Austin Grossman’s ‘Fight Me’

The cover of the Penguin edition of Austin Grossman's 'Fight Me.'ALT

On July 14, I’m giving the closing keynote for the fifteenth HACKERS ON PLANET EARTH, in QUEENS, NY. Happy Bastille Day! On July 20, I’m appearing in CHICAGO at Exile in Bookville.

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In Fight Me, the novelist and game developer Austin Grossman uses aging ex-teen superheroes to weigh the legacy of Generation X, in a work that enrobes its savage critique with sweet melancholia, all under a coating of delicious snark:

http://www.austingrossman.com/fight-me

It is, in other words, a very Gen X kinda novel. Prodigy (AKA Alex Beekman) is a washed-up superhero. As a nerdy high-schooler, he was given super powers by a mysterious wizard (posing as a mediocre teacher), who gave him an amulet and a duty. Whenever Alex touches the amulet and speaks the word of power, reaclun (which he insists is not “nuclear” backwards) he transforms into Prodigy, a nigh-invulnerable, outrageously handsome living god who is impervious to bullets, runs a one-minute mile, and fights like a champ. Prodigy, he is told, has a destiny: to fight the ultimate evil when it emerges and save the world.

Now, Alex is 40, and it’s been a decade since he retired both Prodigy and his Alex identity, moving into a kind of witness protection program the federal government set up for him. He poses as a mediocre university professor, living a lonely and unexceptional life.

But then, Alex is summoned back to the superhero lair he shared with his old squad, “The Newcomers,” a long-vacant building that is one quarter Eero Saarinen, three quarters Mussolini. There, he is reunited with his estranged fellow ex-Newcomers, and sent on a new quest: to solve the riddle of the murder of the mysterious wizard who gave him his powers, so long ago.

The Newcomers – an amped-up ninja warrior, a supergenius whose future self keeps sending him encouragement and technical schematics backwards through time, and an exiled magical princess turned preppie supermodel – have spent more than a decade scattered to the winds. While some have fared better than Alex/Prodigy, none of them have lived up to their potential or realized the dreams that seemed so inevitable when they were world famous supers with an entourage of fellow powered teens who worshipped them as the planet’s greatest heroes.

As they set out to solve the mystery, they are reunited and must take stock of who they are and how they got there (cue Talking Heads’ “Once In a Lifetime”). With flashbacks, flashforwards, and often hilarious asides, Prodigy brings us up to speed on how supers fail, and what it’s like to live as a failed super.

The publisher’s strapline for this book is “The Avengers Meets the Breakfast Club,” which is clever, but extremely wrong. The real comp for this book isn’t “The Breakfast Club,” it’s “The Big Chill.”

When I realized this, I got briefly mad, because I’ve only had two good movie high concept pitches in my life and one of them was “Gen X Big Chill.” Rather than veterans of the Summer of 68 confronting the Reagan years, you could have veterans of the Battle of Seattle living through the Trump years. One would be on PeEP, one would be an insufferable Andrew Tate-quoting bitcoiner, one would be a redpilled reactionary with a genderqueer teen, one would be a squishy lib, one a firebreathing leftist, etc. The soundtrack would just be top 40 tracks from artists who have songs on “Schoolhouse Rock Rocks”:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schoolhouse_Rock!_Rocks

Every generation has some way in which they seek to overthrow the status quo and build a new, allegedly better one, after all. “Big Chill”’s impact comes from its postmortem on a generation where it was easy to feel like you were riding destiny’s rails to greatness thanks to the sheer size of the Boomer cohort and the postwar prosperity they lived through. A Gen X Big Chill would be a stocktaking of a generation that defined itself as a lost generation reared in the Boomers’ shadows, armored against the looming corpo-climate apocalypse with the sword of irony and the shield of sincerity.

Which is basically what Grossman is doing here. What’s more, doing this as a superhero story is a genius move – what could be a better metaphor for a teen’s unrealistic certainty of destined greatness than a superhero? Superhero fantasies are irreducibly grandiose and unrealistic, but all the more beautiful and brave and compelling for it.

You know, like teens.

At 52, I’m a middle-aged Gen Xer. I’ve got two artificial hips and I just scheduled a double cataract surgery. My hairline is receding. I’m an alta kaker. But I wasn’t always: I was a bright and promising kid, usually the youngest person in the room where we were planning big protests, ambitious digital art projects, or the future of science fiction. I had amazing friends: creative and funny and sweet, loyal and talented and just fun.

We’re mostly doing okay (the ones that lived; fuck cancer and fuck heroin and fuck fentanyl). Some of us are doing pretty good. On a good day, I think I’m doing pretty good. I had a night in 2018 where I got to hang out, as a peer, with my favorite musician and my favorite novelist, both in the same evening. These were artists I’d all but worshipped as a teen. I remember looking at the two selfies I took than night and thinking, Man, if 15 year old me could see these, he’d say that it all worked out.

But you don’t get to be 52 without having a long list of regrets and failures that your stupid brain is only too eager to show you a highlight reel from. No one gets to middle age without a haunting loss that is always trying to push its way to the fore in order to incinerate every triumph great and small and leave ashes behind.

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This day in history

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On July 14, I’m giving the closing keynote for the fifteenth HACKERS ON PLANET EARTH, in QUEENS, NY. Happy Bastille Day! On July 20, I’m appearing in CHICAGO at Exile in Bookville.

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#20yrsgo Flickr adds Creative Commons licenses https://web.archive.org/web/20091226143532/http://blog.flickr.net/en/2004/06/29/creative-commons/

#20yrsago Down and Out in the Magic Kingdom wins Locus Award https://memex.craphound.com/2004/06/29/down-and-out-wins-locus-award/

#20yrsago Fast Company’s new linking policy still broken https://memex.craphound.com/2004/06/29/fast-companys-new-linking-policy-still-broken/

#20yrsago Bayesian spam rumination: when word-frequency-histograms attack! https://freedom-to-tinker.com/2004/06/29/victims-spam-filtering/

#15yrsago Pirate Bay to sell to private company, go legit (?) (!) https://techcrunch.com/2009/06/30/swedish-software-firm-acquires-the-pirate-bay-for-77-million/

#15yrsago Gold farming, real money trades banned in China https://web.archive.org/web/20090706063914/http://www.informationweek.com/news/internet/ebusiness/showArticle.jhtml?articleID=218101859

#15yrsago 13 year old kid reviews a 30 year old Sony Walkman https://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/8117619.stm

#15yrsago Little Brother wins the Campbell Award — see you in Lawrence, KS https://web.archive.org/web/20090703190435/https://www.news.ku.edu/2009/june/29/sciencefiction.shtml

#10yrsago Internet’s Own Boy, free CC-licensed download on Internet Archive https://archive.org/details/TheInternetsOwnBoyTheStoryOfAaronSwartz

#10yrsago Black ASU prof beaten by campus cops without provocation, charged with assault https://newsone.com/3028140/ersula-ore-arizona-state-university/

#10yrsago Stupid Congress: 20 years of GOP war on congressional competence https://washingtonmonthly.com/2014/06/09/the-big-lobotomy/

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Support me this summer on the Clarion Write-A-Thon and help raise money for the Clarion Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers’ Workshop!

