EXCLUSIVEEtiquette expert weighs in on whether it is EVER acceptable to ask someone to do something for free at your wedding
- Myka Meier weighed in on if it's appropriate to ask for freebies for your big day
- She warned bride-and-grooms-to-be it's something they should never do
- READ MORE: Violinist calls out childhood bully who asked her to play for FREE
Love is patient, love is kind - but if you expect people to do something for free on your big day, you're out of your mind.
A woman recently sparked outrage after she reached out to an old classmate from high school - whom she also bullied - asking her to perform for free at her upcoming wedding.
According to an etiquette expert Myka Meier, it's never appropriate to reach out for a complimentary products and services for a big event - but there are ways to broach the idea.
Myka, New York Plaza Hotel's etiquette instructor and the founder of Beaumont Etiquette, told the DailyMail.com if someone wants to gift you a product or service for you big day, they will volunteer their time or recourses - don't ask them.
According to an etiquette expert Myka Meier, it's never appropriate to reach out for a complimentary products and services for a big event - but there are ways to navigate the idea
'It is not appropriate to ask friends or acquaintances for free services or products for your wedding for many reasons,' she cautioned.
'If someone truly wants to donate their service or time, they will usually offer it voluntarily.'
Myka says the proper etiquette is to let them come to you to - but shared there is a way to softly approach the topic.
'Instead of asking directly, you can share your plans and excitement about the wedding. If someone wants to offer their help, they will likely do so,' she advised.
It's important to keep in mind that - unsurprisingly - the people you are asking will more than likely expect compensation for their services.
If not, Myka recommends recognizing their contribution regardless.
'Even if it's a small gesture or a heartfelt thank you gift,' she said. 'This shows gratitude and respect for their time and effort.'
Myka added people who own their own businesses often find themselves being taken advantage of.
Myka, New York Plaza Hotel's etiquette instructor and the founder of Beaumont Etiquette, told the DailyMail.com if someone wants to gift you a product or service for you big day, they will volunteer their time or recourses- don't ask them (stock image)
'[People often ask for] products or services because they think it's just "free" for the business owner,' she explained.
Another factor to consider, Myka explained, are the hidden costs that people don't always factor in when asking for freebies.
'Whether it be a cookie or cake company, singer, violinist, event planner or other, no matter if it is a product or service they provide, there are many unseen costs to the owner,' she pointed out.
'The cost of the products or the time they are spending at your event when they could be making money elsewhere are common reasons why people who have their own business may not want to "gift" you something from their business.'
Myka added it's also vital to remember the friends you're asking are probably professionals - and asking for their services for free can devalue their work and expertise.
'It's respectful to recognize their skills and at least offer to pay,' she recommended.
'If they then want to offer you a discount or "gift" you for free, that would be their generous decision,' she continued.
She also warned that asking for an outrageous hand-out can strain the relationships you may have with the people you're asking.
'Friends and acquaintances may feel obligated to say yes even if they are uncomfortable or unable to provide the service for free,' she warned.
'This can create tension and strain your relationship.'
It's not only the bride and grooms that need to adhere to some rules.
Last year, Myka spoke with the DailyMail.com, sharing the do's and don'ts for wedding guests.
She advised not wearing an outfit that takes away from the bride, asking before posting photos on social media if the bride and groom have not, and spending between $50 to $100 on a wedding gift.
