EXCLUSIVEEastEnders star's new 'cheerleader': How Jill Halfpenny fell deeply in love with handsome father-of-two after battling alcoholism following tragic sudden death of partner aged 43
The new love helping to heal the heartbreak of TV favourite Jill Halfpenny is a divorced father-of-two who has also suffered a shattering family bereavement, MailOnline can reveal.
Handsome marketing executive Ian McAllister, 48, has brought joy back into the life of the former Strictly winner following the tragic death of her partner Matt Janes from a heart attack in 2017.
Ian, a keen runner who has raised significant sums for charity, is head of marketing at the Duchess of Northumberland's Alnwick Garden, one of the north's most popular tourist attractions.
The former Byker Grove and Eastenders star has told how she and Ian had a 'random and unexpected meeting' last year which led to her falling in love and realising that she could be happy again without feeling guilt.
In the six years since the sudden loss of Matt, who collapsed in the gym aged just 43, she had felt moving on with someone else would be a 'betrayal' and spent time working through her grief.
EastEnders TV favourite Jill Halfpenny has found a new love with handsome marketing executive Ian McAllister
Ian, 48, has brought joy back into the life of the former Strictly winner (Pictured together)
Ian, a keen runner who has raised significant sums for charity, is head of marketing at the Duchess of Northumberland's Alnwick Garden
It's Jill's first romance following the tragic death of her partner Matt Janes from a heart attack in 2017 (pictured, the couple together in 2016)
In her new autobiography, A Life Reimagined, she tells how she was able to talk to Ian about the loss of Matt and the sudden death of her father, Colin, who died aged 36 from a heart attack playing football when she was only four.
She said that Ian was also able to 'share his losses' with her as their relationship progressed.
He has raised hundreds of pounds in memory of his eight-year-old nephew Guy Comber who died in 2013.
In 2016, Ian ran 400 competitive miles for the All4Guy charity, raising money for the Newcastle Healthcare Child Bereavement Unit, competing in two ultra distance runs of 65 and 30 miles, five marathons, two duathlons, 11 half marathons, a 10k run and six Park runs.
In her memoir, Jill tells how meeting him had a transformative effect on her life.
She said: 'For the first time since Matt died I have met someone and fallen in love. We met eleven days after I was offered this book deal and it was a random and unexpected meeting. His name is Ian and he is kind and funny and intelligent.
'The relationship has helped me understand the importance of all the work I have done before I met him. I can allow myself to be happy and in love without feeling any guilt.
'I can be vulnerable and scared and understand where it's coming from. I can be free and open, allowing myself to be seen without fear of abandonment. We are in the very early stages of our relationship and even though I know the story will write itself, I sincerely hope it will be a long and exciting one.
'My experience of losing Dad and Matt means I can either live in dread that this new love will be taken away from me or I can cherish the time we do have together, knowing that life is precious. I choose the latter.
'One of the things I was most scared of in a new relationship was him not being able to handle me talking about Matt.
'I needn't have worried. Ian has asked about Matt from the very beginning. About our time together, what he was like, what we did together. I have never once felt as though he sees him as a threat and it makes me have even more admiration for him.
'We talk freely about my dad too and Ian shared his losses with me. We have both reached an age where loss is inevitable in our lives and to share them is a great gift.'
The former EastEnders actress, 48, said she felt 'cursed' when she lost Matt in 2017
Jill recalled the day Matt died, how she was woken up by him as he headed to a spin class (pictured, the couple together)
Jill Halfpenny's father Colin (pictured) suffered a shock heart attack when she was young
In 2016, Ian ran 400 competitive miles for the All4Guy charity, raising money for the Newcastle Healthcare Child Bereavement Unit
Losing her father led to a battle with drink later in life for Jill, who said she felt a 'weight lifted off her shoulders' when she plucked up the courage to admit she was an alcoholic in an AA meeting in 2013.
She told how she could see herself becoming a 'different person' every time she would binge drink to escape her normality.
In her book, she writes: 'I began to see that I became a different person when I drank and I didn't always like who I became.
'For a long time, alcohol had helped me escape, to stop thinking. Conversely, I thought it also helped me access all the things that lay dormant inside me.'
Though it took several meetings before she could say the words 'My name is Jill and I'm an alcoholic', she admits sharing it was the best thing she ever did.
Ian, who lives in Northumberland, began his career in recruitment with MTV, worked on Ozzy Osbourne's fly-on-the-wall series, set up his own marketing business and then began working for Alnwick Garden.
Appearing on The One Show last month, Jill confirmed she is 'in love' again although did not give any details on her new relationship.
She said: 'When you lose a partner, a romantic relationship, it can sometimes feel slightly like a betrayal if you move on and it's not.
'You're absolutely allowed to be happy again. If you do the process and the healing and the work, you can go into another relationship and be happy again.
'If you haven't managed to do that work, there'll always be a part of you somewhere else. I feel I do deserve to be happy and I do feel happy and it's really nice to be in love again.'
Jill recalled the day Matt died, how she was woken up by him as he headed to a spin class.
The pair were trying for a baby and shared a final loving glance as Jill shuffled to the bathroom to pee on an ovulation stick.
The actress went back to sleep before she was woken up to bangs on her front door and turned to see she had 17 missed calls.
She ran to Matt's gym in Crouch End, north London, and found him lying on the ground. Attempts to revive him were unsuccessful.
The first person Jill called was her mother, who knew the scenario all too well after losing her husband just as suddenly in the late seventies.
'I was ringing her with the news about Matt but I was still thinking about her, that she knows exactly how this feels,' Jill said.
'And I could hear it in her voice, I could hear that she knew I was about to go on that same journey.'
Jill has now revealed that losing Matt, then aged 43, in the same way forced to confront grieving her father (Pictured, the actress in 2016)
Jill said she felt like she met new love Ian at the 'perfect time' (pictured, the couple together)
As a family Jill said she didn't blame her mother, as she knew this was an attempt to protect her and her siblings.
The West End veteran has spoken of her 'unprocessed grief' growing up following her father's death that 'manifested itself' in 'anger' and 'shame.'
'I was in my 20s when I realised a lot of my behaviour was down to this unprocessed grief. I got divorced, I stopped drinking alcohol and then it all seemed so clear – the jigsaw pieces fit,' she said.
But learning to cope with grief all over again in her 40s has made her a 'better person' as she now knows how to be kinder to herself.
'Grief has made me a better person. Processing the grief has softened me and I've become less judgemental about myself. I am my own worst critic, but I have got better,' she said.
Jill was previously married to actor Craig Conway from 2007-2010 and they are parents to 16-year-old son Harvey.
Of her new love, she told Prima magazine: 'It sounds so cheesy, but I think Ian and I met at the perfect time.
'After Matt died, I didn't know if I'd ever meet anyone again, but Ian is my cheerleader - I know I've met somebody who I love and who loves me.'
