You try to protect your kids from the evil and horrors of this world but, despite your best efforts, some things are simply unavoidable.
5yo: “Daddy, I saw Lego Star Wars and Jar Jar Binks was SOOOOO FUNNY!!”
5yo: “I don’t think Momma wants to drive.”
Me: “Why not?”
5yo: “Because when you asked her to, she said ‘that’s fine’. Like this: ‘Fine.’”
Obviously.
(Comic created by PeanutGalleryComics.com. They make hand-drawn, custom comic strips out of your stories. Send in a photo and a story and their writers and illustrators do the rest!)
6yo: “Daddy? Can we watch a show?”
Me: “You know, they say that books are TV… for your BRAIN!”
6yo: “So TV is the same as books? WE’RE GOING TO WATCH SO MANY BOOKS!!!”
Me: “Wait, that’s not what I-”
Wife: “He kinda has you there.”
“Look Daddy, they’re playing Water Soccer!”
- 6yo, successfully explaining Water Polo to me for the first time.
Got a solid four hours of sleep before our make-up flight this morning. We’re all feeling refreshed and happy!
Southwest Airlines is giving us a surprise slumber party at the airport! I hope they know they’re on the hook for the s'mores and the spoooooooky stories!
Just saw a pilot rushing through the airport with his wife and young son. He looked late and stressed. If he can miss his flight, what chance do I have?
(Watching TV Ad)
Kit Harington: “A car should only be measured by one thing…”
6yo: “SPEED!!”
Kit Harington: “…how it makes you feel.”
6yo: “Pfffft.”
You just haven’t lived until you’ve cleaned dog poop from the tread of a child’s Samba Classic with nothing but a bottle of water, 1 napkin, 3 leaves, and your own bravery.