruel race.
Ate pudding from M&S
— BRIDGETTRUMPSDIARY (@BRIDGETTRUMPSD1) January 9, 2017
Hate dishonest Meryl! Must center myself more. Will ask Pence about appropriate self-help book, possible Eastern-religion-based.
Weight-270
— BRIDGETTRUMPSDIARY (@BRIDGETTRUMPSD1) January 10, 2017
Invited to Theresa May's turkey curry buffet. Nigel F will be there apparently he is top human rights abolitionist that mother is keen on
— BRIDGETTRUMPSDIARY (@BRIDGETTRUMPSD1) January 11, 2017
I WILL NOT
Waste money on: unaffordable health care , tax , planned parenthood, moving to Washington or exotic underwear
— BRIDGETTRUMPSDIARY (@BRIDGETTRUMPSD1) January 13, 2017
Lovely catch up w/ Gove
Told him 'Bridget Trump thinks Brexit is tremendous'*
*Don't really know what Brexit is but enjoy sounding important
— BRIDGETTRUMPSDIARY (@BRIDGETTRUMPSD1) January 16, 2017
Why oh why doesn't anyone want to play at the inauguration?
What if I die alone & am found 3 weeks later half eaten by an Alsatian?
— BRIDGETTRUMPSDIARY (@BRIDGETTRUMPSD1) January 15, 2017