Ranking how effective the stars of Widows would be in an actual heist

Who would get away with a robbery?

widows_0HERO
Courtesy of TIFF

When pulling off a robbery, would you rather have Liam Neeson's very particular set of skills or Michelle Rodriguez behind the wheel? That's the question I couldn't stop thinking about while watching Widows, the star-filled heist movie from director Steve McQueen (an Oscar winner for Best Picture for 2013's 12 Years a Slave). And there really was only one way to settle this hypothetical — by ranking the cast, which also includes Viola Davis and Colin Farrell, by how useful they'd be in an actual heist. So crack open our rankings and see which star is the ideal thief.

12. Robert Duvall (Tom Mulligan)

WIDOWS
Twentieth Century Fox

Credentials: He was the consigliere to the legendary Corleone mafia family.

Verdict: All due respect to Don Corleone, but an 87-year-old wouldn't be at the top of the list when building a crew.

11. Elizabeth Debicki (Alice)

_Elizabeth-Debicki,
Fox

Credentials: The 28-year-old Australian actress is still on the rise, so she doesn't have as many experiences to pull from, but she was a doctor in Everest (always good in case someone gets wounded during the job) and she was the girlfriend of an arms dealer in The Night Manager.

Verdict: Not quite ready for the big-time, and, standing at well over 6 feet tall, she'd be very memorable for eyewitnesses.

10. Brian Tyree Henry (Jamal Manning)

Brian-Tyree-Henry
Fox

Credentials: In what will be a recurring theme here, Brian Tyree Henry has played a cop (White Boy Rick), so he has some insight into the other side of the law (though not as much as his multiple cop movie costars). And Paper Boi has a bit of experience in a life of crime, but selling some weed and owning a gun is a long way from pulling off a heist.

Verdict: His lone attempt at a robbery ended with him dead in Hotel Artemis, which usually isn't part of the plan.

9. Cynthia Erivo (Belle)

WIDOWS
Merrick Morton/Fox

Credentials: Have you seen those Widows biceps?!

Verdict: Cynthia Erivo needs a bit more of a track record before rising up the list. Although, her singing ability could be a nice distraction.

8. Jacki Weaver (Agnieska)

Jacki-Weaver
Fox

Credentials: She was the tough matriarch of the Cody crime family in the Animal Kingdom film.

Verdict: Being able to oversee the job is valuable, but even more valuable are multi-skilled soldiers.

7. Colin Farrell (Jack Mulligan)

WIDOWS
Twentieth Century Fox

Credentials: He has more than enough experience as a troubled cop (S.W.A.T., Miami Vice, True Detective), but his most relevant talents might have been picked up as Bullseye in Daredevil.

Verdict: He's kind of a one-trick pony — and a horrible boss.

6. Carrie Coon (Amanda)

WIDOWS
Merrick Morton/Fox

Credentials: She's taken out superheroes in Infinity War, seen how to frame someone up close in Gone Girl, and was a sinner in The Sinner.

Verdict: Her case to be on the team is almost as bulletproof as the vest that she wore on The Leftovers.

5. Liam Neeson (Harry)

WIDOWS
Twentieth Century Fox

Credentials: Besides having a "very particular set of skills"? The man has proven to kick ass on a plane, train, and snowplow. And that doesn't even include his work in Europe, the wars in the stars, and Gotham.

Verdict: As impressive as that set of skills is, they're kind of narrow. Clearly, he can beat up people — and wolves — but what else is he bringing to the table? Like, can he even drive? It's a necessary question considering he always seems to be a passenger.

4. Viola Davis (Veronica)

WIDOWS
Merrick Morton/Fox

Credentials: She's been a detective in Disturbia, granted Danny Ocean his release in Ocean's Eleven (she must have been in on it), and put together the Suicide Squad. Also, she's one award short of the EGOT, so, if the target is a Grammy award, then she'll have plenty of extra motivation. And, as the star of Fences, she will surely know where to unload the goods.

Verdict: She knows how to get away with murder, so she should need no help getting away with a robbery.

3. Jon Bernthal (Florek)

Jon-Bernthal
Fox

Credentials: His criminal history is impressive, between The Accountant, Baby Driver, and The Wolf of Wall Street, not to mention his experience on the other side of the law on Mob City and The Walking Dead. Let's not overlook surviving two seasons of a zombie apocalypse, especially considering you never know what you could encounter on a job.

Verdict: If you get a chance to have the Punisher in your crew, you take it.

2. Daniel Kaluuya (Jatemme Manning)

Daniel-Kaluuya
Fox

Credentials: He's survived the Mexican cartel (Sicario), extreme cardio (Black Mirror), betraying his superhero best friend (Black Panther), and visiting his girlfriend's murderous family (Get Out).

Verdict: The man can get out of anything!

1. Michelle Rodriguez (Linda)

WIDOWS
Suzanne Tenner/Fox

Credentials: She can fight (Girlfight), play cop (S.W.A.T.), lead a revolution (Machete), drive fast and furiously, steal DVD players, successfully fake her death, survive falling off a tank during a high-speed chase, fly a car, and bring people back to life by regaining her memory (multiple Fast & Furious movies).

Verdict: She's the total package.

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