Michelle! The one-half

Prior to the 2020 race, I predicted Michelle Obama would be the Democrat/Socialist/Communist (D/S/C) Party nominee. I was sort of wrong. “Sort of” only if one assumed the Obamas have not been enjoying a third term and angling for a fourth. Since then, I’ve continued to keep an eye on Michelle, who, we are assured, hates politics and absolutely does not want to be president and will not run.  

Now we are told a Reuters/Ipsos poll predicts Michelle would beat Donald Trump 50 to 39. Perhaps, to save “our democracy,” Michelle would nobly sacrifice herself to ensure a fourth Obama term?

Why 50 to 39? Because she’s more than Kamala-sort-of-black? Because reporters have long drooled over her arms?  Because some of the messianic shine might rub off from Barack? Instead of being “the one,” she might be becoming—the title of one of her books--“the one-half?”

But what are Michelle’s qualifications for the office, other than being the first lady to the most malignant, America and American-hating narcissist ever to occupy the Oval Office?

Graphic: Twitter screenshot, 2015

Well, she had the school lunch portfolio and hastened through the “Healthy and Hunger Free Kids Act that all but starved a generation of school children. So “healthy” were their Michelle-mandated meals, kids wouldn’t eat most of the inedible, Dickensian gruel, and untold tons of food and millions of taxpayer dollars went to waste.

Graphic: Twitter screenshot, 2015.

She also demonstrated her political acumen with this:  

MICHELLE OBAMA sparked fury among voters after she admitted that campaigning for her husband Barack's first-term as President was "the first time in my adult life I'm proud to be an American".

Various pundits have long asserted Michelle doesn’t like people, and particularly dislikes Americans, who are—you guessed it—racist: 

She expressed difficulty in “knowing that after eight years of working really hard for this country, there are still people who won’t see me for what I am because of my skin color.”

Actually, the problem was, and is, Americans believe their own lyin’ eyes about her, which has nothing to do with her race.

There have also long been suggestions Michelle, like Barack was heavily influenced by Marxism. Her college writings remain under seal--probably not because she loves America so much. Academic accomplishments? Those are hidden too.

Apart from these contributions to the public welfare, what other experience does Michelle have that might be useful to a POTUS?  Business? She and Barack are making movies for Netflix, some 17 thus far are “acclaimed.” On closer examination, the acclimation appears to be primarily because Obama rather than because large numbers of Americans like what they’re producing.

She’s a lawyer.  Has she produced any notable legal writing or won any landmark cases? Uh, apparently not.

But she’s an author.  Surely that should count for something ? Maybe, if her four-ish books weren’t ghost written—it’s a family tradition.  Her “books” are “I’m so cool” tomes. 

"Writing BECOMING has been a deeply personal experience. I talk about my roots and how a girl from the South Side found her voice," she shared ahead of the book's release. "I hope my journey inspires readers to find the courage to become whoever they aspire to be. I can't wait to share my story."

Her books are, of course, “critically acclaimed,” because Obama, and garnered tens of millions in advances, also because Obama. Oh yes, she also ghostwrote “American Grown: The Story of the White House Kitchen Garden and Gardens Across America.”

Michelle Obama's first book was released while she was First Lady, detailing the White House Kitchen Garden through the seasons. Obama shares her struggles as a new gardener, and writes about gardens across the United States that have inspired her.

Oddly enough, Michelle showed no particular interest in gardening before becoming First Lady, however, her “gardening” did provide some “authentic” photo ops.

It seems Michelle’s primary qualification for the presidency, besides being THE FIRST really, truly black WOMAN--this was before Dems forgot what women are--First lady, is her arms: 

Michelle Obama's arms have been on people's minds since Barack Obama's 2008 campaign. Although Michelle's never been photographed in a bathing suit, she's rocked plenty of sleeveless dresses showcasing her toned arms. In 2008, campaign staff even wondered whether her bare arms made her look too formidable. Despite this concern, Michelle's arms remained highly visible throughout her husband's two presidential terms. "Sometimes I think half the reason Obama ran for president is so Michelle would have a platform to show off her biceps," joked David Brooks, an op-ed columnist for The New York Times.

Oh yes: Michelle also had a fitness initiative titled “let’s Move,” which apparently encouraged Americans to, well, uh…move.

Graphic: Michelle Obama participated in a Let's Move! event, 2013. Wikimedia Commons.org. Public Domain.

With qualifications like those, it’s no wonder she’s trouncing Donald Trump who doesn’t have her “toned arms” and only has one term as a white guy POTUS.

America breathlessly awaits the ascension of “the one-half.”

Mike McDaniel is a USAF veteran, classically trained musician, Japanese and European fencer, life-long athlete, firearm instructor, retired police officer and high school and college English teacher. He is a published author and blogger. His home blog is Stately McDaniel Manor. 

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