Kitchensink callithump linkdump

A mix of unsorted sediments, labeled 'Tholeiitic basalt dike & peperite & basaltic lapillistone in the Precambrian of Ontario, Canada.'   Image: James St John https://flickr.com/photos/47445767@N05/40894047123  CC BY 2.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/deed.enALT

On July 14, I’m giving the closing keynote for the fifteenth HACKERS ON PLANET EARTH, in QUEENS, NY. Happy Bastille Day! On July 20, I’m appearing in CHICAGO at Exile in Bookville.

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With just days to go before my summer vacation, I find myself once again with a backlog of links that I didn’t squeeze into the blog, and no hope of clearing them before I disappear into a hammock for two weeks, so it’s time for my 21st linkdump – here’s the other 20:

https://pluralistic.net/tag/linkdump/

I’m going to start off this week’s ‘dump with a little bragging, because it’s my newsletter, after all. First up: a book! Yes, I write a lot of books, but what I’m talking about here is a physical book, a limited edition of ten, that I commissioned from three brilliant craftspeople.

Back in March 2023, I launched a Kickstarter to pre-sell the audiobook of Red Team Blues, the first novel in my new Martin Hench series, about a forensic accountant who specializes in unwinding tech bros’ finance frauds:

https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250865847/red-team-blues

One of the rewards for that campaign was a very special hardcover: a handmade, leather-bound edition of Red Team Blues, typeset by the typography legend John D. Berry:

https://johndberry.com/

Bound by the legendary book-artist John DeMerritt:

https://www.demerrittstudios.com/

And printed by the master printer JaVae Berry:

https://www.jgraphicssf.com/

But this wasn’t a merely beautiful, well made book – it had a gimmick. You see, I had already completed the first draft of The Bezzle, the second Hench novel, by the time I launched the Kickstarter for Red Team Blues. I had John Berry lay out a tiny edition of that early draft as a quarter-sized book, and then John DeMerritt hand-bound it in card.

The reason that edition of The Bezzle had to be so small was that it was designed to slip into a hollow cavity in the hardcover, a cavity that John Berry had designed the type around, so that both books could be read and enjoyed.

I offered three of these for sale through the Kickstarter, and the three backers were very patient as the team went back and forth on the book, getting everything perfect. Last month, I took delivery of the books: three for my backers, one each for John DeMerritt and John Berry’s personal archives, one for me, and a few more that I’m going to surprise some very special people with this Christmas.

Look, I had high hopes for this book. I dote on beautiful books, my house is busting with them, and I used to work at a new/used science fiction store where we had a small but heartstoppingly great rare book selection. But these books are fucking astounding. Every time I handle mine, my heart races. These are beautiful things, and I just want to show them to everyone:

https://www.flickr.com/photos/doctorow/albums/72177720318331731/

As it happens, the next thing I’m going to do (after I finish this newsletter) is turn in the copyedited manuscript for the third Hench novel, Picks and Shovels, which comes out in Feb 2025 (luckily, I had enough time to review the edits myself, then turn it over to my mom, who has proofed every book I’ve written and always catches typos that everyone else misses, including some real howlers – thanks Mom!):

https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250865908/picksandshovels

Of course, the majority of people who enjoy my books do not end up with one of these beautiful hardcovers – indeed, many of you consume my work exclusively as electronic media: ebooks and (of course) audiobooks. I love audiobooks and the audio editions of my books are very good, with narrators like Amber Benson, Wil Wheaton, and Neil Gaiman.

But here’s the thing: Audible refuses to carry my books, because they are DRM-free (which means that they aren’t locked to Audible’s approved players – you can play my audiobooks with any audiobook player). Audible has a no-exceptions, iron-clad rule that every book they sell must be permanently locked into their platform, which means that Audible customers can’t ditch their Audible software without losing their libraries – all the books they purchased:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/07/25/can-you-hear-me-now/#acx-ripoff

Being excluded from Audible takes a huge bite out of my income – after all, they’re a monopolist with a 90% market share. That’s why I’m so grateful for indie audiobook stores that carry my books on equitable terms that Audible denies – stores like Libro.fm, Downpour and even Google Books.

This week, I discovered a new, amazing indie audiobook store called Storyfair, where the books are DRM-free and the authors get a 75% royalty on every sale:

https://storyfair.net/helpstoryfairgrow/

Storyfair is a labor of love created by a married couple who were sickened and furious by the way that Audible screws authors and listeners and decided to do something about it. Naturally, I uploaded my whole catalog to the site so they could sell it:

https://storyfair.net/search-for-audiobooks/?keyword=cory+doctorow&filter=any

These books are DRM-free, which means that no matter who you buy them from, you can play them in the same player as your other DRM-free audiobooks. You know how you can read all your books under the same lamp, sitting in the same chair, and then put them in the same bookcase when you’re done with them? It’s weird – outrageous even! – that tech companies think that buying a book from them means that they should have the legal right to force you to read or listen to it using their technology exclusively.

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This day in history

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On July 14, I’m giving the closing keynote for the fifteenth HACKERS ON PLANET EARTH, in QUEENS, NY. Happy Bastille Day! On July 20, I’m appearing in CHICAGO at Exile in Bookville.

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#20yrsago BBC affirms Creative Archive in Charter Renewal plans https://web.archive.org/web/20050308195821/https://www.bbc.co.uk/thefuture/pdfs/bbc_bpv.pdf #20yrsago How Free Software won the hearts of hackers, capitalists, commies and academics https://web.archive.org/web/20040701094054/http://www.media-culture.org.au/0406/02_Coleman-Hill.html

#20yrsago Toaster oven casemod https://web.archive.org/web/20040701051006/https://www.snapstream.com/Community/Articles/tvtoaster/

#15yrsago Automated shakedown racket sends legal threats, demands cash https://torrentfreak.com/automated-legal-threats-turn-piracy-into-profit-090628/,/a>

#15yrsago Honduran coup is the first successful military coup d’etat in the region since the Cold War ended https://www.reuters.com/article/topNews/idUSTRE55R24E20090628/

#10yrsago Aaron Swartz documentary, The Internet’s Own Boy, out today https://web.archive.org/web/20140628031422/http://www.takepart.com/internets-own-boy

#10yrsago Horror movies and the Haunted Mansion https://longforgottenhauntedmansion.blogspot.com/2014/06/creepy-old-flicks-part-three-uninvited.html

#5yrsago Felony Contempt of Business Model: Lexmark’s anti-competitive legacy https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2019/06/felony-contempt-business-model-lexmarks-anti-competitive-legacy

#5yrsago Three Halflings in a Trenchcoat: a homebrew fighter class for D&D https://www.reddit.com/r/DnD/comments/c6fdw4/oc_introducing_three_halflings_in_a_trenchcoat_a/

#5yrsago Microsoft is about to shut off its ebook DRM servers: “The books will stop working” https://memex.craphound.com/2019/06/28/microsoft-is-about-to-shut-off-its-ebook-drm-servers-the-books-will-stop-working/

#5yrsago Improving Q&As with peer-review https://memex.craphound.com/2019/06/28/improving-qas-with-peer-review/

#5yrsago Howto: stay civil while discussing the children in America’s concentration camps https://www.theonion.com/tips-for-staying-civil-while-debating-child-prisons-1827147411

#5yrsago Rage Inside the Machine: an insightful, brilliant critique of AI’s computer science, sociology, philosophy and economics https://memex.craphound.com/2019/06/28/rage-inside-the-machine-an-insightful-brilliant-critique-of-ais-computer-science-sociology-philosophy-and-economics-2/

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The reason you can’t buy a car is the same reason that your health insurer let hackers dox you

A Depression-era photo of a used car lot with three cars for sale. It has been hand-tinted. The sky has been replaced with a 'code waterfall' effect as seen in the credit sequences of the Wachowskis' 'Matrix' movies. All of the car headlights have been replaced with the hostile red eye of 'HAL 9000' in Kubrick's '2001: A Space Odyssey.'   Image: Cryteria (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:HAL9000.svg  CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.enALT

On July 14, I’m giving the closing keynote for the fifteenth HACKERS ON PLANET EARTH, in QUEENS, NY. Happy Bastille Day! On July 20, I’m appearing in CHICAGO at Exile in Bookville.

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In 2017, Equifax suffered the worst data-breach in world history, leaking the deep, nonconsensual dossiers it had compiled on 148m Americans and 15m Britons, (and 19k Canadians) into the world, to form an immortal, undeletable reservoir of kompromat and premade identity-theft kits:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2017_Equifax_data_breach

Equifax knew the breach was coming. It wasn’t just that their top execs liquidated their stock in Equifax before the announcement of the breach – it was also that they ignored years of increasingly urgent warnings from IT staff about the problems with their server security.

Things didn’t improve after the breach. Indeed, the 2017 Equifax breach was the starting gun for a string of more breaches, because Equifax’s servers didn’t just have one fubared system – it was composed of pure, refined fubar. After one group of hackers breached the main Equifax system, other groups breached other Equifax systems, over and over, and over:

https://finance.yahoo.com/news/equifax-password-username-admin-lawsuit-201118316.html

Doesn’t this remind you of Boeing? It reminds me of Boeing. The spectacular 737 Max failures in 2018 weren’t the end of the scandal. They weren’t even the scandal’s start – they were the tipping point, the moment in which a long history of lethally defective planes “breached” from the world of aviation wonks and into the wider public consciousness:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_accidents_and_incidents_involving_the_Boeing_737

Just like with Equifax, the 737 Max disasters tipped Boeing into a string of increasingly grim catastrophes. Each fresh disaster landed with the grim inevitability of your general contractor texting you that he’s just opened up your ceiling and discovered that all your joists had rotted out – and that he won’t be able to deal with that until he deals with the termites he found last week, and that they’ll have to wait until he gets to the cracks in the foundation slab from the week before, and that those will have to wait until he gets to the asbestos he just discovered in the walls.

Drip, drip, drip, as you realize that the most expensive thing you own – which is also the thing you had hoped to shelter for the rest of your life – isn’t even a teardown, it’s just a pure liability. Even if you razed the structure, you couldn’t start over, because the soil is full of PCBs. It’s not a toxic asset, because it’s not an asset. It’s just toxic.

Equifax isn’t just a company: it’s infrastructure. It started out as an engine for racial, political and sexual discrimination, paying snoops to collect gossip from nosy neighbors, which was assembled into vast warehouses full of binders that told bank officers which loan applicants should be denied for being queer, or leftists, or, you know, Black:

https://jacobin.com/2017/09/equifax-retail-credit-company-discrimination-loans

This witch-hunts-as-a-service morphed into an official part of the economy, the backbone of the credit industry, with a license to secretly destroy your life with haphazardly assembled “facts” about your life that you had the most minimal, grudging right to appeal (or even see). Turns out there are a lot of customers for this kind of service, and the capital markets showered Equifax with the cash needed to buy almost all of its rivals, in mergers that were waved through by a generation of Reaganomics-sedated antitrust regulators.

There’s a direct line from that acquisition spree to the Equifax breach(es). First of all, companies like Equifax were early adopters of technology. They’re a database company, so they were the crash-test dummies for ever generation of database. These bug-riddled, heavily patched systems were overlaid with subsequent layers of new tech, with new defects to be patched and then overlaid with the next generation.

These systems are intrinsically fragile, because things fall apart at the seams, and these systems are all seams. They are tech-debt personified. Now, every kind of enterprise will eventually reach this state if it keeps going long enough, but the early digitizers are the bow-wave of that coming infopocalypse, both because they got there first and because the bottom tiers of their systems are composed of layers of punchcards and COBOL, crumbling under the geological stresses of seventy years of subsequent technology.

The single best account of this phenomenon is the British Library’s postmortem of their ransomware attack, which is also in the running for “best hard-eyed assessment of how fucked things are”:

https://www.bl.uk/home/british-library-cyber-incident-review-8-march-2024.pdf

There’s a reason libraries, cities, insurance companies, and other giant institutions keep getting breached: they started accumulating tech debt before anyone else, so they’ve got more asbestos in the walls, more sagging joists, more foundation cracks and more termites.

That was the starting point for Equifax – a company with a massive tech debt that it would struggle to pay down under the most ideal circumstances.

Then, Equifax deliberately made this situation infinitely worse through a series of mergers in which it bought dozens of other companies that all had their own version of this problem, and duct-taped their failing, fucked up IT systems to its own. The more seams an IT system has, the more brittle and insecure it is. Equifax deliberately added so many seams that you need to be able to visualized additional spatial dimensions to grasp them – they had fractal seams.

But wait, there’s more! The reason to merge with your competitors is to create a monopoly position, and the value of a monopoly position is that it makes a company too big to fail, which makes it too big to jail, which makes it too big to care. Each Equifax acquisition took a piece off the game board, making it that much harder to replace Equifax if it fucked up. That, in turn, made it harder to punish Equifax if it fucked up. And that meant that Equifax didn’t have to care if it fucked up.

Which is why the increasingly desperate pleas for more resources to shore up Equifax’s crumbling IT and security infrastructure went unheeded. Top management could see that they were steaming directly into an iceberg, but they also knew that they had a guaranteed spot on the lifeboats, and that someone else would be responsible for fishing the dead passengers out of the sea. Why turn the wheel?

That’s what happened to Boeing, too: the company acquired new layers of technical complexity by merging with rivals (principally McDonnell-Douglas), and then starved the departments that would have to deal with that complexity because it was being managed by execs whose driving passion was to run a company that was too big to care. Those execs then added more complexity by chasing lower costs by firing unionized, competent, senior staff and replacing them with untrained scabs in jurisdictions chosen for their lax labor and environmental enforcement regimes.

(The biggest difference was that Boeing once had a useful, high-quality product, whereas Equifax started off as an irredeemably terrible, if efficient, discrimination machine, and grew to become an equally terrible, but also ferociously incompetent, enterprise.)

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This day in history

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On July 14, I’m giving the closing keynote for the fifteenth HACKERS ON PLANET EARTH, in QUEENS, NY. Happy Bastille Day! On July 20, I’m appearing in CHICAGO at Exile in Bookville.

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#15yrsago Comics creator stopped by TSA for carrying script about writer under suspicion by TSA https://web.archive.org/web/20090516205904/http://www.sfscope.com/2009/05/comics-artist-mark-sable-detai.html

#10yrsago SWAT teams claim to be private mercenaries, immune to open records laws https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-watch/wp/2014/06/26/massachusetts-swat-teams-claim-theyre-private-corporations-immune-from-open-records-laws/

#10yrsago Poesy guest-reviews the new Ariol book https://memex.craphound.com/2014/06/27/poesy-guest-reviews-the-new-ariol-book/

#5yrsago Internet users are wising up to persuasive “nudge” techniques https://behavioralscientist.org/consumers-are-becoming-wise-to-your-nudge/

#5yrsago Congress orders Ajit Pai: hands off San Francisco’s broadband competition law https://arstechnica.com/tech-policy/2019/06/house-votes-to-block-ajit-pais-plan-to-kill-san-francisco-broadband-law/

#5yrsago NYC Mesh, a neutral, nonprofit meshing ISP, dramatically expands access in Brooklyn https://www.vice.com/en/article/paj8z8/a-diy-internet-network-has-drastically-expanded-its-coverage-in-nyc

#5yrsago Robert Reich backs Elizabeth Warren’s plan to break up Big Tech https://www.alternet.org/2019/06/robert-reich-why-we-need-to-break-up-big-tech

#5yrsago How Memphis’s Methodist University Hospital, a “nonprofit,” sued the shit out of its Black, poor patients while raking in millions and paying execs more than a million each https://www.propublica.org/article/methodist-le-bonheur-healthcare-sues-poor-medical-debt#163801

#5yrsago Hong Kong protesters repeatedly blockade police HQ, demanding release of people arrested at #612strike demonstrations https://www.scmp.com/news/hong-kong/politics/article/3016238/hong-kong-police-under-siege-again-protesters-surround

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Support me this summer on the Clarion Write-A-Thon and help raise money for the Clarion Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers’ Workshop!

Copyright takedowns are a cautionary tale that few are heeding

EFF's banner for the 'Unfiltered' white paper, depicting TV static overlaid with a parody of the Youtube logo and wordmark, but instead of 'Youtube' it reads 'Fair Use,' with glitched vertical and horizontal sync that distorts the logo.   Image: EFF https://www.eff.org/files/banner_library/yt-fu-1b.png  CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.enALT

On July 14, I’m giving the closing keynote for the fifteenth HACKERS ON PLANET EARTH, in QUEENS, NY. Happy Bastille Day! On July 20, I’m appearing in CHICAGO at Exile in Bookville.

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We’re living through one of those moments when millions of people become suddenly and overwhelmingly interested in fair use, one of the subtlest and worst-understood aspects of copyright law. It’s not a subject you can master by skimming a Wikipedia article!

I’ve been talking about fair use with laypeople for more than 20 years. I’ve met so many people who possess the unshakable, serene confidence of the truly wrong, like the people who think fair use means you can take x words from a book, or y seconds from a song and it will always be fair, while anything more will never be.

Or the people who think that if you violate any of the four factors, your use can’t be fair – or the people who think that if you fail all of the four factors, you must be infringing (people, the Supreme Court is calling and they want to tell you about the Betamax!).

You might think that you can never quote a song lyric in a book without infringing copyright, or that you must clear every musical sample. You might be rock solid certain that scraping the web to train an AI is infringing. If you hold those beliefs, you do not understand the “fact intensive” nature of fair use.

But you can learn! It’s actually a really cool and interesting and gnarly subject, and it’s a favorite of copyright scholars, who have really fascinating disagreements and discussions about the subject. These discussions often key off of the controversies of the moment, but inevitably they implicate earlier fights about everything from the piano roll to 2 Live Crew to antiracist retellings of Gone With the Wind.

One of the most interesting discussions of fair use you can ask for took place in 2019, when the NYU Engelberg Center on Innovation Law & Policy held a symposium called “Proving IP.” One of the panels featured dueling musicologists debating the merits of the Blurred Lines case. That case marked a turning point in music copyright, with the Marvin Gaye estate successfully suing Robin Thicke and Pharrell Williams for copying the “vibe” of Gaye’s “Got to Give it Up.”

Naturally, this discussion featured clips from both songs as the experts – joined by some of America’s top copyright scholars – delved into the legal reasoning and future consequences of the case. It would be literally impossible to discuss this case without those clips.

And that’s where the problems start: as soon as the symposium was uploaded to Youtube, it was flagged and removed by Content ID, Google’s $100,000,000 copyright enforcement system. This initial takedown was fully automated, which is how Content ID works: rightsholders upload audio to claim it, and then Content ID removes other videos where that audio appears (rightsholders can also specify that videos with matching clips be demonetized, or that the ad revenue from those videos be diverted to the rightsholders).

But Content ID has a safety valve: an uploader whose video has been incorrectly flagged can challenge the takedown. The case is then punted to the rightsholder, who has to manually renew or drop their claim. In the case of this symposium, the rightsholder was Universal Music Group, the largest record company in the world. UMG’s personnel reviewed the video and did not drop the claim.

99.99% of the time, that’s where the story would end, for many reasons. First of all, most people don’t understand fair use well enough to contest the judgment of a cosmically vast, unimaginably rich monopolist who wants to censor their video. Just as importantly, though, is that Content ID is a Byzantine system that is nearly as complex as fair use, but it’s an entirely private affair, created and adjudicated by another galactic-scale monopolist (Google).

Google’s copyright enforcement system is a cod-legal regime with all the downsides of the law, and a few wrinkles of its own (for example, it’s a system without lawyers – just corporate experts doing battle with laypeople). And a single mis-step can result in your video being deleted or your account being permanently deleted, along with every video you’ve ever posted. For people who make their living on audiovisual content, losing your Youtube account is an extinction-level event:

https://www.eff.org/wp/unfiltered-how-youtubes-content-id-discourages-fair-use-and-dictates-what-we-see-online

So for the average Youtuber, Content ID is a kind of Kafka-as-a-Service system that is always avoided and never investigated. But the Engelbert Center isn’t your average Youtuber: they boast some of the country’s top copyright experts, specializing in exactly the questions Youtube’s Content ID is supposed to be adjudicating.

So naturally, they challenged the takedown – only to have UMG double down. This is par for the course with UMG: they are infamous for refusing to consider fair use in takedown requests. Their stance is so unreasonable that a court actually found them guilty of violating the DMCA’s provision against fraudulent takedowns:

https://www.eff.org/cases/lenz-v-universal

But the DMCA’s takedown system is part of the real law, while Content ID is a fake law, created and overseen by a tech monopolist, not a court. So the fate of the Blurred Lines discussion turned on the Engelberg Center’s ability to navigate both the law and the n-dimensional topology of Content ID’s takedown flowchart.

It took more than a year, but eventually, Engelberg prevailed.

Until they didn’t.

If Content ID was a person, it would be baby, specifically, a baby under 18 months old – that is, before the development of “object permanence.” Until our 18th month (or so), we lack the ability to reason about things we can’t see – this the period when small babies find peek-a-boo amazing. Object permanence is the ability to understand things that aren’t in your immediate field of vision.

Content ID has no object permanence. Despite the fact that the Engelberg Blurred Lines panel was the most involved fair use question the system was ever called upon to parse, it managed to repeatedly forget that it had decided that the panel could stay up. Over and over since that initial determination, Content ID has taken down the video of the panel, forcing Engelberg to go through the whole process again.

But that’s just for starters, because Youtube isn’t the only place where a copyright enforcement bot is making billions of unsupervised, unaccountable decisions about what audiovisual material you’re allowed to access.

Spotify is yet another monopolist, with a justifiable reputation for being extremely hostile to artists’ interests, thanks in large part to the role that UMG and the other major record labels played in designing its business rules:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/09/12/streaming-doesnt-pay/#stunt-publishing

Spotify has spent hundreds of millions of dollars trying to capture the podcasting market, in the hopes of converting one of the last truly open digital publishing systems into a product under its control:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/01/27/enshittification-resistance/#ummauerter-garten-nein

Thankfully, that campaign has failed – but millions of people have (unwisely) ditched their open podcatchers in favor of Spotify’s pre-enshittified app, so everyone with a podcast now must target Spotify for distribution if they hope to reach those captive users.

Guess who has a podcast? The Engelberg Center.

Naturally, Engelberg’s podcast includes the audio of that Blurred Lines panel, and that audio includes samples from both “Blurred Lines” and “Got To Give It Up.”

So – naturally – UMG keeps taking down the podcast.

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This day in history

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On July 14, I’m giving the closing keynote for the fifteenth HACKERS ON PLANET EARTH, in QUEENS, NY. Happy Bastille Day! On July 20, I’m appearing in CHICAGO at Exile in Bookville.

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#15yrsago Myths about Canadian healthcare https://www.denverpost.com/2009/06/04/debunking-canadian-health-care-myths/

#15yrsago Abstinence doesn’t work for IT or for teens https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2009/jun/16/computer-security-abstinence

#15yrsago Scam artists con Apple into killing app that tells you when the bus is due in San Francisco https://web.archive.org/web/20090627161346/http://sfappeal.com/news/2009/06/who-owns-sfmta-arrival-data.php

#10yrsago US inches towards decriminalizing phone unlocking https://www.techdirt.com/2014/06/25/year-half-later-unlocking-your-phone-one-step-closer-to-being-legal/

#10yrsago North Korea threatens “merciless” war against the US over Seth Rogen movie https://www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-28014069

#10yrsago Copyfraud, uncertainty and doubt: the vanishing online public domain https://medium.com/@xor/houston-we-have-a-public-domain-problem-bd971c57dfdc

#10yrsago Charlie Stross on the stop/go nature of technological change https://www.antipope.org/charlie/blog-static/2014/06/yapcna-2014-keynote-programmin.html

#10yrsago Lurking inside Obama’s secret drone law: another secret drone law https://www.techdirt.com/2014/06/25/enough-secret-law-newly-released-doj-drone-killing-justification-memo-points-to-another-secret-drone-memo/

#10yrsago Kleargear must pay $306,750 for trashing a complaining customer’s credit https://arstechnica.com/tech-policy/2014/06/kleargear-must-pay-306750-to-couple-that-left-negative-review/

#5yrsago Podcast number 300: “Adversarial Interoperability: Reviving an Elegant Weapon From a More Civilized Age to Slay Today’s Monopolies” https://ia903004.us.archive.org/11/items/Cory_Doctorow_Podcast_300/Cory_Doctorow_Podcast_300_-_Adversarial_Interoperability.mp3

#5yrsago How China ingests and adapts western culture https://aeon.co/essays/how-china-remakes-its-cultural-imports-from-the-west

#5yrsago Prosecutors and federal judges collaborate with corporations to seal evidence of public safety risks, sentencing hundreds of thousands of Americans to death https://www.reuters.com/investigates/special-report/usa-courts-secrecy-judges/

#5yrsago EU expert panel calls for a ban on AI-based risk-scoring and limits on mass surveillance https://www.theverge.com/2019/6/26/18759447/eu-ai-ethical-policy-recommendations-ban-mass-scoring-surveillance

#5yrsago You treasure what you measure: how KPIs make software dystopias https://web.archive.org/web/20190622092434/https://datascience.columbia.edu/ethical-principles-okrs-and-kpis-what-youtube-and-facebook-could-learn-tukey#.XRMxf5DB5eg.twitter

#5yrsato Dieselgate 2.0: 42,000 Mercedes diesels recalled for “illegal software” https://arstechnica.com/cars/2019/06/german-regulator-says-it-discovered-new-illegal-software-on-daimler-diesels/

#5yrsago Insulin: why the price of a 100-year-old drug has tripled in a decade https://prospect.org/health/insulin-racket/

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Cleantech has an enshittification problem

A firebombed cityscape under a smoky red sky. In the foreground is a gigantic brick, most of the length of a city block, with a set of solar panels atop it.  Image: 臺灣古寫真上色 (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Raid_on_Kagi_City_1945.jpg  Grendelkhan (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Ground_mounted_solar_panels.gk.jpg  CC BY-SA 4.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/deed.enALT

On July 14, I’m giving the closing keynote for the fifteenth HACKERS ON PLANET EARTH, in QUEENS, NY. Happy Bastille Day! On July 20, I’m appearing in CHICAGO at Exile in Bookville.

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EVs won’t save the planet. Ultimately, the material bill for billions of individual vehicles and the unavoidable geometry of more cars-more traffic-more roads-greater distances-more cars dictate that the future of our cities and planet requires public transit – lots of it.

But no matter how much public transit we install, there’s always going to be some personal vehicles on the road, and not just bikes, ebikes and scooters. Between deliveries, accessibility, and stubbornly low-density regions, there’s going to be a lot of cars, vans and trucks on the road for the foreseeable future, and these should be electric.

Beyond that irreducible minimum of personal vehicles, there’s the fact that individuals can’t install their own public transit system; in places that lack the political will or means to create working transit, EVs are a way for people to significantly reduce their personal emissions.

In policy circles, EV adoption is treated as a logistical and financial issue, so governments have focused on making EVs affordable and increasing the density of charging stations. As an EV owner, I can affirm that affordability and logistics were important concerns when we were shopping for a car.

But there’s a third EV problem that is almost entirely off policy radar: enshittification.

An EV is a rolling computer in a fancy case with a squishy person inside of it. While this can sound scary, there are lots of cool implications for this. For example, your EV could download your local power company’s tariff schedule and preferentially charge itself when the rates are lowest; they could also coordinate with the utility to reduce charging when loads are peaking. You can start them with your phone. Your repair technician can run extensive remote diagnostics on them and help you solve many problems from the road. New features can be delivered over the air.

That’s just for starters, but there’s so much more in the future. After all, the signal virtue of a digital computer is its flexibility. The only computer we know how to make is the Turing complete, universal, Von Neumann machine, which can run every valid program. If a feature is computationally tractable – from automated parallel parking to advanced collision prevention – it can run on a car.

The problem is that this digital flexibility presents a moral hazard to EV manufacturers. EVs are designed to make any kind of unauthorized, owner-selected modification into an IP rights violation (“IP” in this case is “any law that lets me control the conduct of my customers or competitors”):

https://locusmag.com/2020/09/cory-doctorow-ip/

EVs are also designed so that the manufacturer can unilaterally exert control over them or alter their operation. EVs – even more than conventional vehicles – are designed to be remotely killswitched in order to help manufacturers and dealers pressure people into paying their car notes on time:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/07/24/rent-to-pwn/#kitt-is-a-demon

Manufacturers can reach into your car and change how much of your battery you can access:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/07/28/edison-not-tesla/#demon-haunted-world

They can lock your car and have it send its location to a repo man, then greet him by blinking its lights, honking its horn, and pulling out of its parking space:

https://tiremeetsroad.com/2021/03/18/tesla-allegedly-remotely-unlocks-model-3-owners-car-uses-smart-summon-to-help-repo-agent/

And of course, they can detect when you’ve asked independent mechanic to service your car and then punish you by degrading its functionality:

https://www.repairerdrivennews.com/2024/06/26/two-of-eight-claims-in-tesla-anti-trust-lawsuit-will-move-forward/

This is “twiddling” – unilaterally and irreversibly altering the functionality of a product or service, secure in the knowledge that IP law will prevent anyone from twiddling back by restoring the gadget to a preferred configuration:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/02/19/twiddler/

The thing is, for an EV, twiddling is the best case scenario. As bad as it is for the company that made your EV to change how it works whenever they feel like picking your pocket, that’s infinitely preferable to the manufacturer going bankrupt and bricking your car.

That’s what just happened to owners of Fisker EVs, cars that cost $40-70k. Cars are long-term purchases. An EV should last 12-20 years, or even longer if you pay to swap the battery pack. Fisker was founded in 2016 and shipped its first Ocean SUV in 2023. The company is now bankrupt:

https://insideevs.com/news/723669/fisker-inc-bankruptcy-chapter-11-official/

Fisker called its vehicles “software-based cars” and they weren’t kidding. Without continuous software updates and server access, those Fisker Ocean SUVs are turning into bricks. What’s more, the company designed the car from the ground up to make any kind of independent service and support into a felony, by wrapping the whole thing in overlapping layers of IP. That means that no one can step in with a module that jailbreaks the Fisker and drops in an alternative firmware that will keep the fleet rolling.

This is the third EV risk – not just finance, not just charger infrastructure, but the possibility that any whizzy, cool new EV company will go bust and brick your $70k cleantech investment, irreversibly transforming your car into 5,500 lb worth of e-waste.

This confers a huge advantage onto the big automakers like VW, Kia, Ford, etc. Tesla gets a pass, too, because it achieved critical mass before people started to wise up to the risk of twiddling and bricking. If you’re making a serious investment in a product you expect to use for 20 years, are you really gonna buy it from a two-year old startup with six months’ capital in the bank?

The incumbency advantage here means that the big automakers won’t have any reason to sink a lot of money into R&D, because they won’t have to worry about hungry startups with cool new ideas eating their lunches. They can maintain the cozy cartel that has seen cars stagnate for decades, with the majority of “innovation” taking the form of shitty, extractive and ill-starred ideas like touchscreen controls and an accelerator pedal that you have to rent by the month:

https://www.theverge.com/2022/11/23/23474969/mercedes-car-subscription-faster-acceleration-feature-price

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This day in history

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On July 14, I’m giving the closing keynote for the fifteenth HACKERS ON PLANET EARTH, in QUEENS, NY. Happy Bastille Day! On July 20, I’m appearing in CHICAGO at Exile in Bookville.

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#20yrsago FastCompany’s terrible linking policy https://memex.craphound.com/2004/06/25/fastcompanys-terrible-linking-policy/

#15yrsago Magic Mirror of the Mermaid Queen, sequel to CHANGELING, a modern folktale of New York https://memex.craphound.com/2009/06/25/magic-mirror-of-the-mermaid-queen-sequel-to-changeling-a-modern-folktale-of-new-york/

#15yrsago Illegal e-waste dumped in Ghana includes unencrypted hard drives full of US security secrets https://web.archive.org/web/20090628071458/https://www.itworld.com/security/69758/reporters-find-northrop-grumman-data-ghana-market

#10yrsago Once there was a show called ���The Hat Squad” and it was very, very stupid https://memex.craphound.com/2014/06/25/once-there-was-a-show-called-the-hat-squad-and-it-was-very-very-stupid/

#10yrsago UK secretary of state: “There is no surveillance state” https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-politics-28006739

#10yrsago Cops bust cybercrook who sent heroin to Brian Krebs https://krebsonsecurity.com/2014/06/the-fly-has-been-swatted/

#10yrsago SF city attorney demands shutdown of parking-space-auctioning app https://web.archive.org/web/20140625033523/http://blog.sfgate.com/cityinsider/2014/06/23/sf-cracks-down-on-street-parking-cash-apps/

#5yrsago An 14-year-old’s Internet-of-Things worm is bricking shitty devices by the thousands https://www.zdnet.com/article/new-silex-malware-is-bricking-iot-devices-has-scary-plans/

#5yrsago How Metabrainz stood up to a predatory copyright lawsuit and won https://blog.metabrainz.org/2019/06/25/we-were-sued-by-a-copyright-troll-and-we-prevailed/

#5yrsago “Massive scale” intrusion into mobile carriers’ networks exposed customers’ location, call data for years https://www.cybereason.com/blog/research/operation-soft-cell-a-worldwide-campaign-against-telecommunications-providers

#5yrsago Independent evaluation of “aggression detection” microphones used in schools and hospitals finds them to be worse than useless https://features.propublica.org/aggression-detector/the-unproven-invasive-surveillance-technology-schools-are-using-to-monitor-students/

#5yrsago Microsoft employees want to starve its PAC, which keeps giving money to homophobic, racist, climate-denying Republicans https://onezero.medium.com/a-group-of-microsoft-employees-is-fighting-the-companys-political-action-committee-7dae732290e3

#5yrsago Cult of the Dead Cow: the untold story of the hacktivist group that presaged everything great and terrible about the internet https://memex.craphound.com/2019/06/25/cult-of-the-dead-cow-the-untold-story-of-the-hacktivist-group-that-presaged-everything-great-and-terrible-about-the-internet/

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Mirion Malle’s “So Long Sad Love”

The Drawn and Quarterly cover of 'So Long Sad Love.'ALT

On July 14, I’m giving the closing keynote for the fifteenth HACKERS ON PLANET EARTH, in QUEENS, NY. Happy Bastille Day! On July 20, I’m appearing in CHICAGO at Exile in Bookville.

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In Mirion Malle’s So Long Sad Love, a graphic novel from Drawn and Quarterly, we get an all-too-real mystery story: when do you trust the whisper network that carries the fragmentary, elliptical word of shitty men?

https://drawnandquarterly.com/books/so-long-sad-love/

Cleo is a French comics creator who’s moved to Montreal, in part to be with Charles, a Quebecois creator who helps her find a place in the city’s tight-knit artistic scene. The relationship feels like a good one, with the normal ups and downs, but then Cleo travels to a festival, where she meets Farah, a vivacious and talented fellow artist. They’re getting along great…until Farah discovers who Cleo’s boyfriend is. Though Farah doesn’t say anything, she is visibly flustered and makes her excuses before hurriedly departing.

This kicks off Cleo’s hunt for the truth about her boyfriend, a hunt that is complicated by the fact that she’s so far from home, that her friends are largely his friends, that he flies off the handle every time she raises the matter, and by her love for him.

There’s a term for men like Charles: a “missing stair.” “Missing stair” is a metaphor for someone in a social circle who presents some kind of persistent risk to the people around them, who is accommodated rather than confronted:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Missing_stair

The metaphor goes like this: you’re at a party and every time someone asks where the bathroom is, another partygoer directs them to the upper floor and warns them that one of the stairs is missing, and if they don’t avoid that tread, they will fall through and be gravely injured. In this metaphor, a whole community of people have tacitly decided to simply accept the risk that someone who is forgetful or new to the scene will fall through the stair – no one has come forward to just fix that stair.

The origins of this term are in BDSM circles, and the canonical “missing stair” is a sexual predator, but from the outset, it’s referred to all kinds of people with failings that present some source of frustration or unhappiness to those around them, from shouters to bigots to just someone who won’t help do the dishes after a dinner party:

https://pervocracy.blogspot.com/2012/06/missing-stair.html

We all know a few missing stairs, and anyone who’s got even a little self-reflexivity must wonder from time to time if they’re not also a missing stair, at least to some people in their lives. After all, friendship always entails some accommodation, and doubly so love – as Dan Savage is fond of saying, “There is no person who is ‘The One’ for you – the best you can hope for is the '0.6’ that you can round up to 'The One,’ with a lot of work.”

And at least some missing stairs aren’t born – they’re made. Everyone screws up, everyone’s got some bad habits, everyone’s got some blind spots about what others expect of them and how others perceive us. When the people around us make bad calls about whether to let us skate on our faults and when to confront us, those faults fester and multiply and calcify. This is compounded in long-tenured relationships that begin in our youth, when we are still figuring out our boundaries – the people who we give a pass to when we’re young and naive can become a fixture in our lives despite characteristics that, as adults, we wouldn’t tolerate in someone who is new to our social scene.

To make all this even more complicated, there’s the role that power plays in all this. Many missing stairs are keenly attuned to power dynamics and present a different face to people who have some authority – whether formal or tacit – to sanction them. This is why so many of the outings of #MeToo predators provoked mystified men to say, “Gosh, they never acted that way around me – I had no idea.”

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This day in history

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On July 14, I’m giving the closing keynote for the fifteenth HACKERS ON PLANET EARTH, in QUEENS, NY. Happy Bastille Day! On July 20, I’m appearing in CHICAGO at Exile in Bookville.

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#20yrsago ESC-key creator dies https://www.nytimes.com/2004/06/25/us/robert-w-bemer-84-pioneer-in-computer-programming.html

#20yrsago Orrin Hatch criminalizes the iPod https://web.archive.org/web/20040627001053/https://www.eff.org/IP/Apple_Complaint.php

#20yrsago Schneier: More police power = less security https://www.schneier.com/essays/archives/2004/06/unchecked_police_and.html

#20yrsago Ernest Miller savages Orrin Hatch’s grotesque new law https://corante.com/importance/the-obsessively-annotated-introduction-to-the-induce-act/

#20yrsago MP candidates on the “Canadian DMCA” https://web.archive.org/web/20040812131225/https://ddll.sdf1.net/archives/002667.html

#15yrsago How the Canadian copyright lobby uses fakes, fronts, and circular references to subvert the debate on copyright https://www.michaelgeist.ca/2009/06/copyright-policy-laundering/

#15yrsago Julian Comstock: Robert Charles Wilson’s masterful novel of a post-collapse feudal America: “If Jules Verne had read Karl Marx, then sat down to write The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire“ https://memex.craphound.com/2009/06/24/julian-comstock-robert-charles-wilsons-masterful-novel-of-a-post-collapse-feudal-america-if-jules-verne-had-read-karl-marx-then-sat-down-to-write-the-decline-and-fall-of-the-roman-empire/

#15yrsago Health insurance versus health https://web.archive.org/web/20090709060418/http://voices.washingtonpost.com/ezra-klein/2009/06/the_truth_about_the_insurance.html

#15yrsago Guards are the worst prison-rapists https://web.archive.org/web/20090624183205/http://nprec.us/publication/report/executive_summary.php

#15yrsago Great Firewall of Australia to block video games unsuitable for people under 15 https://www.smh.com.au/technology/web-filters-to-censor-video-games-20090625-cxrx.html

#10yrsago Thomas Piketty’s Capital in the 21st Century https://memex.craphound.com/2014/06/24/thomas-pikettys-capital-in-the-21st-century/

#10yrsago How accounting forced transparency on the aristocracy and changed the world https://www.bostonglobe.com/ideas/2014/06/07/the-vanished-grandeur-accounting/3zcbRBoPDNIryWyNYNMvbO/story.html

#5yrsago America’s super-rich write to Democratic presidential hopefuls, demanding a wealth tax https://medium.com/@letterforawealthtax/an-open-letter-to-the-2020-presidential-candidates-its-time-to-tax-us-more-6eb3a548b2fe

#5yrsago You can’t recycle your way out of climate change https://www.vox.com/the-highlight/2019/5/28/18629833/climate-change-2019-green-new-deal

#5yrsago US election security: still a dumpster fire https://www.wired.com/story/election-security-2020/

#5yrsago “I Shouldn’t Have to Publish This in The New York Times”: my op-ed from the future https://www.nytimes.com/2019/06/24/opinion/future-free-speech-social-media-platforms.html

#5yrsago Bernie Sanders will use a tax on Wall Street speculators to wipe out $1.6 trillion in US student debt https://berniesanders.com/issues/free-college-cancel-debt/

#5yrsago Mandatory childbirth: how the anti-abortion crusade masks cruelty to women in the “sacralizing of fetuses” https://www.nytimes.com/2019/06/23/opinion/anti-abortion-history.html

#5yrsago The internet has become a “low-trust society” https://www.wired.com/story/internet-made-dupes-cynics-of-us-all/

#5yrsago “PM for a day”: dissident Tories plan to bring down the government the day after Boris Johnson becomes Prime Minister https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-politics-48742881

#5yrsago Report: UK “Ransomware consultants” Red Mosquito promise to unlock your data, but they’re just paying off the criminals (and charging you a markup!) https://www.propublica.org/article/sting-catches-another-ransomware-firm-red-mosquito-negotiating-with-hackers

#5yrsago Lessons from Microsoft’s antitrust adventure for today’s Big Tech giants https://web.archive.org/web/20190622131345/https://www.sfgate.com/business/article/Microsoft-s-missteps-offer-antitrust-lessons-for-14030092.php

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Weinersmith and Boulet’s “Bea Wolf”

The Firstsecond cover for 'Bea Wolf.'ALT

On July 14, I’m giving the closing keynote for the fifteenth HACKERS ON PLANET EARTH, in QUEENS, NY. Happy Bastille Day! On July 20, I’m appearing in CHICAGO at Exile in Bookville.

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Bea Wolf is Zach Weinersmith and Boulet’s ferociously amazingly great illustrated kids’ graphic novel adaptation of the Old English epic poem, which inspired Tolkien, who helped bring it to popularity after it had languished in obscurity for centuries:

https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250776297/beawolf

Boy is this a wildly improbable artifact. Weinersmith and Boulet set themselves the task of bringing Germanic heroic saga from more than a thousand years ago to modern children, while preserving the meter and the linguistic and literary tropes of the original. And they did it!

There are some changes, of course. Grendel – the boss monster that both Beowulf and Bea Wulf must defeat – is no longer obsessed with decapitating his foes and stealing their heads. In Bea Wulf, Grendel is a monstrously grown up and boring adult who watches cable news and flosses twice per day, and when he defeats the kids whose destruction he is bent upon, he does so by turning them into boring adults, too.

And Bea Wulf – and the kings that do battle with Grendel – are not interested in the gold and jewels that the kings of Beowulf hoard. In Bea Wulf, the treasure is toys, chocolate, soda, candy, food without fiber, television shows without redeeming educational content, water balloons, nerf swords and spears, and other stuff beloved of kids and hated by parents.

That substitution is key to transposing the thousand-year-old adult epic Beowulf for enjoyment by small children in the 21st century. After all, what makes Beowulf so epic is the sense that it is set in a time in which a primal valor still reigned, but it is narrated for an audience that has been tamed and domesticated. Beowulf makes you long for a never-was time of fierce and unwavering bravery. Bea Wulf beautifully conjures the years of early childhood when you and the kids in your group had your own little sealed-off world, which grownups could barely perceive and never understand.

Growing up, after all, is a process of repeating things that are brave the first time you do them, over and over again, until they become banal. That’s what “coming of age” really boils down to: the slow and relentless transformation of the mythic, the epic, and the unknowable and unknown into the tame, the explained, the mastered. When you’re just mastering balance and coordination, the playground climber is a challenge out of legend. A couple years later, it’s just something you climb.

The correspondences between the leeching away of magic lamented in Beowulf and experienced by all of us as we grow out of childhood are obvious in hindsight and surprising and beautiful and bittersweet when you encounter them in Bea Wolf.

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This day in history

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On July 14, I’m giving the closing keynote for the fifteenth HACKERS ON PLANET EARTH, in QUEENS, NY. Happy Bastille Day! On July 20, I’m appearing in CHICAGO at Exile in Bookville.

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#15yrsago Consumer groups around the world demand transparency on secret copyright treaty https://web.archive.org/web/20090627012359/http://www.ip-watch.org/weblog/2009/06/23/eu-us-consumer-groups-issue-resolution-on-enforcement-demand-role-in-acta/

#10yrsago Podcast: How Amazon is holding Hachette hostage https://ia804509.us.archive.org/35/items/Cory_Doctorow_Podcast_277/Cory_Doctorow_Podcast_277_How_Amazon_is_holding_Hachette_hostage.mp3

#10yrsago Illinois State Cops blew $250K on “terrorist-catching” Stingray surveillance gadgets https://www.muckrock.com/foi/illinois-168/harris-corporation-11372/

#10yrsago 50,000 march against austerity in London, BBC doesn’t notice https://tompride.wordpress.com/2014/06/21/bbc-and-press-ignore-massive-demonstration-against-austerity-in-london/

#5yrsago Texas Instrument’s post-#taxscam budget for financial engineering is $5B — triple its budget for actual engineering https://www.dallasnews.com/opinion/commentary/2019/06/23/thanks-uncle-sam-after-tax-cuts-texas-instruments-spent-5-billion-on-stock-three-times-more-than-rd/

#5yrsago Man-Eaters Volume Two: Fleshing out the world where girls turn into lethal werepanthers when they get their periods https://memex.craphound.com/2019/06/23/man-eaters-volume-two-fleshing-out-the-world-where-girls-turn-into-lethal-werepanthers-when-they-get-their-periods/

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Support me this summer on the Clarion Write-A-Thon and help raise money for the Clarion Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers’ Workshop!

This day in history

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TONIGHT (June 22) I’ll be in OAKLAND, CA for a panel (13hPT) and a keynote (18hPT) at the LOCUS AWARDS.

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#15yrsago Asking sf writers to imagine terrorist scenarios is stupid https://www.wired.com/2009/06/how-science-fiction-writers-can-help-or-hurt-homeland-security/

#15yrsago Lancaster, PA: the most spied-upon town in America https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-2009-jun-21-na-spycam-city21-story.html

#15yrsago US Department of Defense classes protests as “low-level terrorism” https://web.archive.org/web/20090616112119/http://open.salon.com/blog/dennis_loo/2009/06/14/dod_training_manual_protests_are_low-level_terrorism

#15yrsago Nokia and Siemens provided surveillance tools used to bust Iranian activists https://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2009/apr/13/europe39s-telecoms-aid-with-spy-tech/

#15yrsago AOL CDs make great shims for home carpentry projects https://web.archive.org/web/20090625023007/http://antfarmjournal.com/AF-Journal/AOLshim9-21-9/index.html

#15yrsago Some Kindle books have secret caps on the number of times you can download them https://memex.craphound.com/2009/06/22/some-kindle-books-have-secret-caps-on-the-number-of-times-you-can-download-them/

#15yrsago Germany gets its first Pirate Party lawmaker https://www.thelocal.de/politics/20090621-20093.html

#10yrsago CS Lewis explains why you should be proud to read children’s books https://www.catholicculture.org/culture/library/view.cfm?recnum=9117

#10yrsago Watch a Texas lawman’s pathetic scramble for a reason not to record him https://www.techdirt.com/2014/06/20/texas-deputy-displays-ignorance-laws-hes-enforcing-while-trying-to-shut-down-citizens-recording/

#5yrsago In a bid to avoid climate vote, Oregon Republican Senators cross state lines, go into hiding, threaten to murder cops, as white nationalist paramilitaries pledge armed support https://www.vox.com/2019/6/21/18700741/oregon-republican-walkout-climate-change-bill

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Support me this summer on the Clarion Write-A-Thon and help raise money for the Clarion Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers’ Workshop!