Showing posts with label Wordplay. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Wordplay. Show all posts

Wednesday, January 25, 2023

Where’s planet n00b? Oh, there it is!

A few weeks ago, while I was reading The Archaic Revival by Terence McKenna, I ran across this meme:


This got my attention because it was funny, but also because the intended reading, with its Plan(et) B wordplay, synched with one of McKenna's chapter titles.


The drop cap even makes McKenna's beginning look a bit like lolspeak: "o ur present? o hai."

In my January 16 post "The Doors," I write about a cafe called D&D -- but written with an infinity sign for the ampersand, leading me to think that the name was supposed to be D00d -- specifically spelled with a double-zero (I know it's hard to tell in the font I use on this blog), as in "killin ur d00dz."

Today I noticed this just down the street from D&D:


If the ampersand is interchangeable with a double-zero, that's n00b.

Looking up the "planet n00b" meme so I could put it in this post, I found this:


The drugs are a link back to McKenna, and Mars may be relevant in connection with "Knights of Cydonia" (Cydonia being the region where the Face on Mars was found).

Finally, look back at the original meme, and read it straight, as "There's no Planet B." Well, what starts with a B and is conspicuously missing from that picture of Earth? Have you ever heard of a book called Britain as Another Planet?

One other maybe-link. N00b means "newbie," of course. Ben Pratt recently left a comment (a disturbing sync involving a mass murder) in which he mentioned the date he started as a Mormon missionary. New missionaries are called "greenies" and are generally given the St. Patrick treatment -- the trainer wears a green tie and treats them to a "greenie breakfast" featuring green pancakes, green milk, and so on. Possibly relevant to the Green Door theme.

Wednesday, September 21, 2022

Better Masonic headlines

Original:

Better headline: Masonic lodge initiates a lad



Original:

Better headline: Masonic lodge: In it I ate salad

Tuesday, August 2, 2022

Good riddance, Big Ben!

Taiwan's mask mandate, which is still in force, allows masks to be removed in special situations -- including (last I checked) eating, drinking, walking, riding a motorcycle, taking a photo, and lecturing -- so I'm pretty much good. My students, who have to sit at their desks without doing any of those things, not so much.

A few days ago, one of my private students said, "It's not fair that I have to wear a mask but you don't!"

"It certainly isn't," I said. "Feel free to take it off if you like."

"I can't!" she said. "Big Ben says I have to wear it."

Big Ben! I wish I had thought of that.

The Minister of Health and Welfare -- "Taiwan's Dr. Fauci" and the world's most powerful dentist -- was called Chen Shih-chung (陳時中), and his given name is a perfect homophone of 時鐘, the Chinese word for "clock." The Chinese for "stupid" is 笨, pronounced ben, and so Big Ben in London is called 大笨鐘 -- literally, "Big Stupid Clock."

It's just a perfect nickname -- a very clever Chinese-English pun, and (much like "Let's go Brandon") indirect enough to make it playfully irreverent rather than just rude. Forget the old "Tooth Fairy" nickname; I'm never calling him anything but Big Ben from now on.

So imagine my mixed feelings when I discovered, just days later, that Big Ben had resigned! Not in disgrace, mind you, but to focus on his run for Mayor of Taipei -- a position which is generally recognized as a stepping-stone to the presidency. The good news is that Big Ben will likely be in the public eye for many years to come, giving me ample opportunity to talk about him. The bad news is that he hasn't really stepped down but stepped up, and the new guy will probably be just as bad but without the awesome nickname.

Friday, January 21, 2022

Non volo peccare


Back in July 2021, William Wildblood wrote a post about the birdemic pecks titled "Non Volo Peccare," ending with this: "Note: I translate the title I Do Not Want to be Pecked but it's been a long time since I studied Latin so that may not be entirely accurate" -- a pun on our code-word peck and the Latin peccare, "to sin." Noticing that peccare is even closer to peccary than to peck, I left a comment saying that his title actually meant "I don't want a javelina pig." Then William, taking advantage of the double meaning of volo ("I want" or "I fly"), said that the real translation was "Pigs don't fly."

Today it occurred to me that, leaving aside the whole "peck" angle, it's quite appropriate that Non volo peccare, "I don't want to sin," can be punningly mistranslated as "Pigs don't fly." The pig is proverbially unclean, debased, and addicted to earthly pleasures, and "when pigs fly" means "never." To want to ascend to Heaven ("fly") whilst remaining a "pig" is to want the impossible.

But behold, your days of probation are past; ye have procrastinated the day of your salvation until it is everlastingly too late, and your destruction is made sure; yea, for ye have sought all the days of your lives for that which ye could not obtain; and ye have sought for happiness in doing iniquity, which thing is contrary to the nature of that righteousness which is in our great and Eternal Head (Helaman 13:38).

One also thinks of this story.

In the Hindu tradition there is this story: The God of the Universe became curious about how it felt to be a pig. So he entered the body of one. He found it delightful beyond compare -- how good the sty smelled, how sweet were the slops, how desirable were the female pigs. But the universe needed tending. There was work to be done. So the helpers and handmaidens went and said, "God, you must come out of there. The universe needs you." God said, "Who are you talking to? I am just a pig! Leave me alone!" So they killed the pig, and God came out, and refused to believe he had ever refused to leave (Whitley Strieber, The Key).

Sunday, December 26, 2021

Greek letters

Various people have noticed that Delta Omicron is an anagram of media control.

The Vigilant Citizen notices a further fact about these two letters:

Weird fact: Omicron originates from the Phoenician letter ayin which means “eye”. The symbol representing Delta is a triangle. The combination of the two = the ultimate symbol of the occult elite.

Once that connection has been made, one notices that Delta Omicron is also an anagram of triad monocle. A triad is a group of three, which may be represented as a triangle, and also happens to be the name given to certain Chinese organized crime syndicates that use the triangle as their emblem. Monocle, though today it refers to an eyeglass, was originally an adjective meaning "one-eyed."

The first "variant" was of course called Alpha. If Omicron ends up being the last, then we will have a distorted version of "Alpha and Omega" -- with Omega ("great O") being replaced by Omicron ("little O"). Not with a bang but a whimper.

Thursday, December 16, 2021

Come quickly, O Frabjous Day!

For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.
-- Hebrews 4:12

There's been a lot of talk about the Mark of the Beast these days, and the rough consensus of those in my extended spiritual circle seems to be that while the pecks and the surveillance system associated with them may not be the Mark -- that is, that the Revelation of John is unlikely to be a coded description of 2021 specifically -- it is an extremely clear example of that sort of thing: a mark of a beast.

And what shall we call this particular beast, this venomous juggernaut of malarkey, this personification of sinister hypodermic shenanigans which is at the same time a sort of apotheosis of complete and utter bullshit? Isn't it obvious? With a nod to the Brits, whose formerly localized slang for a particular medical procedure went global this year, I give you the Jabberwock.


And, well, we know how that poem ends. Carroll said that, while he understood the etymologies of most of the nonsense words in Jabberwocky, he was never quite able to figure out where vorpal had come from. One commentator's proposal is that it was made by taking alternate letters from the words verbal and gospel -- the Word of God, quick and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword. Snicker-snack!

Hold on, and pray that the Frabjous Day be hastened. Because it is coming, and heads will roll, but what is to come after is still undecided. Pray not for the guillotine, that debased parody, but for the True and Vorpal Sword.

Maid of Heaven, be with us.

Monday, December 13, 2021

NHS

Somewhere in Unsong, Scott Alexander mentions that the initials of Martin Luther King spell out the Hebrew translation of his surname. Since the Hebrew alphabet includes only consonants, melech, "king," is spelled mem-lamed-kaph — MLK.

The serpent, twined around the Rod of Asclepius, is the universal symbol of the medical profession, which in Britain is administered by the National Health Service. The Hebrew for “serpent” is nahash, which is spelled nun-heth-shin — NHS.

Nahash, by the way, is a singularly appropriate word. Etymologically, nun is “fish,” heth is “thread,” and shin is “tooth.” What better name for a scaly, cold-blooded animal that is long and thin and is notable for its sharp fangs?

Wednesday, November 3, 2021

Brandon's number

"Let's go, Brandon!" -- originally supposed to be a cheer for NASCAR driver Brandon Brown -- is now code for a vulgar execration beginning with the letter F.


Brandon Brown's number is 68.


Q is the 17th letter of the alphabet, and so the number 17 is synonymous with the letter Q.


Brandon Brown's number is thus equal to 4Q.


And 4Q is code for a vulgar execration beginning with the letter F.


Thy firmness makes my circle just, and makes me end where I began.

Thursday, October 21, 2021

Libra

Except when it occurs at the end of a word, the [z] sound is difficult for many Chinese speakers to pronounce correctly and often comes out more like [l]. Zero, for example, is a particular challenge for many and often comes out as "lee-lo." This can lead to some unintentionally very funny statements, like, "I haven't been to the loo since I was a child."

Many years ago, I had occasion to discuss the signs of the zodiac with a group of adult students in Taiwan, and one of them said, "I'm a Leo, and my wife is a Libra, so it's a perfect match." Everyone laughed, but I didn't get it until he explained: "Because Leo is a lion, and lions like to eat libras."

I'm not sure why that popped back into my head more than a decade later, but today it occurred to me that there may be something deeper to this particular Chinglish pun. Aren't zebra-stripes, just as much as the scales, a symbol of objective justice impartially administered?



Sunday, October 10, 2021

I now support the LGBTQ movement.

Y'all knew this was coming, ever since I embraced the rainbow flag.

LGB = Let's Go Brandon

T? Q? Hmm . . . whatever could those two letters represent?

Saturday, October 9, 2021

If I needed an occult pseudonym, like Éliphas Lévi . . .

When Alphonse-Louis Constant needed a pen name for his occult writings, he chose Hebrew names that were somewhat similar to his own given names. Alphonse became Éliphas (Eliphaz, son of Esau and friend of Job), and Louis became Lévi (Levi, son of Jacob and father of the Levites; Rabbi Louis Ginzberg also used Levi as his Hebrew name).

Today, a rather convoluted series of syncs -- taking me from the "tulip tree," Liriodendrom tulipifera, to the Luria-dendron of the qlippoth -- led me to the Lurianic terms Olam ha-Tohu (World of Chaos) and Olam ha-Tikkun (World of Rectification) -- and the latter is pretty clearly my own personal Éliphas Lévi. William becomes Olam (also transliterated Gholam; cf. Guillaume), and Tychonievich (a Ukrainian patronymic from the personal name Tikhon) becomes Tikkun. I guess Olam ben-Tikkun would be the proper form.

One major drawback is the similarity to tikkun olam, which is the Jewish term for Leftist "social justice."

Saturday, September 18, 2021

Dollar Tree deplatformed

Bad news: If you want to download the app that gives you digital coupons, loyalty points and more at America’s second-largest chain of discount variety stores, you won’t be able to do it on your iPhone. That’s right, Dollar Tree is the latest company to be permanently banned from the App Store.

In a statement, Apple said the decision was made out of respect for the sensibilities of their Muslim customers, whose religion strictly forbids iDollar Tree.

Greece's lost all-female epics

It's a little known fact that Euripides, always a man ahead of his time, once had an ambitious plan to reboot the Homeric epics with an all-female cast of characters. Since there weren't enough legendary female warriors to meet the needs of the plot, he ended up deciding to press the goddesses themselves into service. The great warrior Achilles, for example, was to be replaced by Athena, the most martial of the goddesses. This led to trouble when it came time to choose a suitable Odysseus-analogue, though. Athena was once again the most natural choice but had already been taken for the Achilles role. In the end, he decided on Hera, thinking her vengeful jealousy would make her perfect for the scene where Odysseus slaughters the suitors who had been courting his wife in his absence.

However, neither of these planned epics was ever written. The priests soon got wind of Euripides's plan, and they flatly forbade him to go through with it.

"The first epic is out of the question," said one of the priests. "Imagine portraying Pallas Athena as a sulky, temperamental Achilles. It would be blasphemy!"

"Quite right," said another priest, "and the second would be even worse."

"Worse than blasphemy against Pallas Athena?" 

"The first epic would be blasphemy,” the second priest replied, “but the second would be Herassey."

Friday, September 17, 2021

The bric-a-brac of the Right

Very strange, meaningful-seeming dream:

I was part of a group (I just thought of them as "my friends") that met twice weekly to share ideas and creative output. The dream consisted of a few disconnected scenes having to do with that group.

In the first scene, I was preparing to go to one of our meetings and then suddenly remembered that it was actually scheduled for the next day. While I was preparing, I was aware that there was some major disturbance going on outside -- perhaps a war or something like that.

In the second scene, one of the members, a woman, had created a short animated film that progressed very quickly from playful to "edgy" to deeply -- and I do mean deeply -- obscene. No one raised any objection. I didn't either, though I wanted to, because there was just this feeling that we were all supposed to be too cool to take issue with that sort of thing.

In the third scene, another of the members, an older man, was telling a story about some third party (not part of the group) who had made a shirt for himself and "decorated it with the bric-a-brac of the Right -- a slice of pizza, a Torah scroll, other such things. And this of course made him guilty of both the sin of fragmentation and the sin of creating a coherent story."

I thought of the "bric-a-brac of the Right" as being something like the "secret symbols" in Bizarro comics (recurring random items, such as a slice of pie or an upside-down bird, which the artist adds to his cartoons), and I was pretty (but not entirely) sure the man was using "sin" ironically -- saying that the public disapproved of these so-called sins. I took the slice of pizza to be an allusion to the conspiracy theory associated with that foodstuff and the inclusion of a Torah scroll to be some kind of anti-Semitic thing. 

Upon waking, I thought of the incongruity of characterizing the Torah as bric-a-brac, of all things, and it reminded me of something. Back in the days of daily newspapers, my father and I used to share the hobby of creating what he called "subliminal comics." The idea was to cut out three or four panels -- each from a different comic in the same paper -- and combine them to make a new strip that sort of made sense. One time (it was, apparently, on the palindromic date of October 2, 2001) I bent the rules of the game a bit, by combining a headline with a comic-strip panel. The headline, from the Style section of the local paper, said "Crosses are once again popular, but some see wearing a religious symbol for fashion's sake as a desecration" -- and I juxtaposed it with this panel from that day's Dilbert strip.

Before looking up the comic just now, I had forgotten that it featured a 2020s-style surgical mask and that the creature with which Dilbert is conversing -- a flubbed clone of his boss -- is half horse, as in a recent birdemic joke.

Later that day, I was out on the road. When I stopped at a red light, the motorcyclist in front of me was wearing a shirt decorated with the letters of the alphabet, each accompanied by two associated words and illustrations. This made for a pretty random assortment of pictures -- what the dream in its not-quite-normal use of English would have termed "bric-a-brac."

Of the 20 or so words I could see on the back of shirt, three were misprinted, and they were all in the same area. I snapped a photo.


With a large "letter Q," do we now have not mere common or garden bric-a-brac, but specifically the bric-a-brac of the Right? Notice that both of the words associated with Q are misprinted so as to omit the key letter. Instead of a question, a ruestion; instead of a quail, a uail. Of course, "No Q" is also a Q thing. There's the NOQ Report, and included in the boilerplate at the beginning of every Anonymous Conservative post is the disclaimer "No Q." Just below these two Q-less Q-words, we have V for wolcano.  I remember reading some symbolic interpretation of the alphabet in which W stood for the Roman god Vulcan (since historically W = VV = VU), and volcano comes from Vulcan. (Thinking of such words as uomo, uovo, buono, and ruota, I checked if perhaps vuolcano might be Italian; it isn't.)

Having mentioned "a uail," and also noted that U and V used to be interchangeable, I am reminded of my first mention of Joan of Arc on this blog, in this comment:

I have recently been reading Scott Alexander's novel Unsong. One of the running gags is "biblical pun correction." One of the characters mentions Joan of Arc and is "corrected" by another: "Jonah whale; Noah ark." Later in the conversation, someone says "to no avail" and received the converse correction: "Noah ark; Jonah whale."

The correction is based on hearing "avail" as "a whale," echoed by the V/W confusion seen in wolcano.

All of the items in the photo above also have Torah connections. In Exodus 16, the Israelites are fed with manna and quail, and the word manna is said to derive from the question "What is it?" Mount Sinai, with its fire and smoke, is certainly suggestive of a volcano. (Freud and a few other fringe critics have concluded that it literally was a volcano, but that seems geographically unlikely.) And, in the archaic spelling of the King James Version, Moses "put a vail on his face" (Ex. 34:33).

What does it all mean? Well, that's the point, isn't it? I've been collecting coincidences like bric-a-brac, like a Bizarro reader playing find the secret symbol, only occasionally discerning a coherent message. Maybe it's time to stop amassing data and start trying a little harder to understand it. I always tag these posts with a line from Dylan; maybe I should pay more attention to the rest of the verse:

The highway is for gamblers, better use your sense
Take what you have gathered from coincidence
The empty-handed painter from your streets
Is drawing crazy patterns on your sheets
This sky, too, is folding under you
And it's all over now, Baby Blue

Update: I thought, "Give me a hint. What's the core meaning of all these syncs?" and drew a single card from the Rider-Waite. It was this one.

And I thought, It's the wolcano! -- a mountain-like structure with fire coming out the top of it, with a W-shaped lightning bolt. "The Tower" is also an anagram of "two three," and W is the 23rd letter of the alphabet. The card features 22 little yellow flames, with the 23rd being the W-shaped bolt from the black.

The image also punningly suggests bric-a-brac -- the Tower of Babel was built with bricks (apparently a novel construction material at the time), and the Hebrew word for "lightning" is baraq. It is even "brac of the Right," since the baraq comes from the right side of the card. Brique à baraq -- brick for the lightning!

Bric-a-brac is b-a-b, -- bab, "gate," the first morpheme in Babel, "Gate of El." El, besides being a name of God, is how a Cockney would pronounce hell -- as in "upon this rock I will build my church; and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it" (Matt. 16:18). The tower on the card is built on a rock, and the Tarot de Marseille calls it not The Tower but La Maison Dieu, "the House of God."

Babel is also synonymous with the confusion on tongues -- exemplified by, say, ruestion, uail, and wolcano.

Bric-a-brac also contains the string abrac, as in abracadabra.


Nimrod, besides being the name of the man behind the Tower of Babel, is a nickname used by Bugs Bunny for Elmer Fudd, a character notable for his non-standard use of the W sound -- "That wascally wabbit!"

But none of this is an interpretation; it's just adding more synchronistic bric-a-brac to the mix.

Tuesday, August 24, 2021

Or the battle will be hotter, and you won't get no supper


Ages ago in Ohio, a kid in my neighborhood got a pet rabbit that was slinky and black -- so he named it Slink-ack. Now that kid's all grown up and, apparently, working as a branding consultant for Pfizer.

Anyway, I'm sure you've heard that the first peck has been officially approved, and has been given a name that makes Humpty Dumpty with his portmanteau look like an amateur -- an unpronounceable, impossible-to-remember string of letters that was apparently intended to evoke corvid, mRNA, immunity, community, comorbidity, Comintern, and covfefe.

And you know what that means? It means we get to rebrand "vaccine hesitancy" as


Of course even a prophetic musician like Bob can't be expected to have predicted some made-up nonsense name almost 50 years in advance with any precision -- but I think Congo-Bongo-Natty comes impressively close!

So roll up your sleeve and take your Safe-n-Effective medicine, kids, or else you know what comes next: That's right, more dread-locks in Babylon!

In the meantime, enjoy a little music from a more human time.

Ace of Hearts

On the A page of Animalia , an Ace of Hearts is near a picture of a running man whom I interpreted as a reference to Arnold Schwarzenegger....