Neil Gaiman Tumblr FAQ: Good Omens

Tumblr questions that Neil Gaiman has already answered. A collection of Asks from Neil's blog (@neil-gaiman).

Good Omens FAQ Links: Main / Season 1 Doc Season 2 Doc Index of All Other FAQ Parts

This FAQ covers questions for the full content of both the book and TV series. There are spoilers. Please check this before messaging me: OrpiKnight's FAQ FAQ

*This post has been edited since the original.

Before you ask a Good Omens question, look here. An incredibly impressive job of research and gathering.

And if you have been here before it's time to look again. A lot has been added.

If anyone is wondering how ordinary fans can try and convince Amazon to make us Season 2 (and Season 3 when it arrives) DVDs: ask.

Send Amazon emails about the DVDs, chat to people on their call centers asking for the DVDs; call Amazon and ask about the DVDs. I don't know if Amazon has physical stores, but go there and ask about them. Tell them to send messages to their development department asking for this to be produced.

Amazon wants to make money, so if they see they could make money off of this, them they may be motivated to work out any legal issues and produce the DVDs. there's no guarantee but that's the best option we have.

@fuckyeahgoodomens has a whole blog on how to reach out to Amazon about this, so please check it out and start politely bugging them about this.

This came in the mail today!!! (It had a LONG journey thanks to some USPS mishaps but it’s finally here)

If you don’t know the Golden Notebook, they sell signed Neil Gaiman books for the cost of the book itself, which is incredible. Also @neil-gaiman is incredible to sign for them. (Plus you’re supporting local and small businesses!)

I still hope to one day maybe go to an event of his or meet him, but til then I have this. Thanks to Good Omens my life has been changed beyond what I can honestly comprehend sometimes. Cause who knew (not me!) that two ethereal, (often) man shaped beings in love could help me figure out my own identity in my mid 30s! Given it was the show first for me, but it’s still Neil, and his words and characters for which I am forever grateful.

*releases pack of dads into home depot* go……be free

invasive species encroach on lesbian territory

This is a common misconception because they’re such similar environments, but you should be aware that dads are native to Home Depot, while lesbians are actually native to Lowe’s. At this point, however, both dads and lesbians have made themselves at home in both Home Depot and Lowe’s to the point that trying to separate them back into their original ranges would probably do more harm than good to the delicate ecosystem of large chain hardware stores.

A properly raised and socialized Dad will be perfectly comfortable cohabiting with Lesbians. Its not really “encroaching on another’s territory”. You wouldn’t say that about foxes in a forest that also homes bobcats, would you? No. It’s just two different species that have both evolved to live in similar/the same environment. As long as they recognize each other as equals, Dads and Lesbians are more than capable of cohabitation.

Now, if you were to release a pack of Lumberjacks into a Lowes or Home Depot, that’s where chaos will reign. Being adapted to a far harsher and more demanding environment, the Lumberjacks would simply push Dads and Lesbians both out and also consume far more than a sustainable amount of resources. It would be like releasing bears at a country club.

As a former timber-harvester… I feel this is potentially accurate in theory. But highly improbable in actuality.

Lumberjacks, like most megafauna species generally require more space than the average hardware store, even a big box store could provide. The misconception is that Lumberjacks are a social species because of how they often work and live together.

This is a matter of necessity, not preference, and a survival technique for thriving under the LogBoss.

A “pack” of Lumberjacks, if not under the environmental pressure of a LogBoss will naturally disperse until they each have a wide territory.

Lumberjacks rarely fight for territory.

One on one, a Lumberjack could drive out a Dad or Lesbian, however the latter tend to travel in social packs.

Lumberjacks will passively retreat on the presence of large numbers of people. Kind of like Sasquatch.

Getting a “pack” of Lumberjacks assembled would be hard enough unless they were forced into a Hardware Store by a LogBoss. In that case, they would already be in a heightened and potentially agitated state far above their natural behavior. This artificial scenario can be likened to a circus animal running amok. If it had been in the wild, the incident would not have occurred.

Free-roaming Lumberjacks are the cryptids of the Hardware ecosystem. They are surprisingly quiet and unobtrusive.

Please stop labeling Lumberjacks as dangerous roving social predators. They are intermediate level omnivores and remarkably peaceful unless threatened.

As a hardware store worker I can say that this is all 100% accurate.

now how in the FUCK am i supposed to leave tumblr when a god tier post like THIS is just is just waiting for me daily?!?!?!

question where does the “art student” or “DIYer” “crafter” or “soap maker” or “miniaturist“ etc. who has ventured into the store for supplies fall into the ecosystem/what is their impact of said ecosystem?

Most of the above are native to craft and hobby stores (art students, historically, are native to museums, but having been introduced to hobby stores, have found a niche for themselves and thrived), but all can be seen in hardware stores on occasion due to territorial overlap. They are generally low-impact, as they tend to stick to specific small areas and primarily utilize different resources. While a large group of any of them can be disruptive (art students, in particular, are known to travel in packs), in general, they are more likely to have territorial disputes with one another than with the local fauna. 

A point of clarity -“crafter” is a bit misleading; while it conjures a specific image, much like ‘fish’ or ‘reptile’ it actually covers a broad array of wildly disparate species, and in general, more descriptive nomenclature is preferred. Fiber artists in particular are a genus to watch out for, particularly in groups. Beware a roving pack of domesticated quilters. They fear nothing, will go anywhere, and due to their social nature, will often seek interaction from other species that thrive best in solitude. They are quite friendly, and will happily adopt members of other species; the concern is that their adoptees do not always wish to be adopted. 

#in search of taxonomic precision and peaceful coexistence (via welkinalauda)

I do wonder how lesbian/bisexual lumberjack-mimickry fits into this

I can say as a former craft store worker that if you wish to see true fear, look into the eyes of a Dad who must venture into a craft store. Despite the overlap of familiar beings known to him from his native hardware store habitat, Dads are instinctively aware that craft stores are not for them; they contain unfamiliar perils and even the seemingly familiar may have strange variances and unnerving secrets. (”Why is this airbrush so small? What do you mean nails, why would you… WUT!!”)

Only experienced silverbacks or the boldest young Dads dare venture into a craft store for long without his mate or offspring to keep roving Craft Ladies at bay and guide him in this strange ecosystem. If a Dad enters with his mate and is separated from her, he will often scuttle for the seeming familiarity of Woodcrafts, Models, or Paints (the latter not to be confused with Fine Arts, unquestioned territory of art students), but he eyes Scrapbooking and Jewelry with trepidation and will usually venture into those exotic areas only in the company of females of his pack.

Lumberjacks are rarely spotted entering craft stores of their own volition, for while they do not fear it as Dads do, they know it is an environment unsuited for megafauna such as themselves.

Hardware store Lesbians generally adapt more easily to craft stores, although they may enlist another Lesbian of a subspecies more adapted to that environment to guide them until they find their niche. Lesbians have even been known to seek the aid of a Craft Lady, a native fauna that share similarities with Lesbians but are usually smaller and nimbler to suit their chosen habitat. Dads who witness this are often awed by the Lesbians’ temerity, for although larger, Dads are generally wary of the cunning and dexterous Craft Ladies and may mistake their enthusiastic pack greetings as predatory swarming.

Craft Ladies, secure in their ecological niche, have no fear of interlopers and take the presence of non-native beings in stride, although they may become territorial about scarcer resources.

The only truly invasive species that threaten craft stores are Brides-to-Be, who are mere annoyances individually, but like locusts may descend in hordes and lay waste, leaving swathes of destruction in their wake. Fortunately for the Craft Ladies, Brides-to-Be are seasonal and usually only a threat in the spring and early summer.

It Got Better

Is anybody going to address the newly invasive species of BuJo enthusiasts into the craft store/art supply store environment? Why aren’t we talking about the dangerous proliferation of Leuchtturm 1917s and the growing threat of Dotted Moleskins? I had to liberate a Dad from a tangle of washi tape in the art supply store the other day and it wasn’t pretty.

The natural habitat of journalers was stationary stores, which have been replaced by office supplies stores, not the same. Journalers invade the craft stores and art supplies stores to get the markers and washi tape and Sakura pens they require for survival.

@great-art-and-a-purple-tongue @onbearfeet THE LORE HAS BEEN UPDATED.

VERY IMPORTANT AND ENTIRELY ACCURATE now excuse me I gotta hit Lowes and Michaels.

Another thing to note is all of those habitats must adapt to the seasonal migration of goths. As soon as the faintest hint of spooky can be detected at those stores, goths will arrive in packs. A small pack of goths determined to forage can strip the shelves of a seasonal section bare in 30 minutes.

i wish i was famous in the 70s so i coulda gone on the muppet show and flirted with the muppets

Yeah, yeah. It’s all fun and games until Miss Piggy tries to fight you in the studio parking lot for “stealing her man.”

Here is the goggle doc on what to do! Even if you don’t need to live in New York, you can message the tourism board.

Do you live in New York state? Do you like being able to protect yourself from covid in a public space LEGALLY? Please do this.

If you do NOT live in New York state, please reblog this.

wtf new york

He also did the voice for the radio chunk in s1 Newt is listening of the clever buggers at the BBC.

It feels utterly insane that the BBC is even capable of entering into a contract where they don't get to show or part own a thing their studios create. because it's literally a public broadcaster. like, if it is funnelling time and energy and staff into making something that isn't shown on its own platforms it has failed during the process.

fingers crossed the contractual issues are surmountable!

BBC Studios is a part of the BBC that makes shows for other people, and brings in money that they use to make shows and supplement the license fee.

The Neil Gaiman/Dagfinn sweater pattern is free on ravelry!

I'm not goth enough for this I'm not goth enough for this I' not goth enough for this I'm not

*clicks link anyway*

Sorry folks, the pattern is NOT on Ravelry. That's just a landing page. It's on the creator's blog. (Of course it's by Joan of Dark. Of course it is. Her Geek Knits book is a treasure.)

Taking down the link to respect @joanofdark 's right to distribute as she wishes.

If anyone needs help finding the pattern let me know! I can talk you through it.

Can I suggest that people order Joan and Kyle's book from their local bookstore?

This is an amazon link so you know what you are ordering.

I told @mistresskabooms over and over again that she could come to me about anything, and I'd still love her tomorrow.

So... she did.

She asked me about what the words "wage gap" meant when she heard them on the news. She told me when her friends in elementary school were "pretending to be mean to their imaginary girlfriends," and she asked me if she'd done the right thing by leaving "and taking their girlfriends with me." She told me when the kids on the bus started calling her a faggot. She talked to me when she read Night in school.

And she told me she's a girl.

If kids don't feel safe coming to you about everything, they won't come to you about anything. Not anything that matters, anyway, because they won't be sure that the thing they're coming to you about won't get them into trouble.

But, of course, that's exactly the point here. These things - we know this, right? - aren't about "keeping kids safe." They're about control, and they're about keeping kids ignorant and - most of all - afraid.

If you are afraid of being contaminated mentally, of being accidentally ruined, of seeing something Bad and becoming Bad yourself, you become easier to control. If you understand that reading about something doesn't mean you agree with it, and that words and ideas may be scary but that simply knowing that an idea exists, or reading about a thing, does not make you that thing, you become much harder to control. You become harder to control because you become more able to test the things you think that you know against new ideas, things like "are gay people Bad, actually?" and "what if a pregnant person could have more legal rights than a corpse?" and "what did the water and sky look like before the EPA?" or "wouldn't ranked choice voting be neat?"

Just for starters.

The idea of "mental contamination" is big in Evangelical circles, but that ain't the only place, not by far. If you're thinking, "Man, that idea sounds like a concept that shows up a lot in leftist spaces and on Tumblr," you are correct.

This concept is a concept of control. It does not exist to make you stronger. It exists to make you afraid and to keep you from questioning yourself and the world around you. This lack of questioning becomes like wearing a cast around your leg forever. Technically, yes, it keeps your ankle safe, but in the process, the lack of exercise withers your calf muscle.

This leaves you with a worldview that cannot stand up to any kind of meaningful stress or challenge. Things are right because they're right, not because you can defend why they're right. These kind of default beliefs are fragile, soft, and easily shattered or shredded.

This shit doesn't protect kids. It makes them fragile and weak, unable to formulate worldviews they understand well enough to defend and worldviews strong enough to hold up to the rigors and stresses of life.

‘Kill two birds with one stone’ in European languages.

Good job, Poland, for being civilized.   Interesting hobby, Italy.

Nice ambiguous, free-floating aggression, France.

It’s how we roll, buddy. It’s how we roll.

I like the geographical separation of how people chose tools here. United Kingdom, Spain, Turkey, Russia, Estonia are using ranged weapons. France may indeed just be throwing rocks. Portugal has chosen to wield a stick, Germany has the correct tool for the specific job and Poland is indeed cooking. But Norway is slapping